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cmrdan
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mem_normal2 OFFLINE
Male
65 years old
Springdale, Utah
United States
Profile Views: 663
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MEMBER SINCE: 04/17/2011
STAR SIGN: Virgo
LAST LOGIN: 01/22/2016 09:49:23






cmrdan has 1 friend(s)



Displaying 6 out of 6 comments
02/16/2018 16:33:47


Joke: A Problematic Race Horse.


A champion jockey is about to enter an important race on a new horse. The horse's trainer meets him before the race and says, "All you have to remember with this horse is that every time you approach a jump, you have to shout, "ALLLLEEE OOOP!" really loudly in the horse's ear. Providing you do that, you'll be fine."

The jockey thinks the trainer is mad but promises to shout the command. The race begins and they approach the first hurdle. The jockey ignores the trainer's ridiculous advice and the horse crashes straight through the center of the jump.
They carry on and approach the second hurdle. The jockey, somewhat embarrassed, whispers "Aleeee ooop" in the horse's ear. The same thing happens - the horse crashes straight through the center of the jump.

At the third hurdle, the jockey thinks, "It's no good, I'll have to do it," and yells, "ALLLEEE OOOP!" really loudly. Sure enough, the horse sails over the jump with no problems. This continues for the rest of the race, but due to the earlier problems, the horse only finishes third.
The trainer is fuming and asks the jockey what went wrong. The jockey replies, "Nothing is wrong with me - it's this bloody horse. What is he - deaf or something?"
The trainer replies, "Deaf?? DEAF?? You

idiot, he's not deaf - he's BLIND!"

I M NOT BLIND BUT I M BLIND BECAUS I LOVE YOU, HAVE A NICE WEEKEND, GOD BLESS YOU.




enjoy your weekend


i'm off see ya later 




02/09/2018 14:07:51

Joke: The Supportive Wife


A retired gentleman went into the social security office to apply for social security. After waiting in line for a long time, he got to the counter. The woman behind the counter asked him for his driver's license to verify his age.



He looked in his pockets and realized he had left his wallet at home. He told the woman that he was very sorry but he seemed to have left his wallet at home.


“Will I have to go home and come back now?” he asked.
The woman said, “Unbutton your shirt.”


So he opened his shirt, revealing lots of silver, curly hair.


She said, “That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me.” And she processed his social security application.
When he got home, the man excitedly told his wife about his experience at the social security office.


She sniffed at him, “You should have dropped your pants, you might have qualified for disability, too.”

WELL MY PRETTY FRIEND I LOVE YOU AND WISH YOU A HAPPY WEEKEND, GOD BLESS YOU, HUGS.


a
you are in possession of hotnesshave a hot weekend 




02/02/2018 14:40:17

THE PROSTITUTE PARROT


"New house, new madame, new prostitutes"


The daughters can not contain their laughter and wait for their father to arrive to see the parrot.


The father arrives at lunchtime and the parrot says:


"New house, new madame, new prostitutes, but the same clients ... hello Peeeepe!"


"New house, new madame, new prostitutes"


The daughters can not contain their laughter and wait for their father to arrive to see the parrot.


The father arrives at lunchtime and the parrot says:


"New house, new madame, new prostitutes, but the same clients ... hello Peeeepe!"




be my valentine
l
how ya bee?

have a great weekend




01/26/2018 16:55:52

A 60-year-old millionaire was getting married and threw a big wedding reception.

 

The big day arrived, and he got married to his stunning 23-year-old bride in the vast garden of his 50,000-square-foot mansion.

Champagne was flowing and an enormous team of waiters was flitting about serving the finest hors-d'oeuvres in the land.

Naturally, the millionaire’s less wealthy friends couldn’t help but feel jealous.

In a quiet moment, one of them asked him how he landed such a young beauty.

“Simple,” grinned the millionaire, “I faked my age.'

His friends were really amazed and asked him how old he said he was.

“87!” he replied.


poisson d'avril


petit dèj du dimanche


Bonne journée ensoleillée




01/19/2018 14:16:24

I Hear America Singing



By




I hear America singing, the varied carols I hear,

Those of mechanics, each one singing his as it should be blithe and strong,

The carpenter singing his as he measures his plank or beam,

The mason singing his as he makes ready for work, or leaves off work,

The boatman singing what belongs to him in his boat, the deckhand singing on the steamboat deck,

The shoemaker singing as he sits on his bench, the hatter singing as he stands,

The wood-cutter's song, the ploughboy's on his way in the morning, or at noon intermission or at sundown,

The delicious singing of the mother, or of the young wife at work, or of the girl sewing or washing,

Each singing what belongs to him or her and to none else,

The day what belongs to the day - at night the party of young fellows, robust, friendly,

Singing with open mouths their strong melodious songs.


I D LIKE THAT YOU HAVE A  GREAT WEEKEND, GOD BLESS YOU. A STRONG HUG.



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01/12/2018 12:33:49









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The Wonderfulness of Your Essence and Your Authenticity

I want to share this message with you because you are beautiful as you are, thank you for being like that! In essence you, in essence so beautiful ... Today I want to tell you that I value you and I love you.

Accept and enjoy that which makes you unique.

You do not pretend to be like the others expect you to be.

Do not be afraid to be different.

Nobody in the world has the same things in mind,

in the soul or in the spirit that you.

This is a gift just for you.

Think about it and reflect on your authenticity.

Nobody can talk with your words.

No one can smile with your smile.

And never try to change that.

Because you are perfect just as you are,

and the others we value you for being YOU.





HAPPY WEEKEND, GOD BLESS YOU.





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