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My son was married on Valentine's Day. I am posting my blog from The Corner 4 Women for that day. I will be putting the video on my page, so you are all invited to a wedding!
These are my thoughts as the baby got married.....
Well my darlings, my son is married. This is my baby. I have a daughter in law. This is a big responsibility, as I don't want to be one of "those" mothers-in-law. I get along very well with my son-in-law and I call him my "baby boy." I do hope that I have the same close relationship with Leila and that she grows to consider me a friend.
Frank and Leila got married on Valentine's Day, February 14th. This was a very emotional day for me. First my son is getting married and he is my baby. Now, that should be enough emotion for one day, but no, there was more. Unexpectedly, one of the residents at Timberlawn passed away. I found out the day before and I was truly mourning him. Ronnie Garrett. He had been ill for quite a long time and we knew he was failing, but you always hold on to that hope. They were the other couple that got married last May, so they hadn't been married a year. What deeply touched me was that Ronnie gave Florene her Valentine's Day present on February 10th. Why would he do that? Because somewhere he knew he wouldn't be here on February 14th. I come across this same scenario so many times.
Leila is from the Phillipines. I recently read somewhere that one out of eight marriages is from meeting on the internet. I don't remember if it was in the world or in the United States. Anyway, this falls under an internet romance marriage. Frank fell in love with Leila the moment he met her on the internet when he lived with me back in California. He said, "Mom, look at the girl I'm talking to, isn't she beautiful?" And yes, she is stunning. He talked to her every single day and in January, 2006 started to make arrangements to bring her over to the United States so they could marry. Hmmm..... May be it was later than that. She arrived here in January of this year. Well, she came on a fiance visa so they had to get married in 90 days. They got married in the courthouse and my daughter and friends took part in the occasion. With my business right now, I did not have the funds to go. So, being highly charged emotionally over the wedding to begin with and then having to go to Ronnie's viewing, by the time I was in the supermarket shopping, I found myself crying while I was walking down the aisle. Only this was a supermarket aisle. Veronica kept sending me pictures on my cellphone, so I was there through technology. You know, I live way out in the country, and lately I have been hearing a lot of planes flying over my house. What's up with that? This one sounded like it was flying rather low. Okay, this is a sidenote.
And then they were in line at the courthouse ready to be married. By now, I had already seen Ronnie and hugged and talked to his wife and daughters. I felt like crap. And I was receiving the pictures showing the preparation for the wedding, further emotionally charging me. Phone calls back and forth throughout the day, so wishing I could have been there. Then add to that that I felt like the loser mom of a lifetime for not being at my son's wedding. Then, I spoke to my son again and he was in line. He said, "Only three people in front of us!" My baby was just minutes from being a married man. Then I called Veronica a little bit later, I don't remember the reason. And I got her voicemail. I left a message...... "Frank is getting married right now, isn't he?" And I sighed almost as if my soul had been transported to the courtroom and part of me was there with him, experiencing this once in a lifetime very special moment. A little while later, my daughter called and said, "Mom, talk to Mr. and Mrs. Frank Johnette." Now I'm in the supermarket and with those words, the tears flowed. I spoke to my son, and then I spoke to my daughter in law. Then I hung up and through blurry eyes tried to make my way down the aisels. When I got home, he pointed me to his My Space and I saw the video of the wedding. More tears. There was my baby, my little boy, saying...... "I Frank take you Leila......" And as I write this, there are more tears. I wanted to place the video on this blog for you to watch, but I don't know how, so the pictures above will have to suffice.
There has been a lot of other drama in my life, keeping me emotionally charged. I almost lost it at one point, but no. I held it together and I believe everything has turned out fine. Or much better anyway. Then, I have been terribly busy with Dipetane. I have one more school district testing it. I have been out of the house all week. It is quite unusual that I be out of the house all week like this, but one thing led to another. And then you get behind in other things. That's when I usually tend to become overwhelmed. But not this time. I thought to myself, "Calm down. One thing at a time."
I am also getting together my Right Choices 4 Life Program. Again, every time I feel I am ready to start, something gets in the way. However, it is always to my benefit. During these times, something that will enhance the program pops up and just the other day, I met someone in Victorville, California that will be starting a chapter of Right Choices 4 Life there. Awesome! And I still have more ideas of one person that I need to ask. We will all have to get together in a conference room to be on the same page and start our program off, with maybe regular meetings or some type of communication. As when one of us comes across something that will benefit our program, we need to share it with the others.
