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In 2001, I began writing a column for a weekly newspaper in Fulton County, Arkansas. When I first started, I tried to do mostly humor items and won several awards for humor columns by the Arkansas Press Association.

 

But after about two dozen columns, the editor refused to publish the following column submission, which she deemed to be offensive to the citizens of Fulton County. I replaced it with another piece and life went on, never missing a weekly column until I walked away from doing them in the fall of 2007.

 

Since I am no longer employed by the newspaper, I present the forbidden item here. I seriously doubt if many will be offended by it -- if so, I suggest switching to decaf or perhaps some psychological therapy.

 

ACRONYMS OF FULTON COUNTY

 

Arkansas has many towns with descriptive names such as Little Rock, Pine Bluff, Hot Springs, Eureka Springs, Mountain View, Mountain Home, Lake Village, Lake City, Pleasant Plains, Walnut Ridge, Black Rock and so on. The names are indicative of a prominent feature of the surrounding area.

 

Sharp County has its share of such places.

 

1) Ash Flat – A flat area containing lots of ashes

2) Cave City – A cave within an area populated by cave people

3) Evening Shade – A town with lots of shade trees blocking the late afternoon sun

4) Hidden Valley – A community in a hard-to-find valley

5) Cherokee Village – A village established along the Cherokee Nation Trail of Tears with simple street names like Tonganoxie, Pottawattamie, Monongahela and Choctawhatchee

6) Ozark Acres – Acreage in the Ozark Mountains, or close to the Ozark Mountains, depending on whether you’re a seller or a buyer

 

Izard County also has many towns with descriptive names.

 

1) Violet Hill – A hill with violets

2) Calico Rock – An area of rock formations that are calico in appearance, predominantly white with dark patches

3) Horseshoe Bend – A community along a river that makes a curve in the shape of a horseshoe where lots of retired horseshoe players reside

4) Mt Pleasant – A high knob giving off pleasant vibes

5) Pleasant Valley – A hole in the ground giving off pleasant vibes

6) Lone Star – A spot reserved for Arkansas’ lone movie star, Billy Bob Thornton, when he gets expelled from show business

 

With the exception of Mammoth Spring, Fulton County has no such descriptive names. Mammoth Spring is a community built alongside a large spring of water oozing out of the ground. At first, they were going to call it Big Ooze, but that was soon scrapped because the high school didn’t want their sport’s teams to be known as the Big Oozers and the Lady Big Oozers. Apparently, it had something to do with teen-age angst. After a few more suggestions, like Large Leak, Wondrous Waterspout, Giant Gusher, and Stupendous Seepage, they settled on Mammoth Spring.

 

Legend has it that Fulton County wanted to be descriptive with their other township names too, but didn’t want to spend much money on paint for their town signs. The citizens of Fulton County are very practical and frugal, otherwise known as cheap. So they held a secret meeting and potluck dinner on the banks of the South Fork River, where they decided to give each town an acronym that would best describe it -- short, yet descriptive, names.

 

An acronym is a word formed from the initial letter of each part of the compound term.

 

For example, USA in an acronym for the United States of America, FBI is an acronym for the Federal Bureau of Investigation and SOS is an acronym for Something On a Shingle.

 

Some of the Fulton County acronyms are:

 

SALEM – Site All Law Enforcers Meet

VIOLA – Very Interesting Odd Little Area

AGNOS – Another Good Neighborhood Outside of Salem

GEPP – Gently Elevated Peculiar Place

CAMP – Concentrated Area of Municipal Parking

MOKO – Mostly Old Knobby Oaks

HEART – Hilly Earth Area of Removed Trees

UNION – Unobstructed Neighbors Inhabit Outhouses Nightly

BYRON – Back Yonder Right Over Nearby

 

I live in Fulton County in the township of Fairview. It seems like the perfect place for someone like me.

 

FAIRVIEW – For Annoying Individuals Requiring Very Intense Evaluation Weekly

 

In fact, I’m so annoying I may actually be mayor by default.

___________

 

Quote for the Day -- "Cities force growth, and make men talkative and entertaining, but they make them artificial." Ralph Waldo Emerson

___________

 

Bret Burquest is the author of 9 books. He lives in the Ozark Mountains with a dog named Buddy Lee and where political correctness is in the eye of the beholder.

