REMINDER FROM GOD:

Hello, Lord

"Pray without ceasing."1

Ivor Bailey prayed: "I enjoy talking to you every night, Lord. I tell you what's on my mind—the things that bug me, the people I meet, the challenges I face, questions I can't answer.

"Because you're my friend, I don't feel I have to dress up or use out-dated language. I can relax with you.

"Isn't that what prayer is all about, Lord? You and I sharing things we think are important. Thank you, Lord."

Besides the Lord's Prayer this is another excellent way to approach prayer—just share with God what's on your heart, what's on your mind, what you are feeling, your joys, sorrows, and so on.

Sharing feelings is what intimacy, communication and connection are all about—not only with people, but also with God. We can do this not only at night but anytime, anywhere.

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, help me to be open, honest, and real with you. You desire truth in the innermost being. Help me to share my inner truth with you—the good, the bad, the indifferent—share it all, God, no matter what. Thank you for hearing, accepting all my feelings, and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. 1 Thessalonians 5:17.

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WORD FOR THE DAY:

    sansculotte
    audio pronunciation
    sanz-koo-LAHT

    DEFINITION

noun
1
: an extreme radical republican in France at the time of the Revolution
2
: a radical or violent extremist in politics

    EXAMPLES

"At the time of the French Revolution, the rampaging sansculottes wrecked churches and every sign of monarchal or religious authority." — From Peter Manseau's 2009 book Rag and Bone

"Anyone who has toyed before a mirror with something as simple as a cap or as exotic as a turban understands the almost mystical power of head coverings to transform us.... Revolutionaries have adopted them, from Che Guevara's beret to the red Phrygian cap worn by the sansculottes as a symbol of allegiance to the French Revolution, while many an aristocratic head rolled." — From an article by Leslie Carnhi in Vogue, May 2012

    DID YOU KNOW?

At the time of the French Revolution (1787-1799), knee breeches ("culottes" in French) were the height of fashion for aristocratic men. The men of the general populace could not afford such impractical finery and instead wore the "pantaloon" (long trousers). When the poorer classes rose up against the government, members of the Revolutionary army used this difference in dress to distinguish themselves from the aristocracy, calling themselves "soldats sans culottes," literally, "soldiers without culottes." Almost immediately, "sansculotte" became a noun in both French and English.
Read more at http://www.merriam-webster.com/word-of-the-day/2012/08/27/#eq2k8yDHG3... to Handle Jealousy

Handle Jealousy

Jealousy happens when a person feels that a relationship that is of importance is threatened by someone else outside of the relationship, be it romantic, platonic, friendship, parent-child, sibling etc. Jealousy can also occur in the context of competitive situations, such as the workplace or education. Jealousy differs from envy, in that the latter is where you desire something that another person has, although sometimes you can feel both at the same time.

Jealousy is not a rare emotion––many people feel it now and then. However, contrary to the beliefs of some people, it's not a sign of devotion or care for another person; rather, it's a sign that a part of you has some maturing to do yet so that you feel secure and safe within the relationships you have. While jealousy can pull you down and even pull apart a relationship, it can also be a signal to you that it's time to change and find the maturity you need to proceed to the next stage of your emotional growth. Rather than letting jealousy infect your relationship with others, use its appearance as a reason to work on yourself and to free yourself from the fears that drive it.

Steps

    1      Understand the emotion of jealousy. A combination of fear and anger, jealousy is fed by the fear of losing someone (or a cherished situation/state of affairs) and anger that someone else is "moving in" on the person or situation that is of value to you personally. It's a destructive and ignoble emotion and nothing good can come of it, so recognition of its occurrence is your number one self-defense.

    2    Deconstruct why you feel jealous in the first place. From a place of self-compassion, try to figure out why you're feeling jealous. Often jealousy is about reliving an experience of failure from the past that continues to inform your level of trust (or lack thereof) toward people in the present, even though current conditions may be vastly different. Other motivators for feeling jealous include: a high level of insecurity, anger toward yourself and fear of abandonment or vulnerability. If you're honest with yourself, you will realize that feeling jealous often rears its head at the same time you feel threatened, afraid of being abandoned or when you feel you just cannot trust the other person, no matter how little basis your lack of trust has. However, this shouldn't be about finding nothing but fault with yourself––being compassionate about your self-assessment is an essential part of staying objective about the green eyed monster.
  
    3    Take a good look at the effect your jealous behavior has on other people. It can be easy to justify your suspicious mind by viewing the defensive responses of others as confirmation of your suspicions. However, defensiveness is a natural response to people who are placed under pressure to justify their actions, whereabouts and thoughts all of the time––being constantly questioned as to what you're doing, where you're going and where you've been is tiring, disparaging and quickly demoralizing. People feeling squeezed by a jealous line of questioning and assumptions will also feel undermined, badgered and frustrated. Reactions that display impatience, frustration, irritation and anger are not confirmations of guilt––they are signs that the person has reached the end of a tether and is defending his or her genuine, non-suspicious actions.
           If you suddenly decide that your friend or lover is incapable of fending off the advances of a new friend or lover, then you have placed that person in a really insidious position of both having to reassure you at the same time as realizing that the lack of trust you have in him or her places a wedge in the relationship that wasn't there previously. Put yourself into his or her shoes––how would you feel if badgered in this fashion?
   
    4  Tackle your feelings now. Learn to question your jealousy every time that it emerges. For example, say to yourself: "Is this jealousy because I feel afraid or angry? Why am I feeling fear or anger here?" When you begin to question what makes you jealous in the moment, you can begin to take positive steps to manage the feelings constructively, without the cloud of negative emotion that typically accompanies jealousy. Some questions to ask yourself include:
        "Why am I jealous over this?"
        "What is making me jealous?"
        " What am I trying to keep?"
        "Why do I feel threatened?"
   
    5    Change any false beliefs that might be fueling your jealousy. There are often false, baseless beliefs that underlie reactions of jealousy. If you examine the belief, you can often eliminate the jealousy. Some common underlying beliefs without basis include “Everyone is out to get my money” or “If this person leaves me, I won't have any friends.” In both cases, these are generalizations that could never be applied to every person you know or meet. In fact, these are pre-emptive defenses against the potential of something bad happening to you. Beliefs are changeable by choice. If you change your belief, you change the way you feel. Choose to tell yourself a belief that is nurturing and supportive, and you'll feel better. If you think it's better to think negatively, ask yourself what possible benefit that brings you over thinking more healthily––thoughts create emotions and you have the choice to make the thoughts negative or positive. When you begin taking steps to creating a happy and fulfilling life           for  yourself, you will find the anger and the fear easier to manage, removing the fuel for the jealous feelings.
         Be aware that your thoughts can happen so quickly that you don't even realize consciously that you've had a negative thought. Developing greater awareness of your thoughts and triggers is a large part of tackling the problem.
  
    6    Take notice of which part of your body is affected. Fear is often felt as a dropping or clutching sensation in your stomach, while anger often manifests itself as a burning, tight sensation in your shoulders and jaw. As well, it's not unusual to feel both fear and anger at the same time, bringing forth all of the bodily impacts mentioned. Noticing bodily sensations can be a trigger for you to start changing how you're thinking and to question the jealous feelings.
  
    7    Apologize. Before doing anything else, make the other person feel better if you've gone far enough to expose your jealous emotions around him or her. Realize that by not apologizing, you are in actual effect seeking to punish the other person for your feelings. The act of apologizing in itself shouldn't be lengthy or complicated––the fact that you do apologize will help begin to break the cycle. Simply make a conscious decision to stop indulging in suspicions and say to the other person something like: "I'm sorry for asking those questions of you. I've had some silly jealous thoughts that have caused me to imagine what isn't there." This will often be sufficient to give both of you the space to discuss what has just taken place––recognition of your poor behavior and the need to be more open together about what you're going through.
  
    8    Communicate your feelings and dialog about your jealousy problem together. Sharing your true feelings with the affected person and talking it through can be a very cathartic and constructive way to start mending the damage done. It can also be a way of creating an ally, someone who will feel able to point out when you make unreasonable jealous demands on him or her without expecting comeback. When talking through what you've been feeling, take heed of the following:
    Avoid passing on blame to the other person. His or her behavior is not the cause of your feelings––you are responsible for your feelings.
    Stick to "I" statements rather than saying anything that smacks of "you make me feel…". Instead of saying, "You shouldn't have done that," say, "I felt terrible when that incident happened."
    Be aware that how you perceive situations may be completely at odds with how the other person saw them. Stay as open-minded as possible, even though this will probably mean that you sometimes feel extremely defensive. Do your best to keep quiet and listen rather than constantly butting in with justifications.
    Above all, be compassionate, both for yourself and for the person you've been offloading your jealousy onto. Recognize the harm you've caused, the harm you've suffered and work with it to find better ways forward. Be passionate about your desire to improve your feelings and stop the jealousy.
    In most cases, this won't be a one-off conversation. You'll need to agree to keep coming back to talking any time the green eyed monster gets out of hand again.
  
    9    Bear in mind at all times that feelings of jealousy are about you, not about the other person. Any sense that things are out of control means that you need to transfer the intensity of what you're feeling into something constructive rather than continuing to over-analyze the relationship (or situation). For example, get involved in a sport, some exercise, a hobby or participating in volunteer work. Do something that takes you out of yourself and causes you to focus beyond the relationship or situation and gives you an outlet for your emotions that is healthier than ruminating and raising suspicions.
   
  10    Learn from your jealousy. The ignoble, negative emotions have a role in our lives, one of teaching each of us how to be a better person for struggling and overcoming them. They have a place, just not one that controls you and excuses poor behavior. Some of the things jealousy might be teaching you include:
    You are frightened when a relationship is new and still has some way to go before it feels secure. This is a commonplace feeling in young relationships for many people, and both possessiveness as well as sense of vulnerability at getting close to someone, can drive feelings of jealousy.
    You're afraid someone else will take your job, salary, role, position, and so forth. In this case, it's probable that you're afraid of financial insecurity (survival instinct) or you feel that you're an impostor in your role, the latter an all-too-commonly held false belief in many high-achieving people in the workforce. Remember that you wouldn't have been given the role or position unless other people felt you had earned it. Try living up to that trust in you than seeing demons hovering in every corner.
    You feel your lover has a roving eye. In romantic relationships, both men and women continue to check out other men and women. It's biologically driven and it's natural.[1] However, in the majority of cases, it does not mean that the person wants to leave the relationship he or she is in with you. It is, for most people, about appreciating the human form and not about a roaming eye. This misunderstanding has long created unnecessary jealousy as long as relationships have existed; it can help to accept that it's okay for a person in a committed relationship to look, provided there's no touch!
    You listen to people who say mean or exaggerated things and let this direct your emotions. All too common, many people are easily convinced by the village gossip because it sounds so compelling and seems like it must be right. The reality is that it rarely is right and it's always far better to not listen to people who chatter away making things up as they go. Let these people go get jobs as celebrity gossip journalists while you get on with facing the facts instead.
    You dislike looking within yourself and working through difficult emotions. It's typical to externalize painful emotions, to try and make them someone else's problem than to do the hard work of facing them and dealing with them internally. Jealousy is painful but by facing it, you can repair much internal damage that ultimately makes your relationships stronger and more enduring.
 
  11   Trust yourself. Trust begins at home, with yourself. If you learn to trust yourself, you can radiate this trust onto others. Begin by making a list of all your good points. Stick this list up somewhere that you can see it regularly, to remind yourself that you're fully equipped with great talent, skills and features already. Moreover, only compare yourself to yourself, always seeking to outdo your last achievement without worrying what other people are doing. Remind yourself daily through a journal, affirmations or other effective way that you have what it takes to be fulfilled in life. Practicing healthy thinking must be a daily, recurring action––that's why it involves constant practice. In time, the healthier thinking processes will take over the destructive ones and help you to become a whole person, resilient, capable and not prone to jealous thoughts.
    Work on relevant aspects of your self esteem if you feel it's lacking. When you have more confidence in yourself, you'll be less likely to feel jealous.

 Tips
    Jealousy is not the same thing as love. Sometimes, people think that by feeling jealous about someone, they are loving him or her by being possessive or wanting ownership over the person. Jealousy is not love; it’s the fear and anger of losing out or being abandoned. It's stifling and unkind, and in most instances, you'll lose this person.
    Jealousy is not envy; unfortunately, the two words are easily mixed up and this leads to confusion. Jealousy is about infringement on a relationship or personally valuable situation by a rival who threatens to remove something that is rightfully yours or to which you have a rightful claim. Envy involves looking at others, comparing yourself and your own situation, and finding things in your life wanting. In this latter case, you want what someone else has (a trait, an achievement, an object, a role, etc.) and you're left feeling resentful, under-accomplished, inferior or discontented.
    Fake it. Portray a non-jealous facade while you work on overcoming jealousy. Eventually, working your way through your feelings, the facade will become real, but in the meantime you will protect yourself from appearing jealous to others.
    Try to talk about your problems with someone other than the person you're projecting the jealousy onto. Perhaps you feel that these jealous tendencies are a private matter; then, you might like to anonymously ask an advice column or similar advice source about your problem.
    Be alert to the possibility that it is your own viewpoint that is distorting reality. Trade your anger for curiosity, try to get the bigger picture before making rash judgments.
    Some situations in life set you up for instant jealousy, such as being part of a polygamous marriage or working or living with another person who has been singled out for favoritism. These are quite distinctive situations that carry a lot of unhealthy emotional baggage that needs to be addressed with great care and empathy. You might be best seeking counseling if you continue to live within such situations.

 Warnings
    If jealousy in your relationship is leading to control or power struggles, it's a sign that there is an underlying issue that needs to be addressed with your partner.

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RECIPES:

Bittersweet Chocolate Poundcake

Rich and dense, this bittersweet chocolate poundcake, with just a hint of coffee, is topped with a shiny and tempting chocolate glaze.

Serves: 12
Prep Time: 25 minutes
Cook Time: 50 minutes
     
 
2 cups all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 1/2 cups water
2 tablespoons instant coffee
4 bars NESTLÉ ® TOLL HOUSE ® Unsweetened Chocolate Baking Bars
2 cups granulated sugar
1 cup butter, softened
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 large eggs
3 tablespoons butter or margarine
1 1/2 cups sifted powdered sugar
2 tablespoons water
2 tablespoons confectioners' sugar, optional, for sprinkling


FOR CAKE: Preheat the oven to 325° F. Grease 10-inch Bundt pan.

Combine the flour, baking soda and baking powder in a small bowl. Bring the water and coffee granules to a boil in small saucepan and remove from the heat. Add 3 bars (6 ounces) of baking chocolate to the pan and stir until smooth.

Beat the sugar, butter and vanilla extract in a large mixer bowl until creamy. Add the eggs and beat on high speed for 5 minutes. Beat in the flour mixture, alternating with the chocolate mixture.

Pour the batter into the prepared pan and bake for 50 to 60 minutes or until long wooden pick inserted in cake comes out clean. Cool in the cake in the pan on a wire rack for 30 minutes. Invert onto wire rack to cool completely.