And yes, I have realized that this will add one more thing to my plate, but this is very important and the more I think about it and prepare, the more I know that it must be done.
And now my friends, I am going to cook a dish for a potluck I am going to a little later. It looks wonderful! and healthy for you too!
Oh! As I'm going to get the recipe for you I came across something and it reminded me of a very important tip. Do not use any lipsticks that state that they will last all day on your lips. They countain cancer causing chemicals.
ROASTED PORTOBELLO AND PROSCIUTTO LASAGNA
Get the most out of every ingredient by layering flavors. Roasting portobello mushrooms before adding them to the lasagna lends a meaty smokiness.
Filling
3 tablespoons plus 2 teaspoons olive oil
2 1/2 pounds (about 10) portobello mushrooms, stems trimmed 1 cup chopped prosciutto (about 6 ounces)
2/3 cup chopped shallots (about 2 large)1 teaspoon chopped fresh rosemary1 teaspoon chopped fresh thyme
Sauce
4 cups whole milk
1 14-ounce can low-salt chicken broth1 bay leaf
1/2 cup (1 stick) butter
2/3 cup all purpose flour
2 cups (about 8 ounces) shredded Gruyère cheese
1/3 cup grated Parmesan cheese 1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
Lasagna1 pound lasagna noodles
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
2 tablespoons butter, cut into 1/2-inch pieces
For filling:
Preheat oven to 400°F. Brush rimmed baking sheet with 1 tablespoon olive oil. Toss mushrooms with 2 tablespoons olive oil in large bowl to coat. Arrange mushrooms, gill side up, in single layer on prepared baking sheet. Sprinkle with salt and pepper. Roast until tender, about 45 minutes. Cool. Cut mushrooms into 1/3-inch-thick slices. Meanwhile, heat remaining 2 teaspoons oil in medium nonstick skillet over medium heat. Add prosciutto; sauté until browned, about 3 minutes. Add shallots, rosemary, and thyme. Cook until shallots are tender, stirring frequently, about 5 minutes. (Mushrooms and prosciutto-shallot mixture can be made 1 day ahead. Cover separately and chill). For sauce:Bring milk, broth, and bay leaf to simmer in heavy large saucepan over medium heat. Remove from heat. Let stand 10 minutes; discard bay leaf.
Melt butter in heavy medium saucepan over medium-low heat. Whisk in flour; stir 2 minutes. Whisk in hot milk mixture; bring to boil, whisking frequently. Reduce heat to low; simmer 5 minutes, stirring frequently. Remove from heat; stir in Gruyère, Parmesan, and nutmeg. Season to taste with salt and pepper.
For lasagna:
Cook noodles in large pot of boiling salted water until almost tender but slightly undercooked (noodles will finish cooking in oven). Drain and rinse with cold water. Drain again; pat dry.
Butter 13x9x2-inch glass baking dish. Spread 1 cup sauce over bottom of prepared dish. Arrange 1/3 of noodles over sauce, overlapping to fit. Spread about 1 2/3 cups sauce over noodles. Arrange 1/2 of mushrooms over sauce. Scatter 1/2 of prosciutto mixture over mushrooms. Arrange 1/2 of remaining noodles over mushrooms, overlapping to fit. Spread 1 2/3 cups sauce over noodles. Arrange remaining mushrooms over sauce, sprinkle with remaining prosciutto, and top with remaining noodles. Spread remaining sauce over noodles, sprinkle Parmesan cheese over, and dot with butter. (Can be made 1 day ahead. Cover and refrigerate.)
Preheat oven to 350°F. Bake lasagna until top is golden brown and sauce is bubbling, about 45 minutes (about 1 hour if refrigerated). Let stand 20 to 30 minutes before serving.
Makes 8 servings.
My dears, I must run. Yes, this is how I've been lately. Run here, run there. I must start cooking. It is already 1:30 pm.
Oh! For more recipes, please to go http://thecorner4women.com/Forum/
Also, please feel free to join our family and be part of our forum. I have more wonderful surprises up my sleeve.