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The number 3 represents the trinity of life -- body, mind, soul.

 

March third is the 3rd day of the 3rd month -- 3/3. The following events occurred in March 3 in the following years.

 

1805 -- The Louisiana-Missouri Territory was formed.

 

1820 -- Congress passed the Missouri Compromise which allowed Missouri to enter the Union as a slave state and Maine to enter as a free state.

 

1843 -- Congress authorized funds to test the practicality of an electro-magnetic telegraph system.

 

1845 -- Congress passed legislation by overriding the president's veto, for the first time.

 

1845 -- Florida became the 27th state.

 

1847 -- The U.S. Post Office was authorized to issue postage stamps.

 

1853 -- Congress authorized a survey for a transcontinental railroad.

 

1857-- Britain and France declared war on China.

 

1863 -- President Abraham Lincoln signed the Conscription Act compelling citizens to report for Civil War duty or pay $300 to be exempt from service, causing draft riots in New York.

 

1871 -- Congress passes the Indian Appropriation Act making Native Americans wards of the U.S. Government.

 

1871 -- Congress established the Civil Service system.

 

1875 -- The first hockey game took place, in Montreal.

 

1905 -- Under President Theodore Roosevelt, the U.S. Forest Service was formed.

 

1915 -- The film "Birth of a Nation" debuted in New York City.

 

1919 -- The U.S. Supreme Court ruled that falsely shouting "Fire" in a crowded theater was not protected as free speech in the 1st amendment in the Constitution.

 

1931 -- President Herbert Hoover signed a bill making "The Star-Spangled Banner" the national anthem of the USA.

 

1933 -- Mount Rushmore was dedicated.

 

1934 -- Criminal John Dillinger escaped from jail in Indiana.

 

1943 -- The USA defeated Japan in the Battle of Bismarck Sea.

 

1945 -- The U.S. 7th Army occupied the last part of Germany.

 

1959 -- The first U.S. probe, Pioneer 4, to enter solar orbit was launched.

 

1965 -- The USA performed a nuclear test in Nevada -- the USSR performed a nuclear test in Eastern Kazakhstan.

 

1968 -- The Tet Offensive in Hue, South Vietnam ended.

 

1969 -- Sirhan Sirhan testified in court that he had killed Robert Kennedy.

 

1978 -- The remains of comedian Charlie Chaplin were stolen from his grave in Switzerland.

 

1991 -- Los Angeles police brutally arrested Rodney King after an 8-mile chase, sparking violent riots in Los Angeles.

 

1992 -- President George H. W. Bush apologized for raising taxes after pledging not to -- "read my lips, no new taxes."

 

1999 -- Monica Lewinsky was interview by Barbara Walters concerning her relationship with President Clinton.

 

2003 -- President George W. Bush offered a plan for adding drug benefits to Medicare.

 

2008 -- The U.N. Security Council imposed another round of sanctions against Iran for refusing to suspend the enrichment of uranium.

 

2011 -- President Barack Obama and Mexican President Felipe Calderon met to discuss a drug war alliance.

 

2013 -- On March 3, 2013, my brother Dr. James W. Burquest was married for the 3rd time. He was born on March 3, many moons ago. Ironically, his new wife was also born on March 3. A wedding anniversary and 2 birthdays all on the same day -- an efficient gambit to eliminate extra shopping days -- well done.

 

There are 3 kinds of people -- those who can count and those who can't.

 

Beware the Ides of March.

___________

 

Quote for the Day -- "I have just 3 things to teach -- simplicity, patience, compassion." Lao Tzu

___________

 

Bret Burquest is the author of 9 books. He lives in the Ozark Mountains with a dog named Buddy Lee and where three is a crowd.

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While attending flight school in early 2001, Zacarias Moussaoui sought instruction on how to steer an airplane but had no interest in taking off or landing the thing. This led to his detainment by authorities, causing him to miss a plane flight on September 11, 2001, where he was to be the 20^th terrorist on that fateful day.

 

Moussaoui was subsequently indicted by a federal grand jury on six counts of conspiracy, including intent to murder and intent to use weapons of mass destruction. Four of the counts are punishable by death. At first, Moussaoui refused to make a plea. Later he pleaded guilty, stating he wanted avoid the death penalty because his religion specifically forbids suicide. The judge refused to accept the plea.