FOR CHOCOLATE GLAZE: Melt the remaining baking bar (2 ounces) and butter in small, heavy-duty saucepan over low heat, stirring until smooth. Remove from the heat. Stir in confectioners' sugar, alternating with the water until of desired consistency. Stir in the vanilla extract.

Set the cake on a rack positioned in a jelly-roll pan to catch the excess glaze. Pour the glaze over the cooled cake, letting it slide down the sides of the cake. Sprinkle with confectioners' sugar and then let the glaze set before serving.

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Crunchy Orange Chicken Salad

This gourmet salad has a sweet and creamy dressing and the crunchy flavors of almonds and celery. For summertime lunch party or just a light dinner, serve this delicious salad with whole wheat rolls and fresh ice tea.

Serves: 6
Prep Time: 15 minutes
Cook Time: 8 minutes /refrigerate 2 hours   
     
 
2 tablespoon granulated sugar
1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon salt, (optional)
2/3 cup (5 fl.-oz can) NESTLÉ ® Carnation ® Evaporated Milk
1/3 cup orange juice
1 large egg, well beaten
3 cup cooked boneless skinless chicken breast meat, chopped
3 stalk celery, thinly sliced
3/4 cup sliced almonds, toasted
2 tablespoon sliced green onion
1 can (11-oz.) mandarin oranges, drained
1/2 head lettuce leaves, (optional)


DIRECTIONS:

COMBINE sugar, flour and salt in medium, heavy-duty saucepan; gradually stir in evaporated milk, orange juice and egg. Cook over medium heat, stirring constantly, until dressing just comes to a boil and begins to thicken. Remove from heat. Cover; refrigerate until cool.

COMBINE chicken, celery, nuts, dressing and green onion in large bowl. Gently stir in oranges. Cover; refrigerate for 2 hours. Serve over lettuce.

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Greek Baked Pasta

Active Time:  25 Minutes
Total Time:  45 Minutes
Yield:  6

The moist and fragrant casserole pastitsio combines béchamel (a sauce of butter, flour and milk), pasta, ground lamb, tomato sauce, cheese, cinnamon and nutmeg. Instead of béchamel, Grace Parisi stirs a ricotta mixture into the pasta before baking it.


INGREDIENTS
2 tablespoons  extra-virgin olive oil
1 1/2 pounds  lean ground lamb
1   onion finely chopped
1 teaspoon  dried oregano crumbled
3/4 teaspoon  cinnamon
ground cloves
salt and freshly ground pepper
3 cups  jarred marinara sauce
1 pound  ziti or penne
3 cups  fresh ricotta  (1 1/2 pounds)
4   large egg yolks
1/2 teaspoon  ground nutmeg
3/4 cup  freshly grated parmigiano-reggiano cheese

DIRECTIONS

Preheat the oven to 350°. Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. In a large saucepan, heat the olive oil until shimmering. Add the lamb, onion, oregano, cinnamon, cloves and a generous pinch each of salt and pepper. Cook over high heat, stirring frequently, until the lamb is no longer pink and any liquid has evaporated, about 8 minutes. Add the marinara sauce and bring to a boil. Boil over high heat, stirring occasionally, until the sauce has reduced slightly, about 5 minutes.

Cook the pasta until barely al dente; drain and return to the pot. Meanwhile, in a blender, blend 2 cups of the ricotta with the yolks, nutmeg and 1/2 cup of the Parmigiano-Reggiano until smooth. Season with salt and pepper. Pulse in the remaining ricotta.

Add the lamb ragù to the pasta and toss. Transfer the pasta to a 9-by-13-inch baking dish. Pour the ricotta mixture on top and sprinkle with the remaining 1/4 cup of Parmigiano-Reggiano. Bake in the center of the oven for about 20 minutes, until heated through. Turn the broiler on and broil until the top is golden brown. Let stand for a few minutes before serving.

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Old-fashioned Butterscotch Pie
   
 
Active Time:  20 Minutes
Total Time:  5 Hours 35 Minutes
Yield:  Makes 8 servings

If you like the deep, rich taste of brown sugar, use dark brown sugar in this recipe; otherwise, prepare it with light brown sugar for a lighter color and flavor.

INGREDIENTS
.
Fully Baked Pastry Shell

For Filling:
1 1/2 cups packed brown sugar
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/8 teaspoon salt
3 beaten egg yolks
1 1/2 cups milk
2 tablespoons margarine or butter
1 teaspoon vanilla

For Meringue:
3 egg whites
1/4 teaspoon cream of tartar
6 tablespoons sugar

DIRECTIONS

FOR FILLING: Prepare and fully bake pastry shell as directed; set aside to cool. In a heavy, medium saucepan stir together the brown sugar, flour, and salt. Add egg yolks and milk. Cook while stirring with a wire whisk till thickened and bubbly. (Mixture may appear curdled. Stir briskly while cooking and mixture will become smooth.) Cook and stir 2 minutes more. Remove from heat. Stir in margarine or butter and vanilla. Pour hot filling into baked pastry shell.

FOR MERINGUE: In a mixing bowl beat egg whites and cream of tartar with an electric mixer on medium speed about 1 minute, or till soft peaks form (tips curl). Gradually add sugar, 1 tablespoon at a time, beating on high speed about 4 minutes more, or till mixture forms stiff, glossy peaks (tips stand straight) and sugar completely dissolves. Immediately spread meringue over hot filling, spreading to edge of pastry to seal and prevent shrinkage.

Bake pie in a preheated 350 degrees oven for 15 minutes. Cool on a rack for 1 hour. Chill 3-6 hours before serving. Store in the refrigerator.

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Peach Tart

A lovely tart that uses both fresh peaches and peach preserves.

Serves: 8 to 10
Prep Time: 10 minutes
Cook Time: 25 minutes
   
INGREDIENTS:

2 eggs, well beaten
2 cups sour cream
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon almond extract
1 cup Smucker's Peach Preserves
1 11- inch unbaked pastry shell or 12 3-inch unbaked pastry shells
2 cups peeled, thinly sliced fresh peaches
toasted slivered almonds
2 tablespoons brown sugar


DIRECTIONS

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
Combine the eggs, sour cream, and vanilla and almond extracts and blend well. Fold in preserves.
Spoon into pastry shell and spread evenly. Arrange the fresh peaches on top of the tart. Sprinkle the top with almonds and brown sugar.
Bake for 25 to 30 minutes, or until mixture is set. Let cool to room temperature on a wire rack. Refrigerate for at least 2 hours before serving.

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Potato Hobo Packs

These mixes are great! We cook on the grill as much as possible when the weather accommodates. One of my favorite sides is a Potato Hobo Pack and these mixes added a nice flavor. Looking forward to spicing up my other recipes with these mixes!

Ingredients:

    4-5 Medium Potatoes (sliced thin)
    Camp Mix
    Spud Fixin Mix
    1/2 stick Butter (sliced into 9 pads)

    OPTION: (if you like it extra garlicky) 1 tablespoon Minced Garlic (divided)
    Non-stick aluminum foil (or use regular foil with non-stick spray)

Directions:

    Slice 4-5 medium potatoes thin – I use a mandolin – and I also leave the skin’s on.
    Place 1/3 of the slices onto the non-stick side of the aluminum foil leaving about 1.5 to 2 inches of foil all around.
    Sprinkle the layer with Camp Mix and Spud Fixin' Mix. If you’re using it, also scatter 1 teaspoon minced garlic then place three pads of butter on the layer.
    Repeat for 2 more layers (I try to place butter in different spots on each layer).
    Add a second sheet of aluminum foil to the top and seal on all edges by folding over itself twice. If there is a mound of potatoes in your hobo pack now’s the time to flatten them out by pressing down gently to make an even layer. My hobo pack is about 9 x 13 when I'm finished.
    Place on a preheat grill over a medium flame for about 15-20 min (watch to make sure it doesn't burn). My grill has a temperature gauge which shows the inside temperature to be about 375-400 degrees.
    Use a spatula instead of tongs to remove it (the tongs will break the foil). Unwrapped they will keep warm for 10 minutes.


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JOKES:

 
Husband took the wife to a disco on the weekend.  There was a guy on the dance floor giving it large - breakdancing, moonwalking, back flips, the works.  The wife turned to husband and said: "See that guy? 25 years ago he  proposed to me and I turned him down."  Husband says: "Looks like he's still celebrating!!! 

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Hole Under Door Lock
A victim wrote:

Wednesday, I approached my truck from the passenger side
to place my computer bag (aka my man purse) in the
front passenger seat.

A s I reached to open the door I noticed there was a hole
right under my door handle.

My first thought was, "someone has shot my truck!"

I began to think about it and inspect it a little closer and
the "light" slowly began to come on.

I phoned my friend who owns a body shop and asked if
he had any vehicles with damage to the doors that looked
like a bullet hole.

"Yes, I see it all the time. Thieves have a punch and
place it right under the door handle, knock a hole through,
reach in and unlock it, just as if they have a key.
No alarms, broken glass, or anything.

I then placed a call to my insurance agent and explained
it to him. I was puzzled that they left my GPS and all
other belongings. Here is where it gets scary!

"Oh no, he said, they want the break-in to be so subtle
that you don't even realize it. They look at your GPS
to see where "home" is. Now, they know what you drive,
go to your home, and if your vehicle isn't there they
assume you aren't and break into your home."

He said they will even leave a purse or wallet and only
take one or two credit cards. By the time you realize
there has been a theft, they may have already had a
couple of days or more to use them.

(I didn't realize my situation for two full days!)

They even give you the courtesy of re-locking your doors
for you.

Periodically, walk around your car, especially after you
park in a shopping center or other large parking area.

Report thefts immediately....your bank w/missing check
numbers, your credit card agencies, police, and insurance
companies, etc.

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    I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on. I said "You're pulling my leg."

    I saw a poor old lady fall over today on the ice! At least I presume she was poor - she only had $1.20 in her purse.

    My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker. Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend yet.

    Went for my routine check-up today and everything seemed to be going fine until he stuck his index finger up my butt! Do you think I should change dentists?

    I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated but must come back as a different creature. She said she would like to come back as a cow. I said, "You're obviously not listening."

    The wife has been missing a week now. Police said to prepare for the worst. So, I have been to the thrift shop to get all of her clothes back.

    At the Senior Citizens Center they had a contest the other day. I lost by one point: The question was: Where do women mostly have curly hair?
    Apparently the correct answer was Africa! Who knew?

    One of the other questions that I missed was to name one thing commonly found in cells. It appears that Mexicans is not the correct answer either.

    There's a new Muslim clothing shop opened in our shopping center, but I've been banned from it after asking to look at some of the new bomber jackets.

    A buddy of mine has just told me he's getting it on with his girlfriend and her twin. I said "How can you tell them apart?" He said "Her brother's got a moustache."

    Just put a deposit down on a brand new Porsche and mentioned it on Facebook. I said, "I can't wait for the new 911 to arrive!" Next thing I know 4,000 f**king Muslims have added me as a friend!

    Being a modest man, when I checked into my hotel on a recent trip, I said to the lady at the registration desk, "I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled." To which she replied, "No, it's regular porn, you sick bastard."

    The Red Cross have just knocked at our door and asked if we could help towards the floods in Pakistan. I said we would love to, but our garden hose only reaches the driveway.

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Black Bras size 38

    

    The Business Deal

    Description: black brab

    A Chinese guy goes into a Jewish-owned establishment to buy black bras, size 38. The Jewish store keeper, known for his skills as a businessman, says that black bras are rare and that he is finding it very difficult to buy them from his suppliers. Therefore he has to charge $50.00 for them.

    The Chinese guy buys 25 pairs.

    He returns a few days later and this time orders fifty.

    The Jewish owner tells him that they have become even harder to get and charges him $60.00 each.

    The Chinese guy returns a month later and buys the store's remaining stock of 50, and this time for $75.00 each.

    The Jewish owner is somewhat puzzled by the large demand for black size 38 bras and asks the Chinese guy, "...please tell me - What do you do with all these black bras?"

    The Chinese guy answers: "I cut them in half and sell them as skull caps to you Jews for $200.00 each."

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Senior Citizens...!!!!

 

 

 At a Senior  Citizen's luncheon, an elderly
Gentleman and an elderly lady
Struck  up a conversation and discovered that
They both loved to fish.
Since  both of them were widowed,
They decided to go fishing together the next  day.
The gentleman picked the lady up, and they
Headed to the river  to his fishing boat and
Started out on their adventure.

They  were riding down the river when there was a
Fork in the river, and the  gentleman asked the lady,

'Do you want to go up or  down?'

All of a sudden the lady stripped off her shirt
And pants  and made mad passionate love to the man
Right there in the boat  !

When they finished, the man couldn't believe
What had just  happened, but he had just experienced
The best sex that he'd had in  years.

They fished for a while and continued on down the
River,  when soon they came upon another fork in the
River.

He again  asked the lady , 'Up or down ?'

There she went again, stripped off  her clothes,
And made wild passionate love to him again.

This  really impressed the elderly gentleman, so
He asked her to go fishing  again the next day.

She said yes and there they were the next  day,
Riding in the boat when they came upon the fork in
River, and  the elderly gentleman asked, 'Up or down ?'

The woman replied,  'Down.'

A little puzzled and disappointed, the gentleman
Guided  the boat down the river when he came upon
Another fork in the river and  he asked the
Lady,' Up or down ?'

She replied, 'Up.'

This  really confused the gentleman so he asked,

'What's the deal?  Yesterday, every time I asked
You if you wanted to go up or down, you  made mad passionate love to me. Now today, nothing!' 

She replied,  'Well, yesterday I wasn't wearing
My hearing aid and I thought the  choices were
 
friggin or  drown...'

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Little Johnny's Breakfast !!!!!!!
 
A grade three teacher is giving a lesson on nutrition, and she decides to ask her students what they had for breakfast.
To add a spelling component, she asks the students to also spell their answers.
Susan puts up her hand and says she had an egg, 'E-G-G'.
'Very good', says the teacher.
Peter says he had toast 'T-O-A-S-T'.
'Excellent.'
Johnny has his hand up and the teacher reluctantly calls on him.
'I had bugger all', he says, ' B-U-G-G-E-R-A-L-L'.
The teacher is mortified and scolds Johnny for his rude answer.

Later when the lesson turns to geography, she asks the students some rudimentary questions.
Susan correctly identifies the Capital of Canada . Peter is able to tell her which ocean is off Canada 's east coast.
When it's Johnny's turn, the teacher remembers his rude answer from the nutrition lesson, and decides to give him a very difficult question.
Johnny, she asks, 'Where is the Pakistani border?'
Johnny ponders the question and finally says, 'The Pakistani boarder is in bed with my mother.
That's why I got bugger all for breakfast'.