Love to all,
Luella May
http://thecorner4women.com
http://thecorner4women.com/Forum/
http://dipetanesoutheast.com
Normally where I would be just leaving Magnolia Manor today, I find myself at home, loopy on pain pills. Actually, I just took one yesterday and I don't think the effects have worn off. Well, the dentist did not prescribe them. I had these leftover from other dentist visits and I keep them for situations such as this. The dentist just prescribed a lame cream that is supposed to numb the pain. Ummmm....... No. The cream says 3 times daily for mouth sores. I have the impulse to call him and let him know that this is a tad above a mouth sore. I wonder if it will work if I use the entire tube? Well probably for two minutes. It's not worth it.
Actually, I can't say that the pain pill worked either, unless without it I would have passed out from the pain. All it did was make me loopy and I have still not gotten rid of that loopy feeling. So all in all, it is better that I don't drive anywhere today.
What happened you ask? He was doing part two of my root canal yesterday morning. While he was drilling I felt as if I was drowning. That suction thing wasn't doing the entire job. So rather than drown, I decided to swallow. Well, my tongue got in his way and he drilled through it. I sprung up from the chair and now you can see the silhouette of my body, arms and legs outstretched on the ceiling of his office. I believe it should make an interesting conversation piece.
After tending to the new drama now taking place in his office, all sorts of assistants came in to help, how do you put a tourniquet on a tongue anyway? he told me that my tongue would be sore for a couple of days. Now, I should have known better, as when a dentist, doctor, nurse, janitor, or anybody in the medical profession says, you will just feel a just a pinch, or it will be sore for a couple of days, brace yourself. You are about to experience excrutiating pain.
So that is why I took the pain pill that really didn't help that much yesterday. I was pacing the house with both hands pressing on the sides of my face. ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch! Well, actually this is a good diet as it is impossible to eat anything. Even a dab of oatmeal causes me to screech, sounding like a sonic boom throughout these parts. Drinking something hot or warm is completely out of the question. Ice cold water is actually comforting. Those of us who must have coffee in the morning drank it a bit cool today. It was better than nothing. And actually, I am not in the least hungry. The thought of eating now brings on sheer panic.
The dentist says that the tongue heals very quickly. I'm waiting...... I now have a new found respect for those of you who have your tongues pierced. All I have to say is bless your hearts!
My dears, I will do some work now and take it easy if I get tired. Actually horrific pain does tend to sap all the energy out of you. Hopefully things will improve as the day progresses.
In the meantime my loves, talk soon!
Love to all,
Luella May
http://thecorner4women.com
http://thecorner4women.com/Forum/
http://dipetanesoutheast.com
I have been avoiding posting on this blog all day. I could only think of one thing. At 5:00 pm I would need to leave for the viewing of Mrs. Duke's body. Her death was actually quite remarkable and I think that is how I would like to leave this earth. Just being myself. No medicines, no treatments, just flow along until it is time.
The problem is that she leaves Mr. Duke, bless his heart. Married 65 years, he is in shock. The last time I saw him, he held me and begged, "Pray for Mama, she's my best friend." Tonight, as I saw him, oh and how I dreaded going to see him, I just hugged him, and he hugged me back. We held each other for the longest time. And then crying, he looked at me and said "Mama's gone." I hugged him again, he hugged me, again we held each other I looked at him and said, "I love you." He sat down, a broken man, not knowing what he would do next.
You see, Mr. Duke was the one that was failing rapidly. Mrs. Duke was the strong one. She is the one who would care for him, spent sleepless nights. She was his sole support his whole world. I don't think it has been quite a month, when all of a sudden Mrs. Duke became severly ill. She had a drastic mood change. In the hospital they found that she had cancer that had spread all over her body and now it had gone to her brain. I will say, she was beautiful till the end. She really didn't have the suffering and loss of weight that goes along with cancer. She just suffered from the dreadful headaches, mood changes and loss of memory at the very end. But not every day, there were days that she looked absolutely fine. And I would think, she's going to be all right, look how well she looks. But it was not to be. She never knew she had cancer. Her children moved Mr. and Mrs. Duke into a nursing home after she was released from the hospital. No, not Magnolia Manor or Timberlawn, another one.
The moment of her death was actually beautiful. Her son was by her bedside. She asked him to tell grandma to come get her. Her son asked if that is what she really wanted. She said, yes, "Is that all right with you?" He said, yes mama, I want whatever will make you happy. And having the permission she needed, she expired, leaving her body I'm sure as her mom took her by the hand leading her to her new life.
When I left the viewing, I went to say goodbye to Mr. Duke. He looked lost. His face was red from crying. He was sitting down, and I just reached down and hugged him. I put my face next to his and I whispered, "I love you." We clasped hands, looked into each other's eyes, and I said I would see him tomorrow.