 

QUESTIONS -- If Moussaoui’s religion strictly forbids suicide, why hijack an airplane to kill lots of people, including himself? And if his objective is to kill as many infidels as possible before expiring in the effort, thereby being rewarded with eternity in heaven in the company of 70 virgins, why be concerned with his own mortality?

 

ANSWER -- Perhaps Moussaoui and his associates weren’t honorable soldiers in a grand crusade after all. Perhaps they were just a bunch of crazy jerks.

 

Recently, a New York City lawyer has filed suit against McDonald’s, Burger King, Wendy’s and Kentucky Fried Chicken Corporation. Apparently, he has a client with a fondness for fast foods who has become obese with the resulting high blood pressure and high cholesterol.

 

QUESTION – What do you have when you bury a bunch of lawyers up to their necks in sand?

 

ANSWER – Not enough sand.

 

On July 26, 2002, CNN News reported that several witnesses in the Washington DC area saw bright orange and blue lights in the sky. The news announcer went on to say that two F-16s were scrambled out of nearby Andrews Air Force but the unidentified objects disappeared before the planes could intercept them and mysteriously vanished from radar. Then the announcer added, with a smirk on his face, that there were no sightings of little green men.

 

QUESTION – Is it possible for intelligent life to exist elsewhere in the universe?

 

ANSWER -- If you divide all the known stars (suns) in the known universe equally among all the human beings living on Earth, there would be three trillion stars per person. And if only one in a million of these potential solar systems had just one planet with intelligent life, similar to our solar system, there would be approximately 20,000,000,000,000,000 planets with intelligent life in our universe. If there is no intelligent life elsewhere, an awful lot of planetary bodies are going to waste. He who smirks at the unknown is a fool.

 

President George Bush once had a private screening of the movie GOLDMEMBER and claimed it was one of the best movies he had ever seen. During a TV interview with Barbara Walters during his presidency, Bill Clinton stated that NAKED GUN was his all-time favorite movie. Both of these films were made to target junior high school boys who are easily amused by buxom babes and bathroom humor.

 

QUESTION – Why do we keep electing these immature man-boys to be our leader?

 

ANSWER – Because immature people need leaders and tend to elect one of their own.

___________

 

Quote for the Day – “Learn from the mistakes of others – you can never live long enough to make them all yourself.” Groucho Marx

___________

 

Bret Burquest is the author of 9 books. He lives in the Ozark Mountains with a dog named Buddy Lee and usually has more questions than answers.

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February 14 is Valentine's Day.

 

According to legend, Valentine was a Roman priest during the third century. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he decreed that young men were forbidden to get married.

 

However, Valentine defied the ruling and continued to perform marriages of young couples in secret. His actions were eventually discovered compelling Claudius to order the priest's death.

 

While in prison awaiting death, Valentine fell in love with a young woman, believed to be the jailer's daughter, who visited him regularly. Before his execution, it is alleged that Valentine wrote the young woman a note which he signed "from your Valentine."

 

Thus, Valentine was put to death and Valentine's Day was born.

 

When I first started dating my ex-wife it never occurred to me to get her anything on Valentine's Day. She spent the next several weeks in a huff. On our second Valentine's Day together, I gave her a nice piece of jewelry and she gave me an oven mitt.

 

Needless to say, I never did figure her out. We were married the following year and divorced five years later. She got the house and I got to keep the oven mitt.

 

On Valentine's Day, or any other day, a woman may ask a seemingly innocent question. A correct answer will usually lead to temporary approval, at least until the next seemingly innocent question. But any dimwitted answer, of which there are many, will surely bring about long-term torment.

 

Question: "Do you love me?"

A) "I guess so."

B) "In what sense?"

C) "Most of the time."

D) "Who, me?"

X) Correct answer -- "Of course, dear."

 

Question: "What are you thinking about?"

A) "Football."

B) "My dog."

C) "I was wondering when the next Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition was going to be available."

D) "If I wanted you to know, I'd be talking instead of thinking."

X) Correct answer -- "I was just thinking about what a wonderful, kind, thoughtful, intelligent, beautiful woman you are and what a lucky guy I am to be with you."

 

Question: "Do you think she's prettier than me?"

A) "You have a much better personality."

B) "Only from a certain angle."

