Hello, World!  In-between being married five times, I've been single.  Whenever the new Single Phase descends upon me, I am thrown into the arena of singledom and all that this implies. This last time finds me at a unique and pivotal point in life at the ripe old age of 59 (Sept 24th).  You would think, you'd think, that as we grow older, we also grow wiser in a number of ways, and this would include our interaction with the opposite sex ~ How we approach another individual; how we interact with them on a human, compassionate, intelligent level.  How we pick up on their vibes, their natural energy, and their unspoken feelings.

You would think that, naturally, just like everything else in life, we'd get more tuned in, more mature, and better at this; what with getting older, and life experience, and everything. 

Well, you'd be wrong.

To be honest, I don't think anything has changed in this arena of life since Junior High.  Sad, but true.  The only difference I see so far is there are no curfews; and we're more concerned with taxes, insurance, and retirement plans rather than hall passes and homework.

With all this in mind, new as I am yet to this Single Phase, I've decided to write this essay directed at men, on how NOT to pick up chicks.  I don't have a choice really.  It was either write this blog post, or scream "Are you F***'in kidding me?!!!" from my roof top, which would probably have disturbed my neighbors and alarmed my children.

So, with that said, here's how NOT to pick up chicks ~

1.  Be totally self-absorbed.

Naturally, when you're trying to pick up a woman, she's going to want to know every minute detail about YOU; and you can automatically assume, right off the bat, that she's going to share all of your interests with great enthusiasm and devotion.  Don't bother asking her about HER interests, or hobbies, dreams or goals, favorite pastimes, etc.  She's going to find you so magnetic, so mesmerizing, that she will automatically keel over in rapt joy at the prospect of car shows, car races, baseball, football, poker, etc. etc.  She will wait with feverish anticipation, putting her entire life and activities on hold, to be asked to join you in your sacred world.  Your charm has won her over, she will revolve around your existence, your needs and wants, totally captivated by you, abandoning all other responsibilities, personal activities, or relationships that might interfere with your world.

If you do happen to slip in a question about what she likes to do, or what she's accomplished, or interested in, don't bother following up on it.  Just asking the question is enough to show her that you really care about her as a person.

2.  Give her intimate details about your past partners.

There's nothing that a woman loves more than to hear about your sexual escapades with former partners...everything from what kind of sex they like, what positions worked for them, as well as some personal one-on-one memorable moments.  Also, be sure to share naked photos former partners have shared with you, which can also lead to a discussion of breasts, breast size, areola shapes, the differences in shades of pubic hair, etc.   As you're relating all of these fascinating details, make sure that you whine a great deal about what a bitch your former wife (or girl friend) is.  Make sure you expand on how disgusting you find her, how stupid, illiterate, conniving, slutty, or how she started off really cool, but of course, transformed into any of the previously listed attributes.

3.  "No" doesn't really mean "no".

If a woman turns you down flat, don't give up.  You're so charming and attractive and such a good catch that she's just playing hard to get, or she just doesn't know what she really wants.  When she says, "No, I do not want to go out with you."...she's just kidding, or she really wants to, she just hasn't figured out her own mind yet, she's confused.  So you have to show her.  This means that you need to tell her even more about yourself.  Don't bother trying to get to know her on any sort of deeper level; you're so interesting that she'll be absorbed by it, and besides, her interests/hobbies/accomplishments won't be that interesting, and they're probably miniscule in comparison to you and your life.

If she's really stubborn and just can't make up her mind, and she keeps refusing your invitations, make sure that she see's you with other women, so she gets an idea of just how attractive and desirable you are.

4.  A Few Last Pointers ~

A.  It's okay if you're not financially stable, or able to pay your own bills.  Once you get this gal on board, she can help you with these issues.

B.  If you don't own a home, or you don't maintain your own space (as in renting an apartment), don't worry.  Once you get this gal on board, you can move into her place.

