« Take a Walk on the Wild Side - Part IISelf-Esteem and Healthy Habits Part II »Self-Esteem and Healthy Habits
Feeling rejected, feeling less than, less important, less worthy, judgment of self or others, are all at the basis of low self-esteem.
Feeling strong, confident, secure and knowing that you are doing your best, loving others even though they are not perfect, lack of judgment, following your own moral values are the basis for healthy self-esteem.
Habits are at the center of our personality; they come from our subconscious. We have habits in our lives, some of them serve us and others do not. But how often do we question them and consciously reprogram them?
Correcting something you find that is “not so nice within yourself,” or others, is not about appreciating that it is there. That is a misunderstanding. Why is it there? Because somewhere along the track, somewhere in your past you created this habit of thought and action. Now it is for you to reprogram yourself such that balance is achieved and a new and empowering habit is formed.
When bad and painful things occur, when your judgments begin to come out, you can appreciate the situation because you have a chance to grow, you have a chance to see what needs correcting, which is more likely to be your judgment rather than the outer circumstance. You can appreciate and love the people involved, even if you do not love their behavior.
You love others; you love yourself, because God is inside. Jesus said, “What you do to the least of my brother you do to me.” That is because in reality we are all one being. The thoughts, the behaviors, may need to evolve, but you can still love anyway.
Are we being honest? If not, then there will be some sort of guilt, which erodes self-esteem.
Are we being loving? If not, then how do we expect to feel well with that unloving energy moving through us.
Are we in judgment? If so then we will judge ourselves too, because we are all one the reality is that we are judging ourselves.
Are we hiding, blaming others, manipulating, stealing, looking for approval, desperate, needy? All of these thought and behavior patterns will make it difficult, if not impossible to have healthy sense of self-esteem. There may be extenuating circumstances that a person with healthy self-esteem finds themselves in where they may have to hide or manipulate a situation for the better. But if you do not have a healthy sense of self-esteem, and this is your regular pattern, even if there are good reasons you need to behave in this way, your progress will be slow.
It is important that you work these issues out, even on the smallest level, or you will have some guilt that remains inside. If you are working on these issues, and making progress, and understanding how the changes are made, it will be much easier to relax and love yourself through the process.
Love and Blessings,
Michael Skowronski
Author