I went shopping after that. Needed a couple of things. And then I bought the biggest Hershey's Milk Chocolate Bar you have ever seen. And I ate it on the way home, driving in the rain.
Mr. Duke will go back to the nursing home tonight. Alone. After the funeral tomorrow, his children will take him back to the nursing home. How I wish one of them would take him home. He needs family so badly now. Now I understand why some nursing home residents look dead. Because they really are, their life has gone by and they have nothing. Something needs to be done about this. Nursing homes should be as family homes and the staff should be as a caring mother. It is an honorable responsibility to take care of the elderly and it should not be taken lightly. Many of our seniors do go through neglect. Neglect is the same as abuse. I will have to make time to visit him.
Cassie and her family came in. She came to me and gave me a big hug and I returned the hug, as if she knew the pain I felt because of Elyse. She sat by me, stroked my hair and massaged my back. I felt so grateful. I put my head on her shoulder and hugged her again.
The funeral will be tomorrow at 2:00 pm. And then later that evening our church family will have a get together and see the new year come in. What is in store for the new year? Many wonderful things. But I still have things to work through. How I wish I had easy solutions. I need God to bail me out. But I must learn lessons. More lessons.
This year, I have made wonderful friends. I have lost one. No, not really, it has just taken a different turn. Mrs. Duke has gone to her new life, Mr. Duke will be alone in the nursing home, Elyse is off to bible college, and new kids are growing up and joining the youth group.
Tomorrow as the new year comes in, a door will close behind me and a new one will open in front of me. A new year, a new life.
Love to all,
Luella May
http://thecorner4women.com
http://thecorner4women.com/Forum/
http://dipetanesoutheast.com
Originally written on Christmas Eve
Hello My Darlings!
I wish you a Merry Christmas and a happy and prosperous new year.
I am entering this post now, as my emotions are fresh. Well, in that case, maybe I should wait a day or two. I am very sad and most hurt. I don't know where this post will lead. I may very well revert to childlike behavior and, if I do, I ask that you give me that privilege.
Tonight is the last time I saw Elyse for a very long time. She will be leaving for bible college on Wednesday morning. Yes, that is the good news and I am very happy about that. What has me on the verge of tears and maybe I should just break down and cry for a few hours and get it over with, is that she did not acknowledge me tonight.
This morning was most busy I was Miss Elf for the very last time this year and we had a wonderful party in junior church. I was up to very early this morning baking cookies and stuffing stockings. Yes, all 60 of them. We had a magnificent turn out and all the children were well behaved and had a wonderful time. I saw Elyse who I hugged and told how pretty she looked. I asked her if she would be at church tonight as I wanted to say goodbye. She said yes. I did not get an enthusiastic response at all. Actually, a bit of the cold shoulder. Let's see...... Have I done anything lately? I don't think so.
Then I went to juvenile hall. Guess what? They had no girl inmates. This was actually good news. I hated to see teens in jail on Christmas. However, then a man showed up at the same time to see the boys and the guard said, "Oh, they're plenty of those!" So I decided to do some errands before church started again. The service this evening was at 4:00 pm to accommodate those that were going away to see family. Before evening church I handed out my Christmas Cards. I was very late in getting them out this year. It was tonight or never. I saw Elyse come in. I rushed over to her and gave her her gift and a card with it. A beautiful sapphire bracelet. She showed absolutely no response. Then I said, "Don't leave after church, I have to say goodbye to you." And she said she wouldn't. After church I went to hug her goodbye. I felt as I was hugging a rock. She didn't thank me for the gift or the card. At this point, my chest got very heavy and I believe I plummeted into a depression. What had I done? She seemed happy and cheerful with everyone else. I hugged her and told her that I would miss her, that this was the beginning of a bright future for her. And then I let her go and watched as she walked away.
I had asked her for her address a couple of weeks ago so I could write to her. But something told me, nah! let it go. I gathered my things and came home. I was exhausted from the day. I made myself a fat old turkey sandwich and then plopped on the bed, clothes and all and just let go of every muscle in my body as I drifted off to sleep for a couple of hours. I was vaguely aware of Misty jumping up on the bed next to me. I woke up just a little while ago and put up my weekly Women of Courage Forum http://community.adlandpro.com/forums/thread/551946.aspx and then decided while my heart was still freshly broken, I would pull in and visit with you for a little while this Christmas Eve.