C.  If you don't own a vehicle, it's really not a problem.  Once you get this gal on board, she can either be your personal chauffeur, or you can borrow her car.

It's all good.

Tags: dating, social activities,

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Thought for the day ~

Women in their 20s are new to everything, including their own personas.  At this stage of life, you begin to explore who you are, what you believe, what you want out of life, how you feel about yourself, and how you connect and relate to the world and the people in it; and most of all, how you connect and relate to yourself.  It all feels kind of birth new, and uncertain, and fragile, and the whole “You” might feel slightly “plastic”.  This isn’t because you’re fake, or you’re not sincere; it’s because you’re just at the beginning of all this exploration, and some of what you think you know and feel and have figured out now will change.  You’ll actually morph numerous times throughout life, through various stages, redefining yourself each time.

But at the other end of the spectrum, at some point, when  a woman reaches a certain age… the plastic breaks, and you discover that you’ve spent a lifetime creating a beautiful mold in which to cast the most remarkable and breathtaking “YOU”.

Blessings,
Amythyst

Tags: women, inspiration, life coaching, personal, defining yourself,

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Cats…they wreak of mysticism, they know what they know, and they keep secrets. Cats don’t pressure you for emotions you don’t feel like showing. They know when to crawl into your lap and seek your attention and affection, and they know when to retreat into the shadows and leave your space open and clear. Cats walk with spirits and commune with fairies; they don’t encompass magick, they are magick.

Tags: personal reflectiion

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I watched a wonderful DVD series this week highlighting the birth of feminine spirituality.  It was full of all the inspiring women of the time– Starhawk, Jean Bolyn, Merlin Stone, Shekinah Mountainwater, as well as a score of other eloquent and beautiful Ladies (authors, activists, film producers, artists, etc.).  The main concept that struck me was the idea that the emergence of the patriarchal system, along with the fall of the goddess, all contributed to the erosion of feminine spirituality, the end of matriarchy, and its biggest impact was on women’s relationships with other women.  We lost the “Sisterhood”.  We became suspicious of each other.  Something was stolen from us, something almost intangible, something undefinable. The unity was gone, the respect was gone, the connection was warped and broken.

With the advent of the snake and the apple story, the whole women-are-responsible-for-the-downfall-of-civilization phenomena, respect and power, camaraderie and trust, were all lost for the women of the world.  The new patriarchal culture threw a dark shadow on womanhood, and it was contagious, contagious even to us, to women.  My mother and I talked about this once, how women behave towards other women, the back-stabbing, the bitchiness, the suspicion.  It was an accurate observation, and it left us to ponder.

Can it be repaired?  And if so, what can be done to fix it?

1.  We come towards each other already suspicious, suspicious of motives, intentions, sincerity…

and this crap involves all aspects of life– beginning with men (husbands, boyfriends, significant others).  Why?  Why don’t we trust other women in our lives with our partners, even when we have no legitimate reason not to?  Is it just a hormonal mating Neanderthal thing?  I hope not.  I’d like to think that we’ve evolved past this.  Maybe it’s our own insecurity– Are we attractive enough, are we too fat, are we too thin, are we satisfying sexual partners, are we successful enough, are we accomplished enough?  Is this other woman prettier, is she younger, is she more accomplished, more successful, more desirable?

We have to work at building and maintaining a healthy ego.  We have to learn to appreciate ourselves, to meet our full potential, to find the joy in life.  We have to learn to be all that we were meant to be; and we have to learn to be proud of this.  We have to learn to relish pride in ourselves.  This isn’t being egotistical; it’s being healthy, it’s being honest, it’s being strong.

2.  We’ve got backstabbing down to a fine art…

There is nothing worse than a hen-party that takes on a very dark energy when the hens start pecking at a missing sister.  Why do we do this?  And it gains momentum, it really does, as each woman in turn comes up with a negative observation, a piece of gossip, something that they would never dream of saying to the victim’s face.  Why?…enjoyment, in some weird and twisted way?…a primeval instinct to travel in packs, and to gang up on a member who doesn’t fit into all the correct forms, all the politically/socially correct boxes and niches?  Or is it a power play, since we still obviously possess pack mentality, and there has to be an Alpha female, so we’ll spar and battle until only one is left standing?