Tags: Religion, Recipes, Tidbits, Jokes,

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REMINDER FROM GOD:

Our Daily Devotional:

Blessings

1Thessalonians 5:16-18, NKJV: "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

How has God blessed you? Can you think of a particular way, or perhaps even several ways that He has blessed you? Take a moment and give Him thanks for His blessings. Now then, have any of your blessings been times of darkness, pain, or struggle? Can you think of God's blessings in times of sorrow and loss? It's not something we often think of. Nevertheless, the idea is a simple one: if you are a child of God, you are always blessed. You are blessed in the good times, and blessed in the bad times. For as a child of God, there is nothing that comes into your life that God doesn't permit. Everything you experience, every peak and every valley, are all allowed into your life for reasons that God alone may know. But know this, as God's child, you are loved by God. Your Heavenly Father will do nothing to harm you, and in fact, will actively love you through every circumstance of your life. It may not seem easy to associate your darkest times as times of blessings, but try. You may discover anew a wonderful side of God that comes as you are able to give God thanks in everything, and trust Him in all things.

Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
- Isaiah 53:4

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WORD FOR THE DAY:

 compère KOM-pair , noun:
1. A host, master of ceremonies, or the like, especially of a stage revue or television program.

verb:
1. To act as compère for: to compère the new game show.

Just then, the compère got up on the stage and picked up the microphone. "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen…"
-- Kenneth Turpin, Nosy

Then a tall, sidling young man appeared and, after some confusion with the compère, unceremoniously proposed to drink a pint of brown ale without at any point using his hands…
-- Martin Amis, Heavy Water

Compère literally means "godfather" in French. It entered English in the 1730s.

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Hurricane Preparedness: How to Weather the Storm

 June to November is prime time for hurricanes. Relaxing, summer days can quickly turn disastrous, so keep you and your family safe by knowing how to get ready.

Severe hurricane damage occurs from strong winds and rain, flash flooding and potential landslides. Tornados can occur along the path of the hurricane as well as storm surges along the coast. As a result, both inland and coastal communities face risks this season. The best way for you to stay safe is to be prepared.
What do I need to do to be prepared?

Form a communication plan with your family - An emergency can strike at any time. Make sure everyone in your family has a way of contacting each other, whether it's via a cell phone or a phone card. Coordinate with your children's day care or schools, and place an emergency contact card in their backpacks. If possible, identify an emergency contact person who is outside of your area so that everyone has a back-up, central point of communication.

Know your resources - Each community has an evacuation plan, and many also offer emergency shelters. If you need to leave your home or community, learn the best exit routes. Also, find out where local emergency shelters are located.

Assemble an emergency kit - and don't wait until the last minute! Here are a few suggestions:

    Water and non-perishable food items
    Small amount of cash - ATMs and credit card machines may be inoperable
    Weather radio
    First-aid kit and family prescriptions
    Flashlights, lanterns, and batteries
    Blankets
    At least one change of clothes
    Hygiene and sanitation products
    Copies (front and back) of your identification and credit cards
    Full tank of gasoline
    Cards, toys, and other small recreational items, especially if you have children

And don't forget to plan for your pets! Make sure Fluffy has her carrier and enough food and water, too. Ideally, the supplies in the emergency kit should last at least three days and should be restocked or replaced at least once per year.
What should I do when I know a storm is coming?

Stay informed. The National Hurricane Center and local news stations issue constant weather updates. You can also sign up to receive alerts on your phone. Follow instructions issued by local officials - if evacuations are ordered, leave immediately!

Protect your home and your belongings. Safeguarding windows are a priority. If broken, strong winds may enter your house and pry open the roof. It's best to cover windows with either shutters or plywood. Taping windows doesn't prevent windows from breaking. Trim shrubbery and trees, and keep drain pipes clear. This will diminish debris and keep the heavy amounts of water from damming up. And either tie down or bring inside any loose items in your lawn. Storms spring up quickly, so there's no such thing as taking too many preventative measures.

For more information on preparing for severe weather, visit Ready.Gov.
 
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RECIPE:

Tomato, Onion, and Cucumber Salad


Total Time:    5 min
Prep    5 min   

Yield:    4 servings

Ingredients

    5 medium plum tomatoes, halved lengthwise, seeded, and thinly sliced
    1/4 red onion, peeled, halved lengthwise, and thinly sliced
    1 Kirby cucumber, halved lengthwise and thinly sliced
    A generous drizzle of extra-virgin olive oil, about 2 tablespoons
    2 splashes red wine vinegar
    Coarse salt and black pepper

Directions

Dress the tomatoes, onions, and cucumber with olive oil, red wine vinegar, salt, and pepper.

Let stand while you prepare dinner, about 20 minutes. Re-toss and serve salad with crusty bread for mopping up juices and oil.

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Chicken Parmesan Heroes

Chicken Parmesan Ingredients
To make my chicken Parmesan heroes (for a family of 4) you will need:

    2 loaves of Italian bread
    2 lbs. of chicken cutlets (breast meat fillets)
    26 oz. of your favorite tomato sauce
    16 oz. of mozzarella cheese
    2 eggs
    a dollop of milk
    bread crumbs seasoned with Italian herbs and Parmesan for coating the chicken
    olive oil - about an eighth of an inch to a quarter of an inch of olive oil depending on the thickness to fry the cutlets

Prepare the Chicken Cutlets
First you have to wash your chicken cutlets. Then you have to make a mixture of 2 eggs and a dollop of milk which you whisk so you can coat your chicken cutlets. Then coat the cutlets in a layer of Italian seasoned breadcrumbs. Cook on medium heat for about 10 minutes - 5 minutes on each side or until each side reaches that golden brown color.

Rest the cutlets on a plate with 2 paper towels – so the extra olive oil can be soaked into the paper.

Next, begin to heat your oven at 275 degrees. While the oven is pre-heating, heat your sauce briefly on the stove using low heat.

Arrange the Chicken Parmesan Cheese
Now take your fresh mozzarella and cut enough pieces to cover all of the hero sandwiches with the delicious cheese – at home you can be as generous as you like.

Arrange the Chicken Parmesan Sandwiches
I like to use bread baking pans or anything similar to cook the heroes in – this way they don't fall all over the place and it makes it easier to close them up when they come out of the oven. Lay the bread in the pan lengthwise, pour some tomato sauce across (not to much sauce but some to flavor the other side). Lay your cooked chicken cutlets on the bread. Pour some tomato sauce across and top with your cheese.

Bake the Chicken Parmesan Heroes
Cook in the oven for 10 minutes or until the cheese has melted and the bread is toasty. I really enjoy making these at home and I can't wait to eat these with my family

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Fire House Salsa Bars

These chewy oatmeal bars have an added kick of flavor with Pace® Salsa and apricot preserves.

Serves: 24 servings (2 bars each)
Prep Time: 15 minutes
Cook Time: 40 minutes
   
     
 
1/2 large ripe banana, cut up
1 cup Pace® Chunky Salsa
1 teaspoon cornstarch
1/2 cup apricot preserves
1 cup Butter, softened (2 sticks)
1/2 teaspoon ground allspice
1 cup packed brown sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 cups self-rising all-purpose flour
1 cup coarsely crumbled gingersnap cookie (about 14 cookies)
1 cup quick-cooking oats

DIRECTIONS:

Place the banana, salsa, cornstarch and preserves into a food processor. Cover and process for 30 seconds or until the mixture is smooth.
Beat the butter, allspice, sugar and vanilla extract in a medium bowl with an electric mixer on medium speed until the mixture is fluffy. Reduce the speed to low. Stir in the flour, cookie crumbs and oats and mix until crumbs form.
Press all but 1/3 cup crumb mixture into a 3-quart shallow baking pan. Top with the salsa mixture. Sprinkle with the remaining crumb mixture.
Bake at 350°F. for 40 minutes or until the topping is browned. Cool in the pan on a wire rack. Cut into 48 bars.

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Tomato Cucumber Salad

Simple and refreshing, this tomato cucumber salad is a great picnic salad or accompaniment to grilled lean meat, fish or chicken.

Prep Time: 10 minutes
Total Time: 10 minutes

Ingredients:

    4 roma or vine ripe tomatoes
    1 medium cucumber
    2 tbsp balsamic vinegar
    1 tsp extra-virgin olive oil
    1/4 tsp sugar
    2 tsp chopped fresh basil
    Freshly ground black pepper to taste

Preparation:

Slice tomatoes and cucumber thinly and place in a medium bowl. Combine vinegar, oil and sugar. Drizzle over sliced tomatoes and cucumber. Toss, then sprinkle with chopped basil. Refrigerate or serve at room temperature.

Serves 4

Per Serving: Calories 58, Calories from Fat 14, Total Fat 1.6g (sat 0.3g), Cholesterol 0mg, Sodium 12mg, Carbohydrate 9.4g, Fiber 1.9g, Protein 1.6g

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Pickled Corn


yield: Makes 12 servings

This unexpected brined corn is a terrific foil alongside rich and smoky grilled dishes. Start at least four days ahead so that fermentation can go... more ›

Ingredients

    6 ears of corn, husked, cut crosswise into about 1 1/2" rounds
    5 1/2 tablespoons kosher salt plus more
    10 garlic cloves
    2 red chiles (such as jalapeño or Fresno), cut crosswise into thin rounds, seeded
    1 teaspoon whole black peppercorns

Preparation

Cook corn in a large pot of lightly salted boiling water until crisp-tender, about 4 minutes. Using a slotted spoon, transfer to a bowl of ice water. Let cool; drain.
Layer corn, garlic, chiles, and peppercorns in a 4-quart glass or ceramic jar.
Stir 5 1/2 tablespoons salt and 2 quarts water in a large bowl until salt is dissolved. Pour over corn mixture. Place several plates or small bowls over vegetables to keep them submerged by at least 2". Cover jar with plastic wrap or a lid and let stand in a dark, cool place such as a cellar, closet, or pantry at room temperature (68°F–70°F is ideal) for 4 days to pickle; taste corn. Want more pucker? Let it sit for 1–2 more days, then serve or refrigerate for up to 3 weeks.


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How to Bread and Fry a Chicken Cutlet

Ingredients

You'll need:

    2 pounds boneless, skinless chicken breast
    1/2 cup milk
    1 cup marinara
    1 cup Italian-style bread crumbs
    2 Tbsp olive oil
    1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese

The spices you'll need are:

    1 Tbsp minced fresh parsley
    1 tsp dried basil
    1 tsp oregano
    1/2 tsp garlic powder
    1/4 tsp red pepper
    Salt and ground black pepper to taste

Prepare the Chicken Cutlet for Frying
To begin, arrange the chicken on a sheet of wax paper. Cover with another sheet of paper and pound the chicken to a 1/2-inch thickness. Now, dip chicken in the milk. Shake off any extra. Dredge in bread crumbs. Place on a large platter. Refrigerate for 1/2 an hour for the crust to set. Preheat the oven to 375°. Coat a 9 x 13-inch baking dish with vegetable oil. Cover the bottom with 1/3 of the marinara. Now set the dish aside for later.

Fry the Breaded Chicken Cutlet
Heat a large, heavy skillet over medium-high heat. When hot, add half of the olive oil and swirl to coat the bottom of the pan. Quickly brown each of the chicken, turning only one time. Save the remainder of the olive oil for the second batch. Arrange the browned chicken in the bottom of the dish; try to avoid overlapping the chicken. Pour the remaining marina evenly over chicken, then sprinkle with parsley, basil, oregano, garlic powder, red pepper, salt, and pepper. Finish with the mozzarella. Bake uncovered for 15 to 20 minutes or until chicken is heated through and the cheese is bubbly and a little golden. Let the chicken cool for 5 minutes before serving.

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JOKES:

I wanted to know the difference between a cappucino and a latte so I looked it up. Here's what I found :

A latte is a coffee beverage prepared with 1/4 espresso, 1/2 steamed milk, and 1/4 of milk foam on top. Flavors are also sometimes added.
A cappuccino is a coffee beverage prepared with 1/3 espresso, 1/3 steamed milk and a 1/3 milk foam. Cappuccino's can also be made "wet", meaning with more than the usual amount of steamed milk, or "dry" meaning with more than the usual amount of milk foam.


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THINGS TO PONDER:     If you keep trying to prove Murphy's law, will something go wrong?


CONFUCIUS QUOTE:   The strength of a nation derives from the integrity of the home.

You might be a REDNECK if...
        ...three quarters of the clothes you own have LOGOS on them.

"Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered,
you will never grow."  - Ronald E. Osborn

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Marketing 101
 
One buzz word in today's business world is MARKETING.
However, people often ask for a simple explanation of "Marketing." Well, here it is:
 
 
* You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party.
    You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed."
   That's Direct Marketing.
 
 
* You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy.
   One of your friends goes up to him and, pointing at you, says, "She's fantastic in bed."
   That's Advertising.
 
 
* You see a handsome guy at a party.
   You go up to him and get his telephone number.
   The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed."
   That's Telemarketing.
 
 
* You see a guy at a party; you straighten your dress.
   You walk up to him and pour him a drink.
   You say, "May I?" and reach up to straighten his tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm,and then say,
   "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed."
   That's Public Relations.
 
 
* You're at a party and see a handsome guy.
   He walks up to you and says, "I hear you're fantastic in bed."
   That's Brand Recognition.
 
 
* You're at a party and see a handsome guy.
   He fancies you, but you talk him into going home with your friend.
   That's a Sales Rep.
 
 
* Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you.
   That's Tech Support.
 
* You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be handsome men in all these houses you're passing,
   so you climb onto the roof of one situated towards the center and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!"
   That's Junk Mail.
 
 
* You are at a party; this attractive older man walks up to you and grabs your ass.
   That's a former United States President.
   You like it, but twenty years later your attorney decides you were offended and you are awarded a settlement.
   That's America! 


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Retired Marine and former Pan Am/Delta Pilot John Lovell is Top Gun at Subway  Sandwich Shop Plantation , Florida :
Last week police were called to investigate an attempted armed robbery: The 71-year-old retired
Marine who opened fire on two robbers at a Plantation , Florida ,
Subway shop late Wednesday, killing one and critically wounding
the other, is described as John Lovell, a former helicopter
pilot for two presidents. He doesn't drink, he doesn't smoke,
and he works out every day. Mr. Lovell was a man of action Wednesday night.
 
According to Plantation police, two masked gunmen came into the
Subway at1949 N. Pine Rd. just after 11 p.m. There was a lone
diner, Mr. Lovell, who was finishing his meal. After robbing
the cashier, the two men attempted to shove Mr. Lovell into a
bathroom and rob him as well. They got his money, but then Mr.
Lovell pulled his handgun and opened fire. He shot one of the
thieves in the head and chest and the other in the head.
 
When police arrived, they found one of the men in the shop, K-9
Units found the other in the bushes of a nearby business. They
also found cash strewn around the front of the sandwich shop
according to Detective Robert Rettig of the Plantation Police
Department.
 
Both men were taken to the Broward General Medical Center ,
where one, Donicio Arrindell, 22, of North Lauderdale died. The
other, 21-year-old Frederick Gadson of Fort Lauderdale is in
critical but stable condition.
 
Mr. Lovell was a pilot in the Marine Corps, flying former
Presidents John F. Kennedy and Lyndon B. Johnson. He later
worked as a pilot for Pan Am and Delta Airlines.
 