C) "It's hard to say."

D) "She's just younger and thinner."

X) Correct answer -- "Absolutely not, dear."

 

Question: "Do I look fat in this dress?"

A) "I wouldn't exactly call it fat – I'd call it more like pleasantly plump."

B) "Nobody will notice."

C) "Compared to what?"

D) "Don't worry about it – a little extra weight looks good on you."

X) Correct answer -- "No, of course not, darling."

 

The key to a blissful relationship is sincerity.  If you can fake sincerity, your relationship will endure.

 

___________

 

Quote for the Day – "Love makes your soul crawl out of its hiding place." Zora Neale Hurston

 

___________

 

Bret Burquest is a former award-winning columnist and the author of nine books. He lives alone in the Ozark Mountains with a dog named Buddy Lee and an oven mitt.

___________

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The following events took place in 1963.

 

Jan 2 – Viet Cong downed 5 U.S. helicopters, killing 30 U.S. soldiers.

 

Jan 11 – The first discotheque, Whiskey-a-go-go, opened in Los Angeles.

 

Jan 14 – George Wallace was sworn in as Governor of Alabama, vowing “segregation forever.”

 

Feb 6 – USSR offensive military weapons are no longer in Cuba.

 

Mar 21 – Alcatraz Prison closed for good, on the orders of Attorney General Robert Kennedy.

 

Mar 31 – Streetcar service in Los Angeles ended after 90 years.

 

Apr 2 – Martin Luther King initiated the first non-violent civil rights in Birmingham, Alabama.

 

Apr 8 – At the Academy Awards, Lawrence of Arabia won Best Picture, Anne Bancroft won Best Actress and Gregory Peck won Best Actor.

 

Apr 10 – The USS Thresher, nuclear submarine, failed to surface 220 miles east of Boston, killing 129 sailors.

 

Apr 12 – Police used cattle prods and dogs on peaceful demonstrators in Birmingham, Alabama.

 

May 8—President John F. Kennedy offered assistance against aggression to Israel.

 

May 15—Autronaut Gordon Cooper orbited the Earth 22 times aboard Faith 7 and manually piloted the craft to a pinpoint splashdown landing.

 

May 20 – A cyclone in East Pakistan killed 22,000 people along the coast of the Bay of Bengal.

 

Jun 3 – Pope John XXIII died at age 81, succeeded by Pope Paul VI.

 

Jun 7 – The Rolling Stones made their first TV appearance.

 

Jun 11 – Martin Luther King was arrested in Florida while attempting to integrate restaurants.

 

Jun 11 – Federal troops were employed to force Alabama Governor to allow black students to attend the University of Alabama.

 

Jun 18 – Some 3,000 blacks boycotted public schools in Boston.

 

Jun 26 – President John F. Kennedy visited West Berlin and uttered the words “Ich bin ein Berliner” (I am a Berliner) in a speech.

 

Jun 28 – ISSR President Nikita Khrushchev visited East Berlin.

 

Jul 1 – The U.S. Post Office initiated the 5-digit Zip Code.

 

Jul 26 – An earthquake in Yugoslavia killed over 1,000 people.

 

Aug 3 – The Beatles made their final appearance at the Cavern Cave in Liverpool, England.

 

Aug 13 -- Jun 11 – A Buddhist monk burned himself to death on a street in Saigon to protest actions of the South Vietnamese Government.

 

Aug 18 – James Meredith became the first black to graduate from the University of Mississippi.

 

Aug 19 – Madame Ngo Dinh Nhu, official hostess of the South Vietnamese Government, offered to light the match of the next monk suicide.

 

Aug 21 – Martial law was declared in South Vietnam as police began a crackdown on Buddhist anti-government protesters.

 

Aug 24 – President John F. Kennedy authorized a military coup against South Vietnam’s President Diem, leading to the assassination of Diem a couple of months later.

 

Aug 26 – Orders from Washington DC were issued to destroy all cables sent to Saigon, South Vietnam, dating back to August 24.

 

Aug 28 – Some 250,000 demonstrators gathered in Washington DC, which included Martin Luther King’s “I Have a Dream” speech.

 

Sep 2 -- Alabama Governor George Wallace ordered state troopers to prevent Tuskegee High School from being integrated.

 

Sep 9 – A landslide in Italy killed some 4,000 people.