3.  There is no sense of “Sisterhood”, no sense of loyalty, real loyalty, the old-fashioned kind...

“I’ll be your friend till the end.”…what a beautiful sentiment, but I don’t believe a word of it.  It’s more like…”I’ll be your friend until you don’t conform to my idea of what you should be; I’ll be your friend until someone else comes along that I’m more infatuated with, I’m more in-tune with; until someone else comes along that satisfies me emotionally in the friend department, someone who agrees with me, someone who will follow me.  I’ll be your friend, until I don’t feel like it anymore.

I wrote a blog post a few years ago, in which I describe my idea of a friend and ‘sister’…

“A Sister, should be a Sister, should be a Sister…*Forever*.  It’s not a ‘when-I-feel-like-it’ thing; it should not rely on the conditions of outside influences, human frailties, insecurities, or pettiness.  A Sister is someone you grow old with; and on your way to this destination, you pass all the other stages of life– bumpy, smooth, unpleasant, and joyous– and you know, without a crumb of a doubt, that your Sister will travel this road with you, shoulder to shoulder, to the end and beyond.”

4.  There is no common spiritual ground (the goddess) in today’s culture, patriarchy dominates the scene…

I know that I’ve personally lost friends because of my spiritual path– from Jehovah’s Witnesses, to Christian Fundamentalist, to just plain Christians in the mainstream.  If we don’t travel the same spiritual path, apparently, we cannot travel together at all.  Why?  It’s joyous to share a friendship with someone who views life and spirituality in the same way, but that doesn’t mean we can’t embrace friends who forge different trails.  There can always be a general meeting place in the center of the forest, a sunny clearing where we can all lay aside our differences to gather together and share life’s experiences, and plans, and disappointments, and victories.

This is the hard part of this essay.  I feel that the reader will expect me to end with some magickal solution to this problem, some instant fix, and I don’t think this is possible.  In that case, it makes this blog post more of an observation, which leaves more questions here, at the end, than it did to start with. But I believe we have to look back, far into the past, when the Goddess ruled the earth and woman’s power was respected. We have to look back, far into the past, when society viewed woman, in all stages of her life, with reverence and awe.  We have to look back, far into the past, to an ancient time, when women had respect for themselves…and respect for their sisters.

Tags: feminism, feminine spirituality, goddess, women's issues, womanhood, sister

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Grow, Sweet Woman, grow in time, grow in wisdom, grow in laughter, grow in strength, grow in love, grow in power, grow in creativity, grow in magick.

Excel
Succeed
Experience
Enjoy

The 10th Year
The Threshold:  Childhood…Maidenhood
I still have one foot in the world of my childhood, but I can see through the open threshold before me.  The view is hazy yet.  It’s still so early, and I am still so young.  I see a shadow of the woman I will become.

The 20th Year
The Threshold:  Adolcescence…Adulthood
I’m taking baby steps, trying out my adult legs, finding my center.  Which direction will I go?  Where will I establish my roots?…roots of career and relationships.  The foundation I build now will determine the stability of my future.  Is it really all just a roll of the dice, or does destiny lay in my young and inexperienced hands?

The 30th Year
The Threshold:  Maidenhood…Motherhood
I step through a doorway to find myself standing in the mad rush of Life.  I am careening along at full speed, swerving to avoid potholes, watching the clock, knowing that I have a destination and a dead line to meet, knowing I have an appointment with Responsibility.

The 40th Year
The Threshold:  Motherhood…Middleage
I’m at a crossroads, no longer young, but not yet old.  The world around me appears to lose focus as boundaries and expectations are blurred.  What once was perfectly clear is now laced with questions.  The Universe is giving me a choice.  I watch in alarmed fascination as new paths open before me, each yellow brick road beckoning me,  “Come this way!”