He is not expected to be charged authorities said. ''He was in
fear for his life,'' Detective Rettig said, "These criminals
ought to realize that most men in their 70's have military
backgrounds and aren't intimidated by idiots."
 
Something tells me this old Marine wasn't 'in fear for his
life', even though his life was definitely at risk. The only
thing he could be charged with is participating in an unfair
fight. One 71- year young Marine against two punks. Two head
shots and one center body mass shot.
 
Outstanding shooting! That'll teach them not to get between a
Marine and his meal.
 
Florida law allows eligible citizens to carry a concealed
weapon. Don't you just love a story with a happy ending?
 
Old people don't fight, they just shoot straight.
 
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45 Lessons Life Taught Me
 
1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
 
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
 
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
 
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
 
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
 
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
 
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
 
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it. 
 
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
 
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
 
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
 
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry
 
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about. 
 
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
 
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
 
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
 
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful. 
 
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
 
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else. 
 
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
 
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets . Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
 
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow. 
 
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple. 
 
24. The most important organ is the brain. 
 
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
 
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'
 
27. Always choose life. 
 
28. Forgive everyone everything.
 
29. What other people think of you is none of your business. 
 
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time. 
 
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
 
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does. 
 
33. Believe in miracles. 
 
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do. 
 
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
 
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young. 
 
37. Your children get only one childhood. 
 
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
 
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
 
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back. 
 
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
 
42. The best is yet to come...
 
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up. 
 
44. Yield.
 
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

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THE OSTRICH
 
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him.
 
The waitress asks them for their orders.
 
The man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?"
 
I'll have the same," says the ostrich.
 
A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will be $9.40 please."  The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.
 
 
The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries and a coke."
 
The ostrich says, "I'll have the same."
 
Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.
 
 
This becomes routine until the two enter again. "The usual?" asks the waitress.
 
"No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad," says the man.
 
"Same," says the ostrich.
 
Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be $32.62."
 
Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.
 
 
The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?"
 
"Well," says  the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything,
 
I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there."
 
"That's  brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!"
 
"That's right..Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man.
 
The waitress asks, "What's with the ostrich?"
 
The man sighs, pauses and answers, "My second wish was for a tall chick with a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say.."

Tags: Religion, Recipes, Tidbits, Jokes,

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REMINDER FROM GOD:

A Reminder About Healing

"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective."1

Does God heal people today? Let me answer by first asking another question, "Does God answer prayer today?" My answer is, "Sometimes, 'yes.' Sometimes, 'no.' Sometimes, 'wait a while,' and sometimes, 'you're praying the wrong prayer!'" James in the Bible wrote about prayer saying, "You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures."2 In other words, when we don't get prayer answered, sometimes it is because of false motives or simply that we're praying amiss; that is, we're praying the wrong prayer.

The same principle applies to prayer for healing. Sicknesses can have many causes for the simple reason that we live in a sin-sick, broken world. And, as it rains "on the just and on the unjust alike,"3 sickness also "rains" on the just as well as the unjust.

However, we can avoid many sicknesses by living a wholesome life, resolving impaired relationships, putting wrongs right, avoiding stress, and resolving super-charged repressed negative emotions such as guilt, hurt, anger, hostility, jealousy, irrational fears, and other sins of the spirit. This is why the Bible, God's Word, makes it clear that before we even pray for healing, we need to confess all sins to God (and, at least, to one safe person)—including the sins of the spirit—in order to clear the way for healing.

In my many years of being involved in church life from childhood until the present, and having heard a number of "faith healers" in years past, I have never heard one of these preachers even mention James's instructions regarding the necessity to confess one's sins to one another before ever praying for healing.

As I have shared before, I grew up in a very dysfunctional family and was taught early in life to bury and deny my negative feelings, but when I realized the fallacy of this teaching, and got in touch with my "super-charged repressed negative emotions," and confessed them in a growth support group as well as to a counselor, I was healed of several years of miserable hay fever and painful bursitis. In fact, I am physically healthier today than when I was half my age, for which I truly thank God that I followed the biblical principle for healing.

The fact is that some sicknesses (not all by any means) are symptoms of a deeper fault, sin, or unresolved problem. In these situations the prayer for healing needs to be directed not merely towards the symptom, but on the deeper cause (or causes) which need/s to be confessed and resolved to clear the way for healing.

Being honest with one's self, with God, and with at least one trusted person is the righteous thing to do; and such prayers are truly powerful and effective.1

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, whenever I have any unresolved problems, issues, or sicknesses, please confront me with the truth of any cause in me that might be in any way contributing to or causing the problem I am experiencing; give me the courage to see it, to confess it to a safe person, and the help to resolve it so that I can be healed. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. James 5:16 (NIV).
2. James 4:3 (NKJV).
3. Matthew 5:45 (NLT).

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WORD FOR THE DAY:

    belaud
    audio pronunciation
    bih-LAWD

    DEFINITION

verb
: to praise usually to excess

    EXAMPLES

Supporters belauded the idea as a magic bullet for all social problems in the country.

"Several cheers went up. Piccard, unaware of the scene unfolding behind him, seemed to think they were meant to belaud his plan." — From Jake Silverstein's 2011 book Nothing Happened and Then It Did: A Chronicle in Fact and Fiction

    DID YOU KNOW?

You may recognize the word "laud" (meaning "to praise or extol") in "belaud." In fact, "belaud" was formed by combining the prefix "be-" and the verb "laud." Since "be-" can denote both "to a greater degree" and "excessively or ostentatiously," it perhaps should come as no surprise that while "laud" may imply praise to a deserved degree, "belaud" often has the connotations of unreasonable or undeserved praise. Incidentally, both "laud" and by extension "belaud" derive from the Latin verb "laudere," which in turn traces back to "laud-," meaning "praise." Other descendants of "laud-" in English include "laudatory," "laudable," and even "laudation," meaning "an act of praising."

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When is Labor Day 2012? Here is a chart of the exact dates for 2012–2015.

When did Labor Day start? Why is it celebrated?

Traditionally, Labor Day consists of barbecues, camping, and preparing for the new school year. Check out some of the Almanac's great nature links to guide you in your outdoor activities, including fishing, camping, and weather watching.

Then, get that grill sizzling with some of our grilling tips and recipes to help you celebrate!

Labor Day Dates

Year     Labor Day

2012     Monday, September 3
2013     Monday, September 2
2014     Monday, September 1
2015     Monday, September 7

Labor Day History

Always the first Monday in September, Labor Day was the idea of Peter J. Maguire (although recent research has shown that it might have been his brother Matthew's idea), a labor union leader who in 1882 proposed a celebration honoring the American worker. The date chosen was simply "convenient," according to Maguire, because it was midway between the Fourth of July and Thanksgiving. Although the day's focus on organized labor has diminished over the years, the legal holiday still marks the end of summer and the traditional time for children to return to school.

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9 Reasons Why You Should No Longer Care About People’s Approval
 
“A truly strong person does not need the approval of others any more than a lion needs the approval of sheep.” Vernon Howard

Approval Seeking Behavior… If you ask me, this is where many of our challenges start. When you are too concerned with what other people think of you, you start sabotaging your life, and you start moving forward but with the breaks on.

“Care about people’s approval and you will be their prisoner”  Lao Tzu

If you want to live life the way WE want to and not the way others would want us to, we need to let go of our constant need to control what other people think of us, we need to learn to let go of our approval seeking behavior. I know that this is not always an easy task to do and that is exactly why I decided to write about the 9 reasons why you should no longer care about what others think or say of you, to point out some of the things we all know but we just need to be reminded of from time to time.

1. You Simply Can’t Be Liked by Everybody

No matter how much you try and no matter how “nice” you are with people, you simply can’t have everybody like you for there will always be people who will continue talking about you and your “inappropriate” way of thinking, behaving, breathing, dressing, living, etc.

“You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.” Winston Churchill

2. You Can Live a Happy Life Without “Their” Approval

You are not less or more of a person based on how many people like and approve of you. While growing up we were told that in order to be liked by others we must be nice to people and we are, but somehow we keep encountering people that don’t seem to like us. So why is that? Is there something wrong with us? Not really. Just because some people don’t like us, does not imply that there is something wrong with us, for that is not true. You are already, whole and complete and you don’t need other people’s approval in order to feel this way. How freeing is that?

“Self-worth comes from one thing – thinking that you are worthy.” Wayne Dyer

3. You Can’t Control What Other People Think of You

 I came to the realization that we all live in different worlds, a different reality for each and every one of us, reality that was built based on our thoughts, beliefs, experiences, based on what we were taught while growing up. What I might see as being right, other people might see as being wrong, and what I might see as being beautiful other people might see as being ugly.

We all have a different perception on how life should be lived and how people should act, and instead of wasting your time thinking about what other people think and say of you, why not spend that time improving and growing yourself, knowing that: “Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocre minds. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence.” Einstein

4. Approval Seeking Behavior is Time Consuming

It take a lot of your time, time that can be used to do the things that you really enjoy doing.

5. Approval Seeking Behavior Drains Your Energy.

Every time you spend time thinking and talking about what X or Y said about you, not only are you wasting your time, but you are also wasting your precious energy.

6. Freedom to Be Who You Want to Be

When you no longer care about what other people think of you, you start being yourself and you start behaving the way you always wanted but you couldn’t because of all the restrictions and limits you imposed on yourself. You have no idea how much freedom comes with letting go of your need to control what other people think of you. Just give it a chance and you will understand what I am talking about.

7. Inner Peace

We all seek peace and we all want to be happy and the moment you stop caring about what “they” think, you will find just that.

“When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others.” Peace Pilgrim

8. You Are The One In Control of Your Life, Not Them!

Mind your own business and live your life, the way you want to, the way it best suits you, and let go of your approval seeking behavior.

“The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you’ll be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.” Arthur Gordon

9. The ONLY Person You Must Get Approval From Is YOU!

If you like and approve of yourself, believe me, it will no longer matter if people say nice things about you or not, for you will understand: “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” Carl Jung

You get to a point where you know, them talking about you has little or nothing to do with how you think, act, live, etc., but a lot to do with how they think, and who they perceive reality. A lot of times, what we can’t accept in others are the things we haven’t accepted in ourselves, whether we are consciously aware of this truth or not.

“When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself as someone who needs to judge.” Wayne Dyer

 
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RECIPE:

Pickled Corn


yield: Makes 12 servings

This unexpected brined corn is a terrific foil alongside rich and smoky grilled dishes. Start at least four days ahead so that fermentation can go... more ›

Ingredients

    6 ears of corn, husked, cut crosswise into about 1 1/2" rounds
    5 1/2 tablespoons kosher salt plus more
    10 garlic cloves
    2 red chiles (such as jalapeño or Fresno), cut crosswise into thin rounds, seeded
    1 teaspoon whole black peppercorns

Preparation

Cook corn in a large pot of lightly salted boiling water until crisp-tender, about 4 minutes. Using a slotted spoon, transfer to a bowl of ice water. Let cool; drain.
Layer corn, garlic, chiles, and peppercorns in a 4-quart glass or ceramic jar.
Stir 5 1/2 tablespoons salt and 2 quarts water in a large bowl until salt is dissolved. Pour over corn mixture. Place several plates or small bowls over vegetables to keep them submerged by at least 2". Cover jar with plastic wrap or a lid and let stand in a dark, cool place such as a cellar, closet, or pantry at room temperature (68°F–70°F is ideal) for 4 days to pickle; taste corn. Want more pucker? Let it sit for 1–2 more days, then serve or refrigerate for up to 3 weeks.


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Tomato Tarte Tatin Recipe

    2 medium yellow onions, chopped
    2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil or clarified butter

    1 1/2 pounds / 24 oz small tomatoes (here it's a mix of heirloom cherry & early girls)

    scant 1/2 teaspoon fine grain sea salt
    2 teaspoons balsamic vinegar
    a bit of flour
    zest of one lemon

    1 pie crust, this rye crust is my go-to
    1 egg whisked with a tablespoon of water

Preheat the oven to 400F / 205C.

While the oven is warming, uses a large skillet over medium heat to saute the onions and a couple pinches of salt in the oil/clarified butter. Cook, stirring regularly, until the onions are deeply golden and caramelized, 10-15 minutes. Remove from heat.

While the onions are cooking, cut any larger early girl tomatoes in half. I typically leave the small cherry tomatoes whole. Add to the caramelized onions along with the sea salt and balsamic vinegar. Transfer to a 10 or 11-inch cast iron skillet or equivalent deep pie dish. If you get the sense that your tomatoes are quite juicy, and might release a lot of liquid, you can toss the mixture with a tablespoon or two of flour at this point. Sprinkle mixture with lemon zest.

Roll out your pie dough, and use it to cover the tomato mixture - tucking in the sides a bit. Brush the crust with the egg wash, cut a few decorative slits in the crust, and bake in the top third of the oven until the crust is deeply golden and the tomatoes are bubbling a bit at the sides, 25 - 30 minutes.

Serves 6-8.

Prep time: 10 min - Cook time: 45 min

NOTE or TRY: 

 - Skip the balsamic, add 1 - 2 tablespoons harissa & more zest.

- Add a generous drizzle of herb oil before topping with crust.

- Add some cheese, dollops of ricotta or grated gruyere before topping with crust.

- Instead of topping with a pie crust, top with biscuit dough instead of pie crust (there's a good yogurt biscuit recipe in Super Natural Every Day).

- Or, top with a savory version of a crumble topping - skip the sugar in the crumble.


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Old-fashioned Butterscotch Pie
   
 
Active Time:  20 Minutes
Total Time:  5 Hours 35 Minutes
Yield:  Makes 8 servings

If you like the deep, rich taste of brown sugar, use dark brown sugar in this recipe; otherwise, prepare it with light brown sugar for a lighter color and flavor.

INGREDIENTS
.
Fully Baked Pastry Shell

For Filling:
1 1/2 cups packed brown sugar
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/8 teaspoon salt
3 beaten egg yolks
1 1/2 cups milk
2 tablespoons margarine or butter
1 teaspoon vanilla

For Meringue:
3 egg whites
1/4 teaspoon cream of tartar
6 tablespoons sugar

DIRECTIONS

FOR FILLING: Prepare and fully bake pastry shell as directed; set aside to cool. In a heavy, medium saucepan stir together the brown sugar, flour, and salt. Add egg yolks and milk. Cook while stirring with a wire whisk till thickened and bubbly. (Mixture may appear curdled. Stir briskly while cooking and mixture will become smooth.) Cook and stir 2 minutes more. Remove from heat. Stir in margarine or butter and vanilla. Pour hot filling into baked pastry shell.

FOR MERINGUE: In a mixing bowl beat egg whites and cream of tartar with an electric mixer on medium speed about 1 minute, or till soft peaks form (tips curl). Gradually add sugar, 1 tablespoon at a time, beating on high speed about 4 minutes more, or till mixture forms stiff, glossy peaks (tips stand straight) and sugar completely dissolves. Immediately spread meringue over hot filling, spreading to edge of pastry to seal and prevent shrinkage.

Bake pie in a preheated 350 degrees oven for 15 minutes. Cool on a rack for 1 hour. Chill 3-6 hours before serving. Store in the refrigerator.