 

Sep 10 – President John F. Kennedy federalized the Alabama National Guard to prevent Alabama Governor from blocking public school integration.

 

Sep 13 – Construction of the Glen Canyon Dam on the Colorado River forming Lake Powell was completed.

 

Sep 15 – The Ku Klux Klan bombed the 16^th St. Baptist Church in Birmingham, Alabama, killing four young black girls.

 

Sep 27 – The population of the USA reached 190 million and the minimum wage was set at $1.25 per hour.

 

Oct 4 – A hurricane killed some 8,000 people in the Dominican Republic, Haiti and Cuba.

 

Oct 6 – The Los Angeles Dodgers swept the New York Yankees, four games to zero, to win the baseball World Series.

 

Oct 10 – A dam burst in Italy killing an estimated 2,000 people.

 

Nov 14 – A volcano formed a new island five miles south of Iceland.

 

Nov 22 – President John F. Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas, Texas.

 

Nov 22 – Mob boss Carlos Marcello of New Orleans was acquitted of criminal charges.

 

Nov 24 – Jack Ruby killed Lee Harvey Oswald, the accused assassin of President Kennedy.

 

Nov 28 – The Crusher beat Verne Gagne to become the NWA professional heavyweight wrestling champion.

 

Nov 29 – President Lyndon Johnson appointed Chief Justice Earl Warren to form a commission to investigate the assassination of President John F. Kennedy.

 

Dec 9 – Frank Sinatra, Jr. was kidnapped whereupon Frank Sinatra, Sr. paid a $240,000 ransom for his safe release.

 

Dec 12 – Kenya gained independence from Britain.

 

Dec 31 – The Top Ten Songs of 1963:

 

1 – Louie Louie by the Kingsmen

2 – She Loves You by the Beatles

3 – I Want To Hold Your Hand by the Beatles

4 – Be My Baby by the Ronettes

5 – I Saw Her Standing There by the Beatles

6 – Surfin’ USA by the Beach Boys

7 – Glad All Over by the Dave Clark Five

8 – It’s All Right by the Impressions

9 – Blowin’ In The Wind by Peter Paul and Mary

10 – Please Please Me by the Beatles

 

In 1963, I was a sophomore at the University of Minnesota, mostly trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my life.

 

In 2013, I’m still trying to figure it out.

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Quote for the Day – “The stories of courage … they can teach, they can offer hope, they can provide inspiration. But they cannot supply courage itself. For this each man must look into his own soul.” John F. Kennedy

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Bret Burquest is the author of 9 books, including THE REALITY OF THE ILLUSION OF REALITY and 11:11 EARTH TIME (available on Amazon). He lives in the Ozark Mountains with a dog named Buddy Lee and occasionally talks to trees.

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We are rich not by what we possess, but rather how we live our lives -- it's better to live rich than to die rich.

 

Charles F. Feeney was born in 1931 in Elizabeth, New Jersey, into a blue-collar Irish-American family. He served as a radio operator in the U.S. Air Force during the Korean War and attended Cornell University on the G.I. Bill.

 

In the 1950s, Feeney began his career by selling duty-free liquor to U.S. Naval personnel in Mediterranean ports.

 

In 1960, he co-founded the "Duty Free Shoppers Group" (DFS Group) with Robert Warren Miller, headquartered in Hong Kong. Duty free shopping is a concept that offers travelers high-end products free of import fees.

 

DFS eventually became the world's largest travel retailer.

 

In 1982, Feeney founded "The Atlantic Philanthropies" which supports global social projects through endowments and grants. He created his charitable organization in Bermuda which would allow him to avoid U.S. financial disclosure requirements, but also meant he would be unable to claim tax deductions when he contributed to his various charitable causes. Basically, he wanted to remain anonymous in his giving and wasn't seeking any tax breaks for doing so.

 

Feeney then began giving sizeable charitable donations anonymously to causes in the USA, Australia, Ireland, Bermuda, South Africa, Vietnam and elsewhere.

 

"I set out to work hard, not to get rich," Charles Feeney proclaims. Known as a frugal person, he does not own a home or a car, and always flies coach class.

 

In 1996, Feeney sold his share of DFS to a French luxury item group and  became a very wealthy man.