The 50th Year
The Threshold:  Middleage…The Crone
I suddenly realize who I am, I mean the “me” that I must have lost along the way.  I suddenly realize that the only opinion that counts is my own.  I suddenly realize who my friends are and who they aren’t.  I suddenly realize that I am not afraid to face the world alone.  I suddenly realize that I have reached a plateau enabling me to scrutinize my past and glimpse my future.  I suddenly realize…I have arrived.

The 60th Year
The Threshold:  The Crone…The Golden Age
I’m at a crossroads, no longer middle-aged, but not yet old, not really, I say with defiance.  My body speaks to me now, still proud of its strength, its endurance.  My body speaks to me with relish, embracing the last blazing autumn of life.

The 70th Year
The Threshold:  The Golden Age…Old Age
I will reap what I have sown, whether this be children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, or the golden glow of accomplishments.  I will stop to smell the roses.  I will stop to watch the sunset.  I will stop to pet a dog, or hold a cat.  I will stop to speak to an old friend.  I will stop to say, “I love you.”; “Hello”; “Good-by”; and “I’m sorry.”

The 80th Year
The Threshold:  The Crone Glorified
I am elevated.  From this vantage point I stand in the stillness of dawn.  I stand in the midst of gentle rain on black earth.  I stand in the warmth of a loved one’s hand on my arm.  I stand, not in the shadow of The Crone, but shoulder to shoulder with her.  I am one with the goddess.

The 90th Year
The Threshold:  Rebirth
I look at the world and see it as hazy images in a crystal ball.  The images are people I’ve loved, places I’ve been, things I’ve done.  And as I stare at the images within this universal sphere, I can see that they are fading, getting dimmer, and soon they will disappear.  I know that as these images and this world are fading.  I know there is another beautiful glorious crystal ball, and within it I can see the sunrise bursting over the horizon, lighting the way for a new journey…in the next Life.

Tags: women, aging, culture, celebration

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Note ~ This post was originally published at my blog, Every Cat Has a Tale, November 2014

I am not an intellectual. I don't know why it's automatically assumed if someone likes to write that they are going to be incredibly intellectual and knowledgeable on all the hot topics of the politically correct present day.

I hate politics, of any kind. I'm the most non-political person that you're ever going to come across. I know, I know. I can already here the sighs and the wagging pointy fingers declaring that this is something I should be up on, something I should pay attention to, something I should be at least minimally involved in. (But I'm not.) It is the driest, most boring topic in the world, and I believe that the whole political system is akin to the public school system and parents: they want you to think that you have a say and some influence on a subject, but really-- you don't.

I love my spirituality and my magickal path, but I am not an expert on all the ancient and infinitely numerous pantheons, practices, or theologies. I'm not into the enthusiasm of people who want to historically dissect some tradition and then try to reconstruct it letter by letter, moment by moment, archaic rule by archaic rule, outdated practice by outdated practice. This is just too much detail for my weary little brain; and besides, this is not ancient times, and there will be better, more modern, more practical ways to practice an ancient path in the present day, a way that will build and expand spirituality and enhance our lives in the modern world.

I am not detail oriented. I hate reading long boring historical tomes on witchcraft, or the tarot, or anything actually. It makes me cringe when I turn to a page in any tarot book (including my first one) and read “...the tarot was used in Egypt 5000 years ago.” First, I'm not so sure that this is true, probably because I don't take the time to read all the numerous dry history books on the subject, the ones that probably contain a few facts and a multitude of theories. And honestly, this sounds awful, but I just don’t care. (I can hear a barely audible gasp.) Is this so awful? No, not really. Using one of my husband's favorite quotes: “It need not pertain.”...and it doesn't pertain, to me at least.