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Cantaloupe Ice Pops

Active Time:  20 Minutes
Total Time:  1 Hour 30 Minutes
Yield:  eight 2-ounce pops

Finely slivered mint adds a delightfully pretty flair when frozen within these cantaloupe ice pops.

 INGREDIENTS
1   small cantaloupe
1/2 cup  water
1/4 cup  sugar
1 tablespoon  finely slivered fresh mint leaves
1/4-1/3 cup  lemon juice depending on the sweetness of the melon
   
DIRECTIONS
Cut cantaloupe in half; remove and discard the seeds. Scoop out the flesh and transfer to a food processor. Puree until smooth; measure 1 1/3 cups puree and transfer to a small bowl.

Pour water into a small saucepan, add sugar and bring to a boil over high heat. Stir in mint and immediately remove from the heat. Let stand for 1 minute.

Stir the mint syrup and lemon juice into the cantaloupe puree in the bowl. Pour the mixture into 8 individual frozen-treat molds or small (2-ounce) paper cups.

Freeze until beginning to set, about 1 hour. Insert frozen-treat sticks and freeze until completely firm. Dip the molds briefly in hot water before unmolding.

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Salmon Club Sandwiches
   
Active Time:  40 Minutes
Total Time:  2 Hours
Yield:  4


 INGREDIENTS

2 tablespoons  extra-virgin olive oil
1   medium onion coarsely chopped
2 tablespoons  tamarind concentrate
2   garlic cloves coarsely chopped
2   dried chipotle chiles stems and seeds discarded
3/4 cup  golden raisins
1/4 cup  tomato paste
1/4 cup  agave syrup see Note
1/2 teaspoon  pure chile powder
salt and freshly ground pepper
4   skinless 4-ounce salmon fillets halved crosswise
12 slices  of whole wheat toast
1/4 cup  mayonnaise
1 cup  arugula leaves
4 slices  of beefsteak tomato

Tip: Sweet agave syrup, made from agave plants, is available at health-food stores. One Serving 662 cal, 28 gm fat, 3.7 gm sat fat, 48 gm carb, 7 gm fiber.
   
DIRECTIONS

In a saucepan, heat the oil. Add the onion and cook over moderate heat until softened. Add the tamarind, garlic, chipotles, raisins, tomato paste, agave and chile powder. Bring to a boil and simmer over low heat until thick, 20 minutes. Let cool, then puree in a blender. Season with salt and pepper.

Set the salmon in a large, shallow dish and season with salt and pepper. Coat with 1/2 cup of the sauce; refrigerate for 1 hour.

Light a grill and oil the grates. Grill the salmon over high heat, turning once and basting with another 1/2 cup of the sauce, until just cooked through, 4 minutes.

For each club, use 3 slices of toast; spread each with 1 teaspoon of mayonnaise and layer with the arugula, tomato and fish.


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Peach Tart

A lovely tart that uses both fresh peaches and peach preserves.

Serves: 8 to 10
Prep Time: 10 minutes
Cook Time: 25 minutes
   
INGREDIENTS:

2 eggs, well beaten
2 cups sour cream
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon almond extract
1 cup Smucker's Peach Preserves
1 11- inch unbaked pastry shell or 12 3-inch unbaked pastry shells
2 cups peeled, thinly sliced fresh peaches
toasted slivered almonds
2 tablespoons brown sugar


DIRECTIONS

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.

Combine the eggs, sour cream, and vanilla and almond extracts and blend well. Fold in preserves.

Spoon into pastry shell and spread evenly. Arrange the fresh peaches on top of the tart. Sprinkle the top with almonds and brown sugar.

Bake for 25 to 30 minutes, or until mixture is set. Let cool to room temperature on a wire rack. Refrigerate for at least 2 hours before serving.

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JOKES:

A man asked his wife what she'd like for her birthday. "I'd love to be eight again." she replied. On the morning of her birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her off to the local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, every thing there was. Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. Right away, they journeyed to a McDonald's where her loving husband ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake. Then it was off to the movies: the latest Star Wars epic, a hot dog, popcorn, all the Coke she could drink, and her favorite M&M's. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted. He leaned over his precious wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, Well, Dear, what was it like being eight again?" Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. "I meant my dress size!!!!!!!

The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he's gonna get it wrong.

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Friendship between women: A woman doesn’t come home one night. The next day she tells her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house.
The husband calls his wife's 10 best friends. None of them know anything about it.

Friendship between men: A man doesn’t come home one night. The next day he tells his wife that he had slept over at a friend’s house. The wife calls her husband's 10 best men friends. Eight of them confirm that he had slept over, and two claim that he was still there.

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A guy walks in to the Barbershop. Barber says, "What will it be today?" Guy says, "well I want it going with my waves on top, faded on one side, plug the other, and just make it all out of shape and messed up." Barber says, "Now why in the world do you want your hair cut like that."

Guy says, "That’s how you cut it last time"

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A man wanted to prove to a group of alcoholics the effect of alcohol in human body system. He brought two jars; one containing water and the other containing alcohol, along with a very healthy worm. He said to the audience:

"This jar contain water"
He dropped the worm in the jar and said, "Please watch the reaction". The worm swam to the side of the jar and up it floats dangling and swimming.

The man took the worm out of the first jar and put it in the second jar containing alcohol and said to the audience " now watch the reaction" The worm went right down into the water and struggled for survival. There and then every body saw the worm shrinking and dis-integrating, and in one word, died.

The man turned round an asked the audience " what would you all say to this".

After a long silence, someone from the rear stood up and said
" I can see that if I drink alcohol, there will be no more worn in my body".

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A schoolteacher was trying to teach her six-year old class students how to say the pledge of allegiance to the flag. The schoolteacher said, O.K. children begin by putting your hand over your little heart and repeat with me, I pledge allegiance to the HOLD IT! HOLD IT! Johnny, why is your hand over your butt cheek instead of your heart? Johnny relied! I can’t. Teacher asks, why not? Well you see, when my ant comes over to pick me up and pats my bottom and says, BLESS YOUR LITTLE HEART!!!!!!

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One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Johnny was standing and
staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church.
The young man of seven had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the
pastor walked up and stood beside him. Gazing up at the plaque, too, he
said quietly, "Good morning son."

"Good morning pastor" replied the young man, not taking his eyes off
the plaque. "Sir, what is this?" Johnny asked.

"Well son, these are all the people who have died in the service," replied the pastor. Soberly, they stood together staring up at the large plaque.
Little Johnny's voice barely broke the silence when he asked quietly,
"Which one sir, the 8:30 or the 10:30 service?"

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A couple is in bed sleeping when there's a rat-a-tat-tat on the door.
The husband rolls over and looks at the clock, and it's half past 3 in the morning.” I’m not getting out of bed at this time," he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. So he drags himself out of bed, goes downstairs, opens the door, and there's a man standing there. It didn't take the homeowner long to realize the man was drunk.
"Hi there," slurs the stranger, "Can you give me a push?" "No, get lost. It's half past three and I was in bed," says the man as he slams the door. He goes back up to bed and tell his wife what happened and she says, "That wasn't very nice of you. Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up from the baby-sitter and you had to knock on that man's house to get us started again? What would have happened if he'd told us to get lost?"
"But the guy was drunk," says the husband.
"It doesn't matter," says the wife.” He needs our help and it would be the Christian thing to help him." So the husband gets out of bed again, gets dressed, and goes downstairs.
He opens the door, and not being able to see the stranger anywhere,
He shouts, "Hey, do you still want a push?"
And he hears a voice cry out, "Yeah, please."
So, still being unable to see the stranger he shouts, "Where are you?" The drunk replies, "Over here, on the swing."

Tags: Religion, Recipes, Tidbits, Jokes,

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REMINDER FROM GOD:

Hammer Theology

"The reason you don't have what you want is that you don't ask God for it. And even when you do ask, you don't get it because your whole motive is wrong—you want only what will give you pleasure."1

People who provide simplistic solutions to life's complex problems can leave a trail of hurt people in their path. I heard a so-called "faith healer" tell a woman who had just experienced a major stroke that the reason she wasn't healed after he prayed for her was because she (and not he) lacked faith. I mean, how cruel can you get?

I attended a lecture on healing attended by some 300 people, all in some form of ministry. At one point during the lecture the speaker asked all those not feeling well to stand. About 50 people stood—including me. The speaker called on the demon of sickness to be "cast out" en masse. He then told all those who had been healed to sit down. All but nine or ten of us sat down. One by one he then "cast out" the demon of sickness and told the individual to sit down if he had been healed. One by one they sat down. Then came my turn! He then "cast" the demon of sickness out of me. Nothing happened. The pressure to conform and lie was incredible. I refused to do so. I told the speaker that I still felt sick and that I thought my upset stomach was because of a new medication I was on, and I sat down. He moved on to the next person. During the following break one attendee thanked me for not yielding to the pressure to conform.

I've heard another well-known speaker teach that the answer to personal problems was to be filled with the Holy Spirit, and another that the answer to loneliness was to accept Jesus as your Savior. These may be an answer for some situations but certainly not for all. Some of our problems are physical in nature, including biological problems such as a chemical imbalance in the brain; numerous problems are emotional in nature caused by unresolved negative emotions and/or by impaired relationships; and some by a multiple of different spiritual causes. Problems may be caused by a combination of all three of these areas.

The causes of our problems can be very complex and multiple and to tell a person who has appendicitis that he has a demon or doesn't have enough faith to be healed is ignorant, insensitive, cruel and possibly even life-threatening—and certainly not Christian or Christ-like.

As psychologist Abraham Maslow said, "If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail." May I suggest you stay clear of hammer theology—it is neither of the truth nor of God.

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, please help me to be sensitive to the needs of others and never give simplistic solutions to life's complex problems. Help me to understand the nature of human suffering and always seek the truth about the true causes of my own and other's problem, when called for, and thereby pray accordingly. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. James 4:2-3 (NLT).

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WORD FOR THE DAY:

    dundrearies
    audio pronunciation
    dun-DREER-eez

    DEFINITION

noun plural
: long flowing sideburns

    EXAMPLES

Many of the Civil War reenactors were sporting dundrearies to give their costumes a look of authenticity.

"Although as a Victorian man he lacks the vocabulary to express it, he is living out the existentialist crisis, confronting absurdity and nothingness in cravat and dundrearies." — From Thomas C. Foster's 2008 book How to Read Novels Like a Professor: A Jaunty Exploration of the World's Favorite Literary Form

    DID YOU KNOW?

In the United States, Our American Cousin by Tom Taylor is often best remembered as the play Abraham Lincoln was watching at Ford's Theatre in Washington, D.C., when he was assassinated by John Wilkes Booth. Word lovers may also recall that the show gave us "dundrearies," a name for the long, bushy sideburns (called "Piccadilly weepers" in England). The term for that particular men's hair fashion, which was popular between 1840 and 1870, comes from the name of Lord Dundreary, a character in the play who sported those elegant whiskers. The name can also be used in the attributive form "dundreary whiskers."

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 6 Techniques to Stop Worrying
 
Why we worry

When it comes to concerns about life’s uneasy or potentially disastrous issues, we start to worry.  I don’t think there is a single person in this world that hasn’t experienced a copious bout of the worries in their lifetime — but why do we do this?

There could be a number of reasons, some being:

You feel you need to ‘prepare’ yourself for the worst

You are a ‘glass is half empty’ kind of person and just expect the worst to happen

It is in your experience that disaster always strikes, so worry is a necessary coping mechanism

There are so many things that could go wrong and you feel you need to focus on each one to embody it or try to find a possible solution for it in the event of it happening.

Now, if we actually look at this list from an outsiders point of view — in other words, we take ourselves out of the equation and are impartial — these worries are not only a waste of precious manifesting time but they are a reinforcement of unconstructive potential timelines.

You Are What You Think

Just remember you bring about what you think about the most.  This is not meant to scare you, it is a preparation tool so that you can steer your thoughts to more positive neurological pathways.  When you reinforce encouraging scenarios in your mind, as opposed to harmful scenarios (aka worrying), you are creating potential for a more fruitful future.

Easier said than done?

Sure, but it is possible.

Answer this: Has worrying ever solved your problems anyway?

I’m going to take a stab in the dark and say ‘no’ it probably hasn’t, right?  So what can you do now to alleviate any future concerns you have?

Eckhart Tolle has pointed out three memorable and straightforward options that you can apply here, either: remove yourself from the situation (in this case, remove the worry), change it (transmute the worrisome thought form), or accept it totally (surrender to any future possibility).  But let’s go into it a bit more:

Here are 6 simple Techniques you can carry out when you find yourself in a state of worry:

1. Do Something

Swap worry for doing. Can you actually do something about it now?  If the answer is yes, take those first steps and you will begin to lighten the load off your mind.  Even if it means writing the problem down.  Just getting it out of your head and onto paper can be a relief.  You can even then burn the paper or trash it symbolizing your new stance on worry.  Tell your troublesome thought who is the boss!

2. Find a solution

Map out a possible solution. Again, it is always helpful to write it down so that your mind is free of it.  When you can look at some achievable solutions, you may gain a better perspective of how you can change or alter the course of your quandary.

3. Accept

If there is absolutely nothing you can do, then try acceptance of what is.  If you cannot change what is, you need to let it go and find peace within your situation.

4. Meditate

Solutions will present themselves when we quiet the mind.  There is a wealth of information just waiting for you to tap into when you are in a meditative state.   Clearing your mind of what I like to call ‘mind-static’ (continuous loops of mind chatter) will help you to excavate that diamond of truth and gain a lucid perspective.

5. Positive Thinking

Remind yourself that what you think you attract. Do you want to attract more of what you are worrying about? If not, then switch to thinking about what you do want to manifest in your life and let all negative outcomes go.

6. Affirm Happy Outcomes

Practice positive affirmations and visualize your best outcome to the situation at hand.  Keep reaffirming, every morning and evening, this ‘happy outcome’ and truly feel the emotions of having it in your life right now.

“Make sure your thinking is pointing you in the right direction to manifesting your ideal destination”

The mind can be trained to think differently — you are 100% in control of your destiny.  You have a choice to rewire your thought process to align with what you want to manifest — don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.  Don’t fall into the trap of being a ‘victim of circumstance’ — this state doesn’t really exist as you create everything and only you can give it the necessary potency.  Playing any kind of victim role is a disempowering position that you should try to not take part in.

You are the powerful creator of your reality and you are in the driver’s seat — where are you going?  Where do you want to go?  Wherever you see yourself in the future just remember, worrying never got anyone anywhere — so…

Hakuna Matata* all the way!

*a Swahili phrase that is literally translated as “There are no worries”

This article was written by Cherie Roe Dirksen. Cherie is a self-empowerment author, multi-media artist and meditation music composer from Cape Town, South Africa.  She has weekly blogs on her site www.cherieroedirksen.com where she discusses practical and insightful perspectives on taking responsibility for your actions and ultimately living the life you came here to experience.  She also devotes a weekly blog to creativity and the artistic process. You can follow her on Twitter (@cheriedirksen) and Facebook (The Art of Empowerment).