 

The following year, Feeney disclosed his role in Atlantic Philanthropies, after 15 years of anonymous donations, yet continued to keep a low profile. He reluctantly disclosed his anonymity when he became involved in a legal matter involving his former DFS Group partner, fearing it would reveal his identity and the donations involved.

 

As of 2009, Atlantic Philanthropies had made charitable donations totaling more than $9 billion to various projects all over the world, with plans to contribute the remaining $4 billion by the end of 2017.

 

"I cannot think of a more personally rewarding and appropriate use of wealth than to give while one is living -- to personally devote oneself to meaningful efforts to improve the human condition." Charles Feeney

 

Feeney's biography was also made public, with his cooperation, in a book titled THE BILLIONAIRE WHO WASN'T: HOW CHUCK FEENEY MADE AND GAVE AWAY A FORTUNE WITHOUT ANYONE KNOWING by Conor O'Clery

 

There's nothing wrong with individuals possessing riches, the wrong occurs when the riches possess individuals.

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Quote for the Day -- "He who is contented is rich." Lao Tzu

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Bret Burquest is the author of 9 books, including THE REALITY OF THE ILLUSION OF REALITY and 11:11 EARTH TIME (available on Amazon). He lives in the Ozark Mountains with a dog named Buddy Lee and where $4 billion will go a very long way.

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There exists a synchronicity between all things in the Universe and Beyond.

 

In 1898, a man named Morgan Robertson wrote a novel titled FUTILITY -- a story about a passenger ship, the largest and most grandiose luxury ocean liner ever produced. It sailed on its maiden voyage from Southampton on the south coast of England, destination the United States of America, loaded with wealthy passengers.

 

The ship was named the TITAN.

 

However, the TITAN never did reach the USA -- it struck an iceberg and sank, an enormously horrific disaster which included heavy loss of life.

 

In 1912, a passenger ship, the largest and most grandiose luxury ocean liner ever produced, sailed on its maiden voyage from Southampton on the south coast of England, destination the United States of America, loaded with wealthy passengers.

 

The ship was named the TITANIC.

 

The fictional TITAN and the doomed TITANIC were approximately the same size and speed, both carrying some 3,000 passengers. And both were declared to be unsinkable.

 

Four days into the crossing of the Atlantic Ocean, the TITANIC was some 375 miles south of Newfoundland. At 40 minutes before midnight on April 14, 1912, the luxury liner hit an iceberg, buckling the hull on the starboard sink and soon sank.

 

The TITANIC had only enough lifeboat capacity for 1,178 people. When the ship went down, 1,513 people perished. The remains of the unsinkable ocean liner currently lay on the ocean floor, in two pieces, at a depth of 12,415 feet.

 

In 1935, a tramp steamer was bound from England to Canada. A seaman named William Reeves was on the bow, standing watch alone until his shift ended at midnight on April 14. Seaman Reeves had been born on April 14, 1912, the day the TITANIC hit an iceberg just before midnight and sank. It was his 23rd birthday.

 

The tramp steamer was named the TITANIAN.

 

The sea was calm and visibility poor. Seaman Reeves was dwelling on the sinking of the TITANIC years earlier on his date of birth, when he shouted out a danger warning. The helmsman rang the bell and engines went into full astern.

 

The TITANIAN came to rest a few yards from a huge iceberg. Other icebergs soon floated in, surrounding the steamer. It took nine days for ice breakers from Newfoundland to cut a path through the ice and rescue the ship.

 

The TITAN went down on the pages of fiction -- 14 years later, the TITANIC went down on April 14, killing more than 1,500 people -- 23 years later, the TITANIAN almost went down on April 14, but was spared by fate.

 

We reside in a Great Mystery, dismayed by coincidence, awakened by serendipity.

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Quote for the Day -- "Coincidences may seem strange, but they are never a result of caprice. They are orderly laws in the spiritual life of man." Norman Vincent Peale

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Bret Burquest is the author of 9 books, including THE REALITY OF THE ILLUSION OF REALITY and 11:11 EARTH TIME (available on Amazon). He lives in the Ozark Mountains with a dog named Buddy Lee and where every single moment is serendipity.

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Herbert Norman Schwarzkopf, Jr. was born on August 22, 1934, in Trenton, New Jersey. Because his father grew to dislike the name "Herbert" the birth certificate was amended in 1952 to alter the name to H. Norman Schwarzkopf whereby "Norman" became the familiar first name.

 

Norman's father had served in the U.S. Army and later became the superintendent of the New Jersey State Police. As such, he was the lead investigator in the 1932 Lindbergh baby kidnapping case, two years before Norman was born. He later re-joined the U.S. Army and rose to the rank of Major General.

 

In 1946, at age 12, Norman and the rest of the family joined their father stationed in Iran. As a military dependent, Norman attended school in Tehran, Iran, Frankfurt, Germany, and graduated from Valley Forge Military Academy in Pennsylvania.

 

After Valley Forge Military Academy, Norman attended the U.S. Military Academy at West Point, graduating 43rd in his class in 1956 with a B.S. degree. He later attended the University of Southern California, receiving a M.S. degree in mechanical engineering, having specialized in guided missile engineering. He was also a member of Mensa, a fellowship of individuals with high IQs.

 

After West Point, in 1956, he became a 2nd lieutenant and received Airborne training at Ft. Benning in Georgia. Next, he became a platoon leader in an Airborne unit at Ft. Campbell, Kentucky. In 1960, he was an aide to the Commanding General in Berlin, Germany. In 1965, upon receiving his masters degree from USC, Schwarzkopf became an instructor in the Mechanical Engineering Department at West Point.

 

In 1965, while teaching at West Point, Schwarzkopf volunteered for duty in Vietnam, where he became a Task Force Advisor to the South Vietnamese Airborne Division, reaching the rank of Major. After his tour of duty overseas, he returned for two more years of teaching at West Point. In 1968, he was promoted to Lieutenant Colonel and also married his wife Brenda.

 

After West Point, Schwarzkopf returned to Vietnam. In March of 1970, several soldiers under his command had been trapped in a minefield. He scrambled to the scene in his helicopter where he advised the men to slowly retrace their steps. One of the soldiers tripped a mine explosion and was severely wounded. The other soldiers in the minefield remained frozen, fearing they would trigger another explosion.

 

Schwarzkopf, also wounded in the blast, crawled into the minefield, reached the wounded soldier, and secured him while another soldier applied a splint to the shattered leg. Another soldier then tripped an explosive mine, killing himself and two other nearby soldiers, and blowing off a leg and an arm of Schwarzkopf's artillery liaison officer. Eventually, Schwarzkopf led the surviving soldiers to safety.

 

During the 1970s, Schwarzkopf served in the Pentagon, was Deputy Commander of U.S. Forces in Alaska, an Infantry Brigade Commander at Ft. Lewis, Washington, promoted to Brigadier General, became a Plans and Policy Officer at U.S. Pacific Command, served as a Division Commander in West Germany, promoted to Major General, commanded a Mechanized Infantry Division at Ft. Stewart, Georgia, was heavily involved in the skirmish in Grenada. By 1985, he had been assigned to duty again at the Pentagon, was promoted to Lieutenant General, returned to Ft. Lewis, Washington, as Commanding General of I Corps, then back to the Pentagon as Deputy Chief of Staff, promoted to General in 1988, appointed Commander-in-Chief of U.S. Central Command at MacDill Air Force Base in Tampa, Florida.

 

One of his duties as Commander-in-Chief was to formulate plans to defend the oil fields in the Persian Gulf region. When Iraq invaded Kuwait in 1988, Schwarzkopf's plans became the blueprint for Operation Desert Storm. The "left hook" strategy called for U.S. Forces to enter Iraq behind the Iraqi Forces occupying Kuwait -- the ground war lasted only four days.

 

Schwarzkopf, affable and witty, received a lot of favorable press coverage during Desert Storm, where we was dubbed "Stormin' Norman" by members of the press corp.

 

"Going to war without the French is like going deer hunting without an accordion." Gen. H. Norman Schwarzkopf

 

After the war, he was offered the position of Chief of Staff of the U.S. Army but he turned it down, choosing to retire in 1991.

 

Stormin' Norman Schwarzkopf passed on to the Great Beyond on December 27, 2012 -- your nation is grateful for your gallant, spirited service.

 

Rest in Peace.

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Quote for the Day -- "As you get older it is harder to have heroes, but it is sort of necessary." Ernest Hemmingway

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Bret Burquest is the author of 9 books, including THE REALITY OF THE ILLUSION OF REALITY and 11:11 EARTH TIME (available on Amazon). He lives in the Ozark Mountains with a dog named Buddy Lee and served in the U.S. Army in 1966-68 during the Vietnam Conflict.

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I was an adjunct instructor at Ozarka College In northern Arkansas in 2001 to 2006, where I taught computer classes in the evenings, usually two classes per semester, at facilities in Melbourne and Ash Flat. Every desk had a computer, tied into the main system at the Melbourne campus.

 

The students generally came in two varieties -- youngsters not far out of high school who had considerable computer skills and older people who wanted to learn about computers so the could make use of their home PCs.

 

One thing I learned along the way is that a teacher never stops learning. For example, there is a big difference between young whippersnappers (younger generations) and old codgers (older generations).

 

One semester at the Melbourne facility, there were 18 students in my Microprocessor Applications class. Four of them were older students, in their 40s and 50s. These four students had impeccable attendance records and the four highest overall grades, based on computer projects and tests. The rest of the students were a year or two out of high school. With few exceptions, they had spotty attendance and didn't seem to put forth an effort equal to their older counterparts. By the way, everyone in that particular class was a female student, thus these differences had nothing to do with gender.

 

One semester at the Ash Fat facility, I had 11 students in my Introduction to Computers class. There were five older students, ages 30 to 75, and six students fresh out of high school. Once again, the five older students had good attendance records and the five highest overall grades, even though they knew less about computers at the outset than the youngsters.

 

This isn't exactly a scientific survey, but from my point of view old codgers seem to have a strong ethic to succeed while young whippersnappers have a strong yearning to slide through life with the greatest of ease.

 

Having interviewed and hired people in the past as the Lead Programmer and General Manager of a Computer Software Company, it's been my experience that the best workers are the ones who actually show up and put forth an effort once they get there. A strong work ethic and eager attitude (beyond the false persona of the interview process) were always major requirements when I hired people.

 

Having finished college is also a must. An employer is more willing to hire someone who has demonstrated they can finish what they started rather than some hotshot who quits in the middle. Being smart is secondary to a good work ethic. And being a class clown only helps if you want to become a comic or a writer.

 

There seems to be a generation gap throughout society these days. Many young people don't want to take responsibility for their own future. It's as though they expect some outside force, such as an omnipresent government, to control their world so they can just float through life without encountering too many obstacles or making too many decisions.

 

In a recent poll of 100,000 high school students, only 51% believe newspapers should be allowed to publish content without government approval and 20% feel people should not be allowed to express unpopular views. Apparently fascism is a desirable concept among an alarmingly large percentage of the youth of America.

 

Obviously, there are real differences between generations.

 

Young whippersnappers worry about the driver's test – old codgers worry about the vision test.

 

Old codgers remember where they were when JFK was assassinated – young whippersnappers remember where they were when INVASION OF THE ZOMBIES came out.

 

Young whippersnappers arrange for their next KEG – old codgers arrange for their next EKG. 

 

Old codgers move to Arizona because it's warm -- young whippersnappers move to Arizona because it's cool.

 

Young whippersnappers often have long hair – old codgers often long for hair.

 

Old codgers fought wars for freedom of speech – young whippersnappers believe in freedom of speech as long as you get government approval first and don't say anything disagreeable.

 

If you want to get ahead in this world, show up and do the work. If you want to goof off, move to San Francisco. I've been there a few times -- it didn't take very long to get past it, but I still have a little bit of goof-off in reserve.

 

If you believe in freedom, fight for it. If you want to be a slave, empower those in charge to monitor everyone more closely and suppress unpopular thought, and perhaps build "re-education" centers for those who stray.

 

Government is dominated by those who yearn to control others. It becomes increasingly powerful by eroding liberty, requiring conformity and demanding obedience.

 

When you lose your individuality, you lose your soul.

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Quote for the Day -- "What a teacher is, is more important than what he teaches." Karl A. Menninger

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Bret Burquest is the author of 9 books, including THE REALITY OF THE ILLUSION OF REALITY and 11:11 EARTH TIME (available on Amazon). He lives in the Ozark Mountains with a dog named Buddy Lee and where Old Codgers continue to pass skills onto Young Whippersnappers.

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