* If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali.
* If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho.
* If Ella Fitzgerald married Darth Vader, she'd be Ella Vader.
* If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she'd be Oprah Chopra.
* If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, he'd be Cat Doggy Dogg.
* If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton- John Newton John.
* If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster.
* If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.
* If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.
* If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy Dogg Pooh.
* How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd be Boog Alou.
* If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced him to marry Kenny G., he'd be G. Ghali G.
* Nog (Quark's brother on "Star Trek: Deep Space Nine") has no other name, so he uses it twice when getting a marriage license. If he married Howard Hughes, and then Pamela Dare, he'd be Nog Nog Hughes Dare.
* If Jack Handy (SNL writer) married Andy Capp, then married Jack Paar, then moved on to Stephen King, he'd be Jack Handy Capp Paar King.
* If Woody Allen married Natalie Wood, divorced her and married Gregory Peck, divorced him and married Ben Hur, he'd be Woody Wood Peck Hur.
* If Ivana Trump married, in succession, Orson Bean (actor), King Oscar (of Norway), Louis B. Mayer (of MGM), and Norbert Wiener (mathematician), she would then be Ivana Bean Oscar Mayer Wiener.
* If Dolly Parton married Tommy Smothers, then Mr. Lucky, then Martin Short, then football kicker Ray Guy, we could all nod understandingly when we heard Dolly Parton Smothers Lucky Short Guy.