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RECIPE:

Chocolate Mud Cake

As the person who tests many of the recipes we publish, Amy Hamel has been asked to cook any number of dubious dishes. Still, even she was wondering what we were thinking when we asked her to develop a chocolate cake that could be baked in a slow cooker. Why bake in a slow cooker? It's a fun novelty, and kids love the whole idea, but the real proof is in the tasting. Drawing from a number of hot-fudge-brownie cake variations, Amy created a dessert so moist and chocolaty, "it's like getting to lick the batter from a whole cake," as one of our tasters said. But Amy's daughters may have offered the most eloquent testimony. They said nothing, but simply hovered over the crock, each with a spoon in hand and a chocolaty smile on her face.

Ingredients

        1 cup all-purpose flour
        2 teaspoons baking powder
        6 tablespoons butter
        2 ounces semisweet chocolate (or 1/3 cup chocolate chips)
        1 cup sugar (2/3 cup & 1/3 cup, added separately)
        3 tablespoons plus 1/3 cup Dutch-processed cocoa
        1 tablespoon vanilla extract

        1/4 teaspoon salt
        1/3 cup milk
        1 egg yolk
        1/3 cup brown sugar
        11/2 cups hot water
        Whipped cream or ice cream

Instructions

        Coat the inside of a 2 1/2- to 5-quart slow cooker with cooking spray. (Note: the cake's cooking time and final appearance will vary depending on your crock's size.)
        Whisk together the flour and baking powder in a medium bowl and set aside. In a large bowl, melt the butter and chocolate in the microwave or over a pan of simmering water and mix well.
        Whisk in the 2/3 cup of sugar, 3 tablespoons of cocoa, vanilla extract, salt, milk, and egg yolk. Add the flour mixture and stir until thoroughly mixed.
        Pour the batter into the slow cooker and spread it evenly. In a medium bowl, whisk together the remaining sugar, cocoa, and hot water until the sugar is dissolved.
        Pour the mixture over the batter in the slow cooker. Cover and cook on high for 1 to 2 hours, depending on the size of the crock pot.
        Even when done, the cake will be very moist and floating on a layer of molten chocolate, but you'll know it's ready when nearly all of the cake is set and the edges begin to pull away from the sides of the pot. (As you check, try not to let the condensed steam from the lid drip onto the cake.)
        When it's done, turn off the power and remove the lid. Let it cool for 25 minutes, then serve it in bowls topped with whipped cream or ice cream. Makes 6 to 8 servings.


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Harvest Bread


Betty Crocker's Heart Healthy Cookbook shares a recipe! Fruit, nuts and vegetable, all packed into one hearty quick bread! A great on-the-go breakfast made using pineapple, carrots, walnuts and raisins!


    PREP TIME 15 Min
    TOTAL TIME 2 Hr 20 Min
    SERVINGS 16

INGREDIENTS:

1    can (8 ounces) crushed pineapple in juice, drained and juice reserved
1/4    cup fat-free cholesterol-free egg product or 1 egg
2    tablespoons canola or soybean oil
1 1/2    cups Gold Medal® all-purpose flour
3/4    cup packed brown sugar
1/2    cup raisins
1    teaspoon baking powder
1/2    teaspoon baking soda
1/2    teaspoon salt
1/2    teaspoon ground cinnamon
1    cup shredded carrots (1 1/2 medium)
1    cup walnuts, chopped


DIRECTIONS:

    1 Heat oven to 350º. Spray loaf pan, 8 1/2x4 1/2x2 1/2 inches, with cooking spray. Discard 3 tablespoons of the pineapple juice. Mix remaining juice, pineapple, egg product and oil in medium bowl. Stir in remaining ingredients until blended. Spread batter in pan.
    2 Bake 50 to 55 minutes or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes. Remove from pan to wire rack. Cool completely, about 1 hour, before slicing.

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Grandma's Peach French Toast

Ingredients

1 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup butter
2 tablespoons water
1 (29 ounce) can sliced peaches, drained
12 (3/4 inch thick) slices day-old French bread
5 eggs
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1 pinch ground cinnamon, or to taste


Directions

In a saucepan, stir together the brown sugar, butter and water. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat to low, and simmer for 10 minutes, stirring frequently.
Pour the brown sugar mixture into a 9x13 inch baking dish, and tilt the dish to cover the entire bottom. Place peaches in a layer over the sugar coating, then top with slices of French bread. In a medium bowl, whisk together the eggs and vanilla. Slowly pour over the bread slices to coat evenly. Sprinkle cinnamon over the top. Cover and refrigerate for 8 hours or overnight.
Remove the dish from the refrigerator about 30 minutes before baking to come to room temperature. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
Bake for 25 to 30 minutes in the preheated oven, or until the bread is golden brown. Spoon out portions to serve.

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Hamburger Casserole

Ingredients :
1lb lean ground beef
1 can green beans
1 can whole corn
1 can cream of mushroom soup
4 medium potatoes

Directions :
Brown hamburger.Place hamburger in
2 quart casserole dish. Then place
1/2 can of green beans,1/2 can of corn.
put can of cream of mushroom soup and
rest of green beans and corn.
Peel and slice potatoes and put on top.
Cover and bake for 45 min to an hour
at 400 degrees.

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Game-Night Nacho Pizza

Some like it hot with jalapenos; others like it cool with a dollop of sour cream. But one thing’s for sure: This is “nacho” ordinary pizza night. —Jamie Jones, Madison, Georgia

    Prep/Total Time: 20 min.
    Yield: 6 Servings

Ingredients

    1 prebaked 12-inch pizza crust
    1 tablespoon olive oil
    1 cup refried beans
    1 cup refrigerated fully cooked barbecued shredded beef
    1/2 cup chopped seeded tomatoes
    1/2 cup pickled jalapeno slices
    1 cup (4 ounces) shredded Colby-Monterey Jack cheese
    Shredded lettuce, sour cream and salsa, optional

Directions

    Place crust on an ungreased pizza pan. Brush with oil. Spread beans over crust. Top with beef, tomatoes, jalapenos and cheese.
    Bake at 450° for 10-15 minutes or until cheese is melted. Serve with lettuce, sour cream and salsa if desired. Yield: 6 slices.

Nutritional Facts 1 slice (calculated without optional ingredients) equals 370 calories, 13 g fat (5 g saturated fat), 30 mg cholesterol, 1,103 mg sodium, 46 g carbohydrate, 3 g fiber, 18 g protein.

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Mediterranean Steak Sandwiches

Great supper for a meal in a hurry, especially if you have already marinated or even cooked the steak.

Serves: 4
Prep Time: 10 minutes
Cook Time: 16 to 21 minutes
 
2 teaspoons olive oil, plus more for drizzling
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1 teaspoon dried oregano
1/4 teaspoon pepper
One 1-pound boneless beef top sirloin
4 pita breads, warmed
1/4 cup crumbled feta cheese


Preheat the broiler or light a charcoal or gas grill so that the coals are medium hot to hot.

Whisk together the olive oil, garlic, oregano and pepper and press the mixture evenly into both sides of the steak. (If you prefer, you can do this step up to 8 hours before cooking. Cover and refrigerate the steak, if you do.)

Put the steak on a rack in the broiler pan or on the grilling rack so that the beef is 3 to 4 inches from the heat. Broil or grill for 15 to 18 minutes, depending on how thick it is, for medium-rare to medium. Turn once during cooking.

Carve the steak into thin slices; season with 1/2 teaspoon salt. Arrange equal amount of beef on top of each pita; top with the cheese.

Drizzle the sandwiches with a little more olive oil, if desired.

Note: You can broil or grill the steak ahead of time and make these sandwiches with cold or room temperature meat. Refrigerate the steak, without slicing it, until ready to use.

For an interesting variation top with Tomato Relish:

Combine the following:
1 cup chopped seeded tomato
1 can (2 1/4 oz.) sliced ripe olives, drained
1/3 cup chopped onion
2 tbsp. prepared Italian Dressing

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JOKES:

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote click'."

**************************************************

After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet, which
conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during
the flight that need repair or correction. The mechanics read and correct
the problem, and then respond in writing on the lower half of the form
what remedial action was taken, and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets
before the next flight.
Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of
humor!
Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as
submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance
engineers.
(P = the problem logged by the pilot.)
(S = the solution and action taken by the engineers.)

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

**************************************************

A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking.
Welcome to Flight Number 293, non-stop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax - OH, MY G-D!" Silence followed, and after a few minutes the captain came back on the intercom and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier; but, while I was talking, the flight attendant brought me a cup of coffee and spilled the hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!"
A passenger in Coach said, "That's nothing. He should see the back of mine!"

************************************************

Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!"
"But why, Mom? I don't want to go."
"Give me two reasons why you don't want to go."
"Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!"
"Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready."
"Give me two reasons why I should go to school."
"Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the Principal!"

************************************************

A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."

*******************************************

Four high school boys afflicted with spring fever skipped morning classes. After lunch they reported to the teacher that they had a flat tire.
Much to their relief she smiled and said: "Well, you missed a test today so take seats apart from one another and take out a piece of paper."
Still smiling, she waited for them to sit down. Then she said:
"First Question: Which tire was flat?"

Tags: Religion, Recipes, Tidbits, Jokes,

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REMINDER FROM GOD:

Some Fell on Stony Ground

"A sower went out to sow his seed. And as he sowed, some fell by the wayside; and it was trampled down, and the birds of the air devoured it. Some fell on rock; and as soon as it sprang up, it withered away because it lacked moisture. And some fell among thorns, and the thorns sprang up with it and choked it. But others fell on good ground, sprang up, and yielded a crop a hundredfold." When He had said these things He cried, "He who has ears to hear let him hear!"1

Probably most people like to have a nice lawn around their house. Joy and I certainly do. We used to have a lovely front lawn, but unfortunately ugly weedy-type grass has taken a hold and ruined it. Unfortunately, I didn't get rid of it when it first appeared, so to make it good again, I'll have to destroy the entire lawn and start over from scratch.

It's amazing how easily ugly grasses and weeds grow, but to maintain a good lawn and garden takes constant care. Hopefully this summer I will make the effort to plant a new lawn. To do so, I will first have to destroy our entire lawn, carefully re-cultivate the soil, and get a new layer of top soil before planting new good lawn seed, and then take care of it so it will take root and thrive.

It's exactly the same with the "seed and soil" as illustrated by Jesus in his parable in today's Scripture passage. The seed represents God's message as found in his Word the Bible—a message that includes his message of salvation—and, as Jesus explained, the four soils represent all those who hear God's message and what they do in response to it.

The four soils are best explained in the words of Jesus: "Now the parable is this: The seed is the word of God. Those by the wayside are the ones who hear; then the devil comes and takes away the word out of their hearts, lest they should believe and be saved. But the ones on the rock are those who, when they hear, receive the word with joy; and these have no root, who believe for a while and in time of temptation fall away. Now the ones that fell among thorns are those who, when they have heard, go out and are choked with cares, riches, and pleasures of life, and bring no fruit to maturity. But the ones that fell on the good ground are those who, having heard the word with a noble and good heart, keep it and bear fruit with patience."2

Today's question to you and me is this: "Which soil represents you?" Have you accepted God's message of forgiveness and eternal life and allowed it to grow in "good reproductive soil"?

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, please give me the desire to not only hear your Word, but also the good sense to listen to it with my heart, accept it, and follow its direction knowing that it is for both my temporal and eternal wellbeing. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus name, amen."

1. Luke 8:5-8 (NKJV).
2. Luke 8: 11-15 (NKJV).

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WORD FOR THE DAY:

    never-never land
    audio pronunciation
    nev-er-NEV-er-LAND

    DEFINITION

noun
: an ideal or imaginary place

    EXAMPLES

Lester seems to think he lives in some kind of never-never land where people don't have to accept responsibility for their actions.

"China's pride of ownership is all too familiar to most Taiwanese, who are constantly bombarded by Beijing's assertions that they live in a political never-never land, lacking all the elementary accouterments of statehood." — From an Associated Press article by Annie Huang, February 16, 2012

    DID YOU KNOW?

The phrase "never-never land" is linked to Peter Pan, although it did not originate with that creation of the Scottish playwright Sir James Barrie. In Barrie's original 1904 play, Peter befriends the real-world children of the Darling family and spirits them off for a visit to Never Land, where children can fly and never have to become adults. Then, in his 1908 sequel When Wendy Grew Up, Barrie changed the name to Never Never Land, and subsequent versions of the earlier play incorporated that change. People had been using "never-never land" for a place that was overly idealistic or romantic since at least 1900, but the influence of Peter Pan on the word's popularity and staying-power cannot be discounted.


**********************************************

Why Is It So Hard to Exercise?  Get fit! Here are 5 steps to get you motivated to move.
By Linda Wasmer Andrews

Reviewed By Roy Benaroch, MD

You know you should do it. And you know why: Exercising -- simply put, moving instead of sitting -- is critical for safeguarding your health and setting a good example for your kids. So why does it seem so hard to get yourself moving?

The truth is: You can. But knowing how and why to exercise isn’t enough. You need to develop the right mind-set to get and stay motivated.

"Change is hard!" says certified health behavior coach Shelly Hoefs, fitness supervisor at the Mutch Women’s Center for Health Enrichment in Sioux Falls, S.D. "When we try to start exercising, we think of all the excuses for not doing it and all the things that have gotten in the way before. Getting fit starts to seem overwhelming. And that makes it feel stressful. Before long, we don’t want to do it anymore."

Here are five steps to get you moving in the right direction -- and keep you going.


1. Find Personal Motivation to Exercise

What you need to get you up off the couch is a reason that's important to you. At first, that may be some external factor, says Cal Hanson, director of the Sanford Wellness Center in Sioux Falls, S.D. It could be a number on the scale that surprises you or your doctor's recommendation that you need to move more to stay healthy.

There are all kinds of benefits to getting fit. Which matters most to you? Something as simple as taking a walk after dinner every night helps to:

    control your weight
    strengthen your bones
    enhance your muscles
    reduce your risk for heart disease, type 2 diabetes, and some types of cancer

Plus, by becoming active, you're being a good role model for your children.

These benefits may get you started, but they may not cut it when it comes to keeping you moving day after day, Hanson says. To keep up your motivation to exercise over time, you also need to find your internal motivators. Maybe taking a yoga class leaves you feeling more energized or less stressed. Maybe a run or walk every day helps you let go of stress. Hanson says these are the kind of rewards that are meaningful to you on a personal level and that can help keep you motivated.

2. Set Realistic Goals to Get Fit

CDC guidelines call for adults to do 2 1/2 hours of moderate-intensity aerobic exercise a week. That's a 30-minute walk five days a week. If you kick it up a notch -- jogging or running, for example – it can be 15 minutes a day, five days a week.

You can aim for these exercise guidelines, but don't try to meet them at the start. "People lose their motivation to exercise when they try to do too much too soon," says Hanson.

So instead of walking for 30 minutes a day right off the bat, start out doing 15 minutes a day, two or three days a week.