I've had a few rare occasions on a radio program where I was asked some incredibly detailed intellectual type question on a topic. I know that I have given them more than a few seconds of dead air time as I pause, thinking in blind panic-- Do they expect me to know this off the top of my head? Do they really expect me to carry on a long dialogue on this very complicated detailed intellectual academic topic? Are they kidding? Head's up peoples-- this is what Research Books are for.

(Apparently, I'm a Big Picture kinda' girl.)

I am not a seamstress.

I'm not necessarily a good cook, though my kids would tell you I am because they don't know any better.

I am not business oriented. Finances confuse me, and reading a tax document is like reading a foreign language.

I am not mechanical...hooking up the DVD machine is enough of a challenge for me, and there's only three options, all color coded-- red to red, white to white, yellow to yellow.

I am not always a good judge of character, and I'm empathic, you'd think I would be. I tend to be naive and trusting. I wouldn't lie and steal, or exaggerate; so I automatically assume no one else will either.

I'm not a good wife, at least I don't think I am. I'm like some crusty old bachelor who's set in his ways and gets all scowly if someone rearranges the pantry. I like my space, and I don't want someone else's fingerprints all over it.

I am not good at remembering things-- Lots of things! Some people might think I'm rude when I forget to answer their messages, but I have a good reason...I just forgot that you sent me one! I make lists all the time: notes to myself about things to do for the day, notes about writing projects, notes about phone calls, notes about Very-Important-Business-Emails that can't be ignored; notes about what to do the next day...ad infinitum.

I am not a party girl. (Libra likes peace and quiet.)

I am not a team player. (Think tarot card: The Hermit)

I am not a good gardener...I grow fond of all growing things, and some of the growing things in my garden I grow fond of turn out to be weeds, and I haven't got the heart to pull them out, or cut them down. Houseplants-- forget it. I have a black thumb with houseplants, and the smart ones commit suicide before I ever get them home to re-pot.

As you can see, I'm not a lot of things.

Tags: diary, blogging, personal, reflection,

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Hello to all my Zodiacs!  The following tarot reads are quick n’ fast one card pulls with a flash of insight. (Kind of like the horoscope briefs you’ll find in the newspaper.)  If you want a longer, in-depth, personal reading You Know Where to Find Me!  I’m using Pagans Way Tarot for these mini-readings, by Anna Franklin.

Aquarius ~ Temperance
Some Aquarians are going to be set free, free from unnecessary strife and worry; from unnecessary responsibility; free from whatever is adding an extra burden to your life through your own unique set of circumstances.  It’s time to find balance in your life.  Those things that disrupt balance will be smoothed out; those things will be eliminated; those things will be solved.  Aquarius, your path will go from bumpy, impaired, and pot-holed, to smooth and unencumbered.

Capricorn ~ 6/Wands
It’s time to win, Capricorn, time to be the victor.  This is your chance to grab the golden ring and taste the sweet taste of successful accomplishment.  If you’ve been working hard towards a specific goal, you will reach this milestone very soon with glorious results.  If you’ve been plodding away at everyday mundane life consistently and responsibly, you’re going to receive an acknowledgment for your efforts, your stamina, and your dedication.

Pisces ~ Knight/Wands
You’re in for some high adventure that’s going to come at you unexpectedly and at a rather fast pace, so hang onto your hats, Pisces!  If this is an individual in your life, or a new connection, you’re going to find their enthusiasm and pace for life rather difficult to keep up with at times.  Since they are the spontaneous “action-before-thought” type of person, you dear Pisces are going to have to be the level-headed one.  However, don’t resist the pull to adventure that this Knight brings; it will pull you out of your rut and bring you new and satisfying experiences.

Aries ~ 3/Swords (reversed)
Dear Aries, you suffer from a broken heart so often, whether it be with a romantic partner, or other keenly felt disappointments in life.  Did you ever wonder if it’s you who’s setting yourself up for these disappointments?  Sometimes you ask too much, and sometimes you accept too little, from other people.  Turn the tables, be decisive (which is difficult for some of you).  You have the ability to turn this around, put this card upright by sticking to your guns and more closely examining motives…both yours as well as someone else’s.

Taurus ~ Strength
The universe has big plans for some of you, and the course that this is taking you on will require strength, stamina, determination, and faith.  Know that you are not alone.  Your spirit guide or animal totems are surrounding you, protecting you, lending you their energy.  You will come through, perhaps not entirely unscathed, but wiser and stronger for the experience.  Embrace what the universe sends you, even when it appears challenging, this is how you’re going to grow, Taurus.

Gemini ~ Ace/Cups
Aces are doorways, Gemini, and the cups leads to relationships, romance, new people, or a very special person in your life.  For single Gemini’s, expect someone new and interesting to cross your path.  Married Gemini’s, you’re going to experience your committed relationship on a new level; you’re going to find yourself in a place that moves to a new and deeper stage mentally, spiritually, and physically; you’re going to feel very grateful for this connection in your life and you’ll be able to see it from a new perspective with new eyes.  Your cup runneth over.

Cancer ~ The Lady
Cancers, Mother Nature and her glorious fertile world are going to make a unique connection with you this year.  Communication is highlighted; coupling; birth; re-birth; and renewal are in the picture, whether this is signifying a physical fertility and the birth of a child, or creative fertility and the birth of new ideas and new projects.  Your world will flourish with abundance, rich and earth-based.

Leo ~ 6/Wands (reversed)
Leo, you may have been on a losing streak lately, but that’s all going to change; you can turn it around.  Examine what’s been causing this string of bad luck:  personal decisions; the individuals you’re connecting with; some other cause unique to your own situation??  Find the rotten apple, the thorn in your side, then get rid of it.  I have a feeling some of you Leo’s will be taken by surprise with this revelation, not all who come to us in the guise of “friend” are sincere and genuine.  And then, you’re also going to have to check on one more possiblity… Is it YOU that’s holding yourself back?

Virgo ~ 9/Pentacles
You’re not quite satisfied, Virgos!  Our life is one long search for happiness and perfection, for contentment and success.  A lot of you Virgos feel that you’re missing the mark, it’s that “almost there” feeling, but something seems to be absent.  It might be your desire for perfectionism that leaves you feeling this way.  You’ve got a great life; you’ve done, been, and experienced about everything you’ve wished; you have all the things other people may envy you for:  a good mate; a good job; the setting that you desire to live in; extra-curricular activities that hum with your energy.  Learn to appreciate where you’re at Right This Moment, enjoy what you’ve attained– stop worrying about acquiring more!

Libra ~ Elder
There’s going to be some new growth and insights for many Libras.  Aha-light-bulb moments are going to be going off creating a spectacular light show with all the Libras out there who will be picking up new knowledge, understanding, and insights.  Wisdom is coming your way, Libra.  Questions will be answered, problems solved, something you may have wondered about for a long time will finally find the light of revelation shining upon it.  Grab this knowledge and run with it…knowledge is power, as the old saying goes.

Scorpio ~ Princess/cups
Messages coming through for Scorpio will be focused on love and relationships.  Some of you Scorpios may find yourself riding off into the sunset, either with a fairy tale happy ending golden glow; or with a let’s get out of here and start over spirit of adventure.  This princess is going to be persistent. Some Scorpios out there are overlooking something wonderful that’s right under their nose.  Look at the options and opportunities around you before you get the wild itch to take off to yonder parts trying to find love, or fulfillment, opportunities, or success.  It’s closer than you think, Scorpio.  (If it were a snake, it would of bit you, as my grandmother would say.)

Sagittarius ~ Justice (reversed)
No, life isn’t always fair, Sagittarius, and this is a fact.  But don’t get so caught up in the injustice of it all that you stop trying, stop fighting, stop stepping up to the plate.  Sometimes life deals us some tricky cards (no pun intended) and we have to face what’s on the table.  Some of you may either find yourself dealing with personal issues that seem unfair, unjust, or just plain cruel; and others will actually find yourself interacting with the legal system, or attorneys, to take care of upcoming issues.  Hang in there, Sagittarius, Lady Justice will triumph in the end.

Tags: tarot, tarot readings, zodiac tarot readings, astrology,

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Purple ~ Dictionary Definition

pur·ple
 (pûr′pÉ™l)

tr. & intr.v. pur·pled, pur·pling, pur·ples

To make or become purple.

 

Purple ~ Magickal Energies

Purple is the color of royalty, charm, meditation, idealism, divination, progress, justice, mysticism, devotion, clairvoyance, luck, accomplishment and religion. In magick, purple is employed for protection, power, legal matters, divination, progress, the breaking of bad luck, the access of higher realms, driving away evil, to stop gossip or lies, material wealth, spirit contact and to enhance spiritual and psychic powers.

Purple is the color of your crown chakra, connecting you to Divinity and your Higher Self.

 

I lost my purple somewhere along the way.  For the past three years I was the main driving force keeping a life-long drug addict straight.  The longer we were together, the more my own interests and activities slipped into the background.  Pretty soon, they were non-existent.  And the "me" that was ME was replaced with another persona; this one focused on doctors, and appointments, and bills, and pills. 

I became something far beyond a spouse and partner, something I'm not sure I ever should have been.  I became the gate-keeper, the nurse, the disciplinarian, and the Keeper-Of-The-Pills.  I became responsible for all those things in my husband's life that my husband should have been responsible for himself.  And along the way, I lost my purple.

When you lose your purple, you don't realize you're losing it right away.  It fades gradually, eventually disappearing all together.  It suddenly dawns on you, unexpectedly, triggered by an event, a disappointment, a confrontation, exasperation, desperation, or exhaustion.  You abruptly raise your head above the dark grim focused world you've been immersed in; you look around; and you are acutely aware of the poisonous negative energy surrounding you.  You are shockingly aware of the absence of your purple.  It was a stark, clarifying, defining moment for me.

You suddenly have to ask yourself, "How much of "Me" am I willing to sacrifice for this person?"...a season?  a life time?  "What am I willing to sacrifice for this person?"...all other personal relationships?  financial security?  peace of mind?  It's a somber moment of introspection.

You realize, in the back of your mind, that this needy unpredictable troubled individual may not survive without your discipline, your determination, your strength.  You have to reach a moment, a heartbreaking illuminating moment, when you finally say..."Me first."

You have to reach a primal raw wild place in your soul, where the idea of self-preservation resides.  Only when you arrive at this point where you care about yourself and your future more than you care about someone else's destiny, can you turn a magickal corner.

Once this happens...it's time to find your purple.

Tags: family, relationships, care giver, marriage, self-exploration, self-discove

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I’ve had 5 mothers-in-law in my lifetime, and although one or two of these relationships were rather toxic, I still learned something from each and every one of them.  I believe that people come into our lives at a certain time and for a particular reason, and we are meant to make a connection.  At my personal blog (as opposed to my witchy, booky, blog), I’ve recorded a post for each woman and a reflection of exactly what it is that I learned from her:

Mother-in-law #1

http://everycathasatale.blogspot.com/2015/09/mothers-in-law-what-ive-learned-from.html

Mother-in-law #2

http://everycathasatale.blogspot.com/2015/10/mothers-in-law-what-ive-learned-from.html

Mother-in-law #3

http://everycathasatale.blogspot.com/2015/11/mothers-in-law-what-ive-learned-from.html

Mother-in-law #4

http://everycathasatale.blogspot.com/2016/01/mothers-in-law-what-ive-learned-from.html

Mother-in-law #5

http://everycathasatale.blogspot.com/2016/03/mothers-in-law-what-ive-learned-from.html

Tags: family, relationships, inlaws,marriage, mothers,

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