I have been so terribly busy this Christmas, I think I know how Santa feels after Christmas is over. Exhausted, he makes his way for his favorite easy chair and as he relaxes the elves bring him a nice cup of hot tea while other elves give him a wonderful foot massage. Aaaaaaah! Where are those elves? Oh, I forgot. I AM an elf.
My dears, I will leave you now. I wish you all the best Christmas ever and a very happy new year. If you find yourself alone this Christmas, just relax and enjoy the day. After all, Christmas is really not about presents, the parties, and so on. You possess Christmas all year long. It really is in your heart.
Love to all,
Luella May
http://thecorner4women.com
http://thecorner4women.com/Forum/
http://dipetanesoutheast.com
Well, I did it. Today was the appointed day to sing O Holy Night. I got through the song fine. I didn't make one mistake. The piano player did but that's okay. And her mistake didn't throw me off. Awesome!
Last year I did make a mistake. Actually, I remember losing a note somewhere and trying to find it in front of everybody. And then, as I was stepping down from the altar, my shoe got caught in the rug and I went flying down to the floor. Out of reflex I put both my arms out to stop myself. Actually, what I think I was really doing was attempting desperately to fly, as I didn't want to come in contact with the floor below. Flying didn't work. When I hit bottom I had broken and dislocated my shoulder on my left arm. Needless to say, the service was totally disrupted as my screaming made any other activity impossible. I can say that my arm is almost healed. I still feel a pull on my shoulder when I raise my arm. It took quite a few months to even gain use of my hand.
And here we are a year later, singing that old familiar song at this Christmas time. Singing O Holy Night has become a tradition for me. The children will never let me live that down. All decorum was lost that night. They saw the real Ms. May. They remembered too. Sunday they came running to me saying don't sing that song on Wednesday! Guess they didn't like that Grand Finale. I did learn to watch my step from that dreadful experience. Sometimes I may be a little too careful. However, I lived through that horrendous experience, I'm not sure I could live through it again. That was the kind of pain that you just pray that you go unconscious so you don't have to experience it.
The Christmas Season is upon us. My Christmas this year is going to be very quiet. I have baked tons of cookies for other people but I'm not sure I'll even cook this Christmas. You can say I am celebrating my Christmas now, baking cookies, giving gifts and oh yes! This Christmas I start a new tradition. Tomorrow I will be Santa's elf at Magnolia Manor. Not a sexy elf mind you, this is an old folks home. But I think I will be a cute elf anyway.
I was actually supposed to start my elf career last Thursday but an unexpected death pre-empted that performance. A very close business associate's mother passed away and I really did need to be at that funeral. However, I will also don my elf costume for the Bus Kid's Christmas Party. I might enjoy being an elf. Now, here is something rather interesting. If you look up the name Luella, the meaning is elf. That seems too close of a coincidence. That was quite a disappointment. You look up the meaning of your name and you expect to find a valiant or romantic definition. And then you find elf. What?
I am calmer today my darlings. Taking things in stride. This Christmas season is very busy but starting in the new year, I stand to gain more school districts as customers and it may get downright hectic. So I need to get a grip. I have been working hard on it, but you know how it is, if you wind yourself up tight enough it takes a while to come down to normal. No, I will no longer expect to perform as my parents expected me to. I think somewhere along the line I pictured myself yearning for my dad's approval all over again. Sounds silly doesn't it. Well, it made me very, very anxious. A part of me wants to say, "Look dad! Look at me! I have a business and it's working! I want you to be proud of me!" Maybe he is somewhere looking on proud of me. And then again, maybe not. I do know that when going through the next life, I never want to run into him again. May it truly be a thing of the past. I must choose my next life and the players very carefully. Keep on this positive streak. By positive streak I don't necessarily mean successful streak, I mean "positive streak." One can be positive no matter what life deals them. But it is the positive ones that make lemonade out of lemons. Hopefully I have learned that lesson for the rest of eternity. Oh, how I hate heartbreak and suffering. You know the kind that makes you think your world has caved in and that you will never find someone to love again. I never, ever want to experience that again.
My dears, I must go on to do some work. Yes, at this late hour. Let's see I plan to go until midnight unless I start to fade earlier.
Love chatting with you. I will drop in tomorrow.
Lots of love,
Luella May
http://thecorner4women.com
http://thecorner4women.com/Forum/
http://dipetanesoutheast.com
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