Set weekly goals, gradually adding more time and intensity. At the end of each week, take a look at how you did. If you reached your goal, celebrate! "And if you didn't reach your goal," Hanson says, "think about what went wrong and how you're going to respond differently next time."

3. Stop Thinking of It as Exercise -- Do Something You Enjoy

You don't have to go to the gym to get a good workout. It's all about moving more -- however you do it. For some people, going to the gym provides structure that helps them focus and a sense of accomplishment when they're done. For others, it's a chore -- one they wind up avoiding as often as they can.

What else can you do? Almost anything that gets you -- and your family -- moving:

    Walk the dog, or walk a neighbor's dog. They'll be grateful for the help!
    Have dance contests with the kids instead of watching TV.
    Go to the park and play hide-and-seek.
    Shoot hoops with the kids.
    Walk or bike to the store instead of driving, or park far away from the entrance.
    Get off the train a stop early and walk the rest of the way to your office.

If you think about it, you're surrounded by opportunities to get more active. Find the ones that you get excited about. You're more likely to keep doing them if you're having fun.

4. Plan How to Fit Exercise Into a Hectic Schedule

For busy parents, a major obstacle to getting fit is lack of time. If you wait for time to open up, chances are you won't be able to squeeze in a walk or a dance class very often. To avoid getting sidetracked by the daily demands of life, try these tips:

    "Sit down with your schedule and really carve out blocks of time," says psychologist Susan Bartell, PsyD, author of Dr. Susan's Fit and Fun Family Action Plan. Put it in your calendar like any other appointment.
    Add physical activity to things you already do. For example, pedal a stationary bike while reading or watching TV. Or take a walk with a friend to catch up instead of calling each other on the phone.
    Plan activities you can do with your kids, such as going for bike rides or skating. Not only will you find more time for fitness, you'll help inspire your kids to move more.

If you plan ahead for potholes on the road to fitness, you're more likely to stay on course, Bartell says. "When you think through solutions to problems in advance, you're less likely to give up when a pothole comes along."
 

5. Bounce Back From Setbacks

You've set a reasonable fitness goal. You've prepared for potential problems. Yet somehow you still didn't make it to the gym today as you had planned. Don't let that be your downfall.

"For many people, this is a slippery slope," Hanson says. "It reminds them of times when they failed before, and they begin to think of themselves as exercise failures."

When this happens, it's time for an attitude adjustment so you don't completely lose your motivation to exercise. If you miss the gym on Monday, that doesn't mean your whole week is shot, Hanson says. It simply means you need to hit the gym on Tuesday or take the dog for an extra-long walk tonight.

Knowing how to exercise isn't just a matter of learning how to use your body to hold a yoga pose or swing a racquet. It also involves learning how to use your mind to propel yourself into action and stick with a fitness routine.

"Start thinking of yourself as someone who exercises," says Hoefs. "Eventually, that will become your identity."

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RECIPE:

Fruit 'N Cream Streusel Coffee Cake

Makes: 9 servings
Prep Time: 20 minutes
Proof Time: 45 minutes
Bake Time: 25 to 30 minutes

Batter:
1 cup whole wheat flour
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
2 envelopes Fleischmann's® RapidRise Yeast
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup butter OR margarine, melted
1/2 cup very warm milk (120° to 130°F)
1 egg
1 teaspoon Spice Islands® Pure Vanilla Extract
Cheese Filling:
4 ounces cream cheese, softened
1/4 cup sugar
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1 egg, beaten
1 teaspoon Spice Islands® Pure Vanilla Extract

Fruit Filling:
1/2 can (20 to 21 ounces) fruit pie filling (about 1 cup)

Streusel Topping:
1/3 cup brown sugar
1/3 cup quick oats
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
3 tablespoons butter OR margarine, softened
1/2 teaspoon Spice Islands® Ground Saigon Cinnamon

Directions
Mix flours, undissolved yeast, sugar and salt in a large mixing bowl. Add butter, milk, egg and vanilla and stir vigorously to thoroughly combine. Pour in a greased 8 x 8-inch square baking pan. Let rest 10 minutes.
Beat cheese filling ingredients in a small bowl until smooth.

Top batter with cheese filling; spoon pie filling over cheese mixture. Combine streusel topping ingredients in small bowl, mixing in butter with a fork until uniform. Sprinkle over top.

Cover coffee cake and let rise in warm draft-free place about 45 minutes, until batter almost reaches the top of the pan.

Bake in a preheated 350°F oven for 25 to 30 minutes, or until done.

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Elephant Ears Recipe

    Prep: 20 min. + rising Cook: 1-1/2 hours
    Yield: 15 Servings

Ingredients

    1 package (1/4 ounce) active dry yeast
    1 cup warm water (110° to 115°)
    1 cup warm milk (110° to 115°)
    3 tablespoons sugar
    1 tablespoon salt
    3 tablespoons shortening
    4 to 4-1/2 cups all-purpose flour
    Oil for deep-fat frying
  
 GLAZE:
    1/2 cup sugar
    1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

Directions

    Dissolve yeast in water. Add milk, sugar, salt, shortening and 2 cups flour; beat until smooth. Stir in enough remaining flour to form a soft dough.
    On a floured surface, knead until smooth and elastic, 6-8 minutes. Place in a greased bowl; turn once to grease top. Cover and let rise in a warm place until doubled, about 1 hour.
    Punch down and shape into 15 ovals, 5-1/2-in. round by 1/8-in. thick. Heat 3-4 in. of oil to 375° in deep-fat fryer. Fry ovals, one at a time, 3 minutes per side or until golden brown. Drain. Mix sugar and cinnamon; sprinkle over warm pastries. Yield: 15 servings.

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 Skillet Fried Corn

"Great side dish with chicken, beef or pork. Easy to prepare."

Prep Time: 10 Min
Cook Time: 30 Min
Ready In:  40 Min
4 servings

Ingredients

    6 ounces bacon, chopped
    3/8 onion, chopped
    3/4 medium green bell peppers, chopped
    3/4 (16 ounce) package frozen corn
    salt and pepper to taste

Directions

    Place bacon in a large, deep skillet. Cook over medium-high heat until evenly brown, but still soft. Stir in onion and green bell peppers, and cook until tender, about 10 minutes.
    Reduce heat to low. Stir corn into skillet, and cook until tender, about 15 minutes. Salt and pepper to taste. Do not drain grease from bacon - that is the secret to the flavor.

Nutritional Information open nutritional information
Amount Per Serving  Calories: 296 | Total Fat: 21.2g | Cholesterol: 31mg

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Banana Bread


Rich buttermilk, crunchy nuts and flavorful, ripe bananas make this banana bread tops.

    PREP TIME 15 Min
    TOTAL TIME 2 Hr 30 Min
    SERVINGS 24


1 1/4    cups sugar
1/2    cup butter or margarine, softened
2    eggs
1 1/2    cups mashed very ripe bananas (3 to 4 medium)
1/2    cup buttermilk
1    teaspoon vanilla
2 1/2    cups Gold Medal® all-purpose flour
1    teaspoon baking soda
1    teaspoon salt
1    cup chopped nuts, if desired


    1 Move oven rack to low position so that tops of pans will be in center of oven. Heat oven to 350°F. Grease bottoms only of 2 loaf pans, 8 1/2x4 1/2x2 1/2 inches, or 1 loaf pan, 9x5x3 inches.
    2 Mix sugar and butter in large bowl. Stir in eggs until well blended. Add bananas, buttermilk and vanilla. Beat until smooth. Stir in flour, baking soda and salt just until moistened. Stir in nuts. Pour into pans.
    3 Bake 8-inch loaves about 1 hour, 9-inch loaf about 1 1/4 hours, or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes. Loosen sides of loaves from pans; remove from pans and place top side up on wire rack. Cool completely, about 2 hours, before slicing. Wrap tightly and store at room temperature up to 4 days, or refrigerate up to 10 days.

Expert Tips

Mini Banana Breads make great gifts! To make, grease bottoms only of 10 miniature loaf pans, 4 1/2x2 3/4x1 1/4 inches. Divide batter among pans (about 1/2 cup each). Bake 30 to 35 minutes.
Stir 1/2 cup chocolate, peanut butter or butterscotch chips into the batter for mouthwatering flavor combinations.
Rise to the occasion! If using self-rising flour, there is no need to add baking soda and salt.
No buttermilk on hand? In an emergency, you can mix 1 1/2 teaspoons lemon juice or white vinegar and enough milk to make 1/2 cup. Or substitute 1/2 cup plain yogurt.

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BAKED FLOUNDER IN LEMON SAUCE     

2 lb. flounder fillets
1 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. pepper
1 tsp. paprika
1/2 c. melted butter
2 tbsp. lemon juice
2 tsp. grated onions

Cut fillets into serving size portions and place in a well greased baking dish. Combine remaining ingredients and pour over fish. Bake at 350 degrees (20-25 minutes). Serves 6.

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BAKED FLOUNDER STUFFED WITH CRABMEAT     

1/4 c. finely chopped green pepper
1/4 c. chopped onion
1/4 c. chopped celery
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/4 c. butter or oil
1 c. fine bread crumbs
2 eggs, slightly beaten
1/2 tsp. pepper
1 tbsp. parsley, chopped
1 (6 1/2 oz.) can crabmeat
8 (8 oz.) flounder fillets
Butter
8 tbsp. lemon juice

Simmer peppers, onions, celery and garlic in butter or oil. Remove from heat and add crumbs, eggs, pepper and parsley. Add crabmeat and toss lightly with fork. Place 2-3 tablespoons of stuffing in middle of each filet. Top with pat of butter and lemon juice. Lap ends of filet across stuffing and pin with toothpick. Place in greased baking dish and bake 25-30 minutes at 325 degrees. Place on serving dish, cover with white wine sauce, sprinkle with paprika and decorate with parsley.


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JOKES:

Two men are standing on a golf course. The first one steps up, tees his first ball, and positions himself for a swing. The man lifts his club, swings smoothly down and smacks the ball into the air. It sails off in a nice, long arc, but as it comes down the two men can see that it's heading straight for the water trap.

Just then, a wind picks up, and a lily pad is blown directly into the ball's path. The ball lands on the lily pad, and after a few seconds a frog hops up onto the pad, grabs the ball in its mouth, jumps off the pad and swims for shore.

When the frog reaches dry land, it spits out the ball, and no sooner has it disappeared into the water than a squirrel comes running up to the ball, grabs it in its paws, and scampers off across the grass. But before it can reach the trees, a hawk swoops down out of nowhere, grabs the squirrel in its talons, and begins to climb back up into the sky. Panicked and struggling to get free, the squirrel releases the ball from its paws, and with the altitude and speed gained from the hawk, the ball sails down in a long, clean fall straight into the hole. Hole in one.

The second man turns to the first, and says "OK, God. Are you going to play golf or are you going to friggin around?"

**************************************************

A traveling salesman is driving down a country road when he comes across a farmer who is standing in his orchard, hoisting pigs into the apple trees with ropes. He stops. "What are you doing?" the salesman asks. "I'm feeding the pigs," answers the farmer, incredulous that someone could ask a question with such an obvious answer. "Well," says the salesman, "why don't you let the apples fall to the ground, gather them up in baskets, and feed the pigs that way?" The farmer ponders, then says, "Hmmmm. Yes, I guess I could do it that way. But what would be the point?" The salesman is a bit exasperated: "Well, it would save time, wouldn't it?" The farmer ponders again. "Yes," he says after a pause, "I guess it would save time. But what's time to a pig?"

**************************************************

The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists...
Two men and a woman.
For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
"We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances.
In side of this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill Her!!!"
The man said, "You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife."
The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job."
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the man came out
with tears in his eyes." I tried, but I can't kill my wife."
The agent said, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."
Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions to kill her husband.
She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls.
After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman.
She wiped the sweat from her brow, and said, "This gun is loaded with blanks. I had to beat him to death with the chair."

************************************************

An old man lived alone in Idaho. He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, Bubba, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament.

Dear Bubba:
I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my potato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me.

Love, Dad

A few days later, he received a letter from his son.

Dear Dad:
For heaven's sake, Dad, don't dig up that garden. That's where I buried the BODIES.
Love, Bubba

At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local Police showed up and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left.
That same day, the old man received another letter from his son.

Dear Dad:
Go ahead and plant the potatoes now. It's the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love, Bubba

************************************************

Merv was in a terrible accident at work. He fell through a floor tile and ripped off both of his ears. Since he was permanently disfigured, he settled with the company for a rather large sum of money and went on his way. One day, Merv decided to invest his money in a small, but growing telecom business called Plexus Communications. After weeks of negotiations, he bought the company outright. But, after signing on the dotted line, he realized that he knew nothing about running such a business and quickly set out to hire someone who could do that for him.
The next day he had set up three interviews. The first guy was great. He knew everything he needed to and was very interesting. At the end of the interview, Merv asked him, "Do you notice anything different about me?" And the gentleman answered, "Why yes, I couldn't help but notice you have no ears." Merv got very angry and threw him out.
The second interview was with a woman, and she was even better than the first guy. He asked her the same question, "Do you notice anything different about me?" and she replied: "Well, you have no ears." Merv again was upset and tossed her out.
The third and last interview was the best of all three. It was with a very young man who was fresh out of college. He was smart. He was handsome. And he seemed to be a better businessman than the first two put together. Merv was anxious, but went ahead and asked the young man the same question: "Do you notice anything different about me?" And to his surprise, the young man answered: "Yes. You wear contact lenses."
Merv was shocked, and said, "What an incredibly observant young man. How in the world did you know that?"
The young man fell off his chair laughing hysterically and replied, "Well, it's pretty hard to wear glasses with no ears!"

*******************************************

An Illinois man left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day.

When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her email address, he did his best to type it in from memory.

Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife, whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her email, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream and fell to the floor in a dead faint. At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

DEAREST WIFE: JUST GOT CHECKED IN. EVERYTHING PREPARED FOR YOUR ARRIVAL TOMORROW.
P.S. SURE IS HOT DOWN HERE.

*******************************************

A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment, they both manage to get to sleep; the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower.
In the middle of the night the woman leans over and says, "I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly pass me another blanket."
The man leans out and with a glint in his eye said "I've got a better idea ... let's pretend we're married."
"Why not," giggles the woman.
"Good," he replies. "Get your own blanket."

Tags: Religion, Recipes, Tidbits, Jokes,

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REMINDER FROM GOD:

Our Daily Devotional:

Before My Eyes

Psalm 101:2-4, NIV: "I will be careful to lead a blameless life -- when will you come to me? I will walk in my house with blameless heart. I will set before my eyes no vile thing. The deeds of faithless men I hate; they will not cling to me. Men of perverse heart shall be far from me; I will have nothing to do with evil."

You open your eyes for the first time in Heaven. What do you see? One old hymn declares, "When we all get to Heaven, what a day of rejoicing that will be. When we all see Jesus, we'll sing and shout the victory." That will be a wonderful day, but there is no reason we can't fully put our eyes on the things of God now. In fact, what we set our eyes on may have greater impact than we think. Some say that what they watch or read is not a problem--that it does not affect them. Yet, perhaps as David, we should consider the need to "set before eyes no vile thing." In this age of multimedia, our senses are barraged with all kinds of images. May God give us the wisdom we need to use discretion--and to be obedient to Him in all things.

 Therefore, behold, I will proceed to do a marvellous work among this people, even a marvellous work and a wonder: for the wisdom of their wise men shall perish, and the understanding of their prudent men shall be hid.
- Isaiah 29:14

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WORD FOR THE DAY:

 antic an-tik , adjective:
1. Ludicrous; funny.
2. Fantastic; odd; grotesque: an antic disposition.

noun:
1. Usually, antics. A. A playful trick or prank; caper. B. A grotesque, fantastic, or ludicrous gesture, act, or posture.
2. Archaic. A. An actor in a grotesque or ridiculous presentation. B. A buffoon; clown.
3. Obsolete. A. A grotesque theatrical presentation; ridiculous interlude. B. A grotesque or fantastic sculptured figure, as a gargoyle.

From the subversive to the antic, the uproarious to the disturbing, the stories of Bruce Sterling are restless, energy-filled journeys through a world running on empty.
-- Bruce Sterling, A Good Old-Fashioned Future

Grey Magic is a work of great scope and stylistic virtuosity, combining antic humor with immense sophistication, an Anglo-American setting with an Anglo-European sensibility and a profound insight into contemporary issues of both personal and collective resonance.
-- Richard Leigh, Grey Magic

Antic comes from the Italian word antico which meant "ancient." Apparently, it was associated with the fantastic figures of the Roman ruins and came to mean "grotesque."

**********************************************

TO ME THIS IS A NEWSWORTHY  PIECE OF INFORMATION THAT I FELT NEEDED TO GET OUT IF NO ONE HAS HEARD IT AND HAS ABILITY TO PASS IT ON  OR HEARS OF ANYONE THAT HAS THE SYMPTOMS AND HAS BEEN SUBJECT TO MOSQUITOES ~ GS ~


West Nile Outbreak on Track to Be Worst Ever - 47 Deaths; Texas Especially Hard Hit

By Daniel J. DeNoonWebMD Health News
Reviewed by Louise Chang, MD


Aug. 22, 2012 -- West Nile virus now has killed 47 people and infected an estimated 95,000 in 38 states in what is almost certain to be the worst West Nile outbreak since the virus hit the U.S. in 1999.

"The number of West Nile disease cases in people has risen dramatically. We are in the midst of one of the largest West Nile outbreaks ever seen," Lyle R. Petersen, MD, MPH, director of the CDC's division of vector-borne diseases, said today in a news teleconference.

It's far from over. Right now, the U.S. is in the middle of mosquito season -- and nearly all West Nile virus infections come from mosquito bites. Case counts usually rise through September.

"The number of cases is trending upward in most areas," Petersen said, noting that 47 states have detected West Nile virus circulating in mosquitoes, birds, or people. Only Alaska, Hawaii, and Vermont have not yet detected the virus.

Half the cases and more than half of the deaths have been in Texas. David L. Lakey, MD, Texas state health commissioner, characterized the situation as a "disaster."

"It is not just about the numbers. This disease impacts the lives of hundreds if not thousands of people, and their lives will be changed by this outbreak. Our hearts go out to them," Lakey said.

Since 2003, when West Nile virus spread across the nation, most West Nile seasons have been relatively mild. Why is this year suddenly so bad?

"We really don't know," Petersen said. "Many major outbreaks in Europe and Africa and now in the U.S. have appeared during abnormally hot weather. Hot weather, in lab tests, does increase transmissibility of the virus from mosquitoes, and that may be one factor."

The CDC also is investigating whether the virus might have mutated into a more dangerous form.

West Nile Symptoms

The good news is that only one in five people infected with West Nile virus gets West Nile fever. Symptoms appear three days to two weeks after the bite of an infected mosquito.

So far this year, there have been 489 reported cases of West Nile fever. Many cases go unreported.

Illness appears suddenly, says Petersen, who was infected in 2003.

"I was out for a jog, and in one mile I went from perfectly normal to the point where I could barely walk," he reports. "That is probably the norm."

And it's not usually a mild or brief illness.

"Those who get more ill with West Nile fever will be laid up in bed for days or a week, followed by a period of just feeling awful. And there can be a fatigue syndrome where people remain fatigued for weeks or months. It lasts longer than we used to think," Petersen said.

And these patients are lucky compared to those who get what the CDC calls "neuroinvasive disease." In about one in 150 people, West Nile virus infects the brain (encephalitis) or the spinal cord and connecting nerves (meningitis). So far this year, there have been 629 reported cases, with 58 cases of paralysis.

"The meningitis or encephalitis can cause paralysis that affects one or more limbs. It can also affect breathing. It is one of the more severe and dreaded complications," Petersen said. "With meningitis, symptoms include headache, stiff neck, eye pain, and fever. Encephalitis, infection of the brain itself, causes cognitive problems, where people can't think properly. It can also cause coma, along with all the symptoms of meningitis as well."

And there's another risk. Last month, Baylor University researchers reported that West Nile virus doesn't go away in some people. The virus hides in the kidneys. Over the course of years, it causes kidney disease that worsens over time.

People with neuroinvasive West Nile disease were most likely to have long-lasting infection and kidney damage. But this also happened to about 9% of those with mild or no symptoms.

Other laboratories have yet to confirm these findings. "But if they are true, they are of importance," Petersen said.

West Nile Virus: Who's at Risk?

Most serious cases of West Nile virus occur in people over age 50. This year, 61% of cases have been over 50, and 39% have been over 60. The elderly are at particularly high risk.

Infants are not at high risk, as very few infant infections have been reported. So far this year, there's been only one reported West Nile infection of an infant.

There have been isolated reports of pregnant women passing the infection to their unborn children, but so far most women known to be infected with West Nile virus have given birth to healthy, uninfected babies.

It's not yet clear whether people with weakened immune systems are at higher risk.

Because West Nile virus is spread by mosquitoes, the CDC notes that people who spend a lot of time outdoors -- especially during dawn and dusk -- are at higher risk.

West Nile virus can be transmitted by blood transfusion. In the U.S., blood is tested for West Nile virus. So far this year, West Nile virus has been detected in 242 samples of donated blood. There have been no known infections via transfusion, and the U.S. blood supply is considered safe.

 
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RECIPE:

Grandma's Peach French Toast

Ingredients

1 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup butter
2 tablespoons water
1 (29 ounce) can sliced peaches, drained
12 (3/4 inch thick) slices day-old French bread
5 eggs
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1 pinch ground cinnamon, or to taste


Directions

In a saucepan, stir together the brown sugar, butter and water. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat to low, and simmer for 10 minutes, stirring frequently.
Pour the brown sugar mixture into a 9x13 inch baking dish, and tilt the dish to cover the entire bottom. Place peaches in a layer over the sugar coating, then top with slices of French bread. In a medium bowl, whisk together the eggs and vanilla. Slowly pour over the bread slices to coat evenly. Sprinkle cinnamon over the top. Cover and refrigerate for 8 hours or overnight.
Remove the dish from the refrigerator about 30 minutes before baking to come to room temperature. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
Bake for 25 to 30 minutes in the preheated oven, or until the bread is golden brown. Spoon out portions to serve.

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Baked Cornmeal Onion Rings

Serves 4 to 6

Ingredients
2 large yellow onions, peeled and cut crosswise into ½-inch-thick slices
2 cups buttermilk
1 teaspoon sea salt
½ teaspoon pepper
1½ cups all-purpose flour
½ cup yellow cornmeal
4 tablespoons canola oil

These crispy rings will warm up any winter evening. They are baked, rather than deep-fried, and are fun for kids to make. Sweet onions are preferred for a tears-free experience, but you can use other varieties as well. Larger onions are easier to work with. Dipping the onions in the batter is a bit messy, so set up your workspace with a tablecloth or other covering that is easy to clean.

Kids Can: Oil the baking sheets; separate the onion slices into rings; measure and mix the ingredients for the batter; dip the onions in batter and coat them with the cornmeal mixture.

Directions
1. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees.
2. Separate the onion slices into rings. In a large bowl, stir together the buttermilk, ½ teaspoon of the salt, and ¼ teaspoon of the pepper. Immerse the onion rings in the buttermilk mixture.
3. In another large bowl, combine the flour, cornmeal, remaining ½ teaspoon salt, and remaining ¼ teaspoon pepper. Pour the cornmeal mixture onto a large platter.
4. Coat 2 baking sheets with the canola oil, using 2 tablespoons for each. Place the sheets in the oven and heat for 5 to 7 minutes. The heated oil will help give the onion rings a crispy texture.
5. With tongs or fingers, remove the onion rings from the buttermilk mixture and put them in the cornmeal mixture. Turn the rings in the cornmeal mixture to coat them evenly. Remove the baking sheets from the oven and arrange the rings on the heated sheets in a single layer. Bake until the undersides of the rings have started to brown, about 10 minutes. Remove the sheets from the oven and turn over the rings. Return to the oven and bake for another 5 minutes or until the bottoms are browned. Serve hot.

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Hush Puppies with Green Zebra Tomato Jam

Yields: About 3 1/2 dozen

Total Time: 1 hr 40 min
Cook Time: 40 min
Oven Temp: 400

Ingredients
   
    1 cup(s) yellow cornmeal
    1 cup(s) all-purpose flour
    3 tablespoon(s) sugar
    1 tablespoon(s) kosher salt
    1 tablespoon(s) baking powder
    1 large egg, lightly beaten
    1 cup(s) milk
    3 tablespoon(s) unsalted butter, melted or 1 tablespoon melted butter plus 2 tablespoons melted bacon fat
    2 pound(s) Green Zebra tomatoes, cut into 1/2-inch dice
    1/2 cup(s) honey
    1/2 cup(s) apple cider vinegar
    1/4 cup(s) sugar
    1 tablespoon(s) finely grated fresh ginger
    1 clove(s) garlic, very finely chopped
    1  (1-inch) cinnamon stick
    1 1/2 teaspoon(s) ground cumin
    1/4 teaspoon(s) cayenne pepper
    Salt
    Vegetable oil, for frying

Directions

    Prepare the hush puppies: In a large bowl, whisk the cornmeal with the flour, sugar, salt, and baking powder. Add the egg, milk, and melted butter. Whisk until smooth. Cover and refrigerate the hush puppy batter for at least 1 hour.
    Meanwhile, make the jam: In a medium saucepan, combine the diced tomatoes with the honey, vinegar, sugar, ginger, garlic, cinnamon stick, cumin, and cayenne. Bring to a boil and simmer over moderately low heat, stirring occasionally, until thick and jammy, about 40 minutes. Discard the cinnamon stick. Season the tomato jam with salt. Transfer the jam to a bowl and let cool.
    Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F. In a large saucepan, heat 2 inches of oil to 350 degrees F. Set a rack over a large rimmed baking sheet and place near the stove. Stir the hush puppy batter. Drop tablespoon-size balls of batter into the hot oil, about 6 at a time, and fry, turning a few times, until they're deeply browned and cooked through, about 3 minutes. With a slotted spoon, transfer the hush puppies to the rack to drain. Repeat with the remaining batter. When all of the hush puppies have been fried, reheat them in the oven for about 3 minutes, or until they're hot. Serve them with the green tomato jam.

Tips & Techniques

Make Ahead: The hush puppy batter can be refrigerated overnight. The tomato jam can be refrigerated for up to 1 month; bring to room temperature before serving.


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Zucchini Boats on the Grill
Delish zucchini stuffed with your favorite ingredients and finished on the hot grill.
Great side dish or as a light meal on their own.

Servings: 4

Ingredients

2 medium zucchini
1 slice white bread, torn into small pieces
1/4 cup bacon bits
1 tablespoon minced black olives
1 jalapeno pepper, minced
3 tablespoons diced green chile peppers
1/4 cup minced onion
1/4 cup chopped tomato
6 tablespoons shredded sharp Cheddar cheese
1 pinch dried basil
seasoned salt to taste
ground black pepper to taste

Directions

1. Prepare the grill for indirect heat.
2. Place the zucchini in a pot with enough water to cover. Bring to a boil, and cook 5 minutes. Drain, cool, and cut
in half lengthwise. Scoop out the pulp to about 1/4 inch from the skin. Chop pulp.
3. In a bowl, mix the zucchini pulp, bread pieces, bacon bits, olives, jalapeno, green chile peppers, onion, tomato,
and Cheddar cheese. Season with basil, seasoned salt, and pepper.
4. Stuff the zucchini halves with the pulp mixture. Seal each stuffed half in aluminum foil.
5. Place foil packets on the prepared grill over indirect heat. Cook 15 to 20 minutes, until tender.

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Sour Cherry Muffins with Crumb Topping

Active Time: 15 Minutes
Total Time: 35 Minutes
Yield: Makes six 3 1/2-inch or twelve 2 1/2-inch muffins
Use the same fruit you'd put into a pie for these muffins: tart red cherries that hold up well in baking, such as Montmorency. Sweeter Bings can be used too, although they soften up much more. Chop the cherries coarsely to get some in every bite.
RECIPE INGREDIENTS
For the Crumb Topping:
1/4 cup packed brown sugar
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons butter or margarine
For the Muffins:
1 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/3 cup granulated sugar
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1 beaten egg
3/4 cup milk
1/4 cup cooking oil
1 cup fresh, frozen, or drained canned pitted tart red cherries, coarsely chopped

DIRECTIONS
FOR THE CRUMB TOPPING:
In a small mixing bowl combine brown sugar and flour. With a pastry blender, cut in butter or margarine till mixture resembles coarse crumbs; set aside.

FOR THE MUFFINS:
Lightly grease six 3 1/2-inch or twelve 2 1/2-inch muffin cups or line with paper baking cups; set aside. In a large mixing bowl stir together flour, granulated sugar, baking powder, salt, and nutmeg. Make a well in the center. In a medium mixing bowl combine egg, milk, and oil. Add all at once to flour mixture; stir just till moistened. (The batter should be lumpy.) Stir in cherries. Spoon into prepared muffin cups, filling each two-thirds full. Sprinkle topping over muffins.

Bake in a preheated 400 degrees F oven till golden brown, about 25 minutes for 3 1/2-inch muffins or 20 minutes for 2 1/2-inch muffins. Remove from pans; cool slightly on racks.

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Pineapple Cream Cheese Bread

Makes: 3 loaves
Prep Time: 45 minutes
Proof Time: 8hrs+45-60 minutes
Bake Time: 15 to 17 minutes

Note: This recipe requires an overnight chill time of 8+hours.

Bread:
2 envelopes Fleischmann's® Active Dry Yeast
1/2 cup warm water (100° to 110°F)
1 cup (8 ounces) sour cream
1/2 cup butter OR margarine
1/2 cup sugar
1 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
4 cups all-purpose flour

Filling:
1 package (8 ounces) cream cheese, softened
1/3 cup sugar
1 egg yolk
1 teaspoon Spice Islands® Pure Vanilla Extract
1 can (8 ounces) crushed pineapple, well drained

Vanilla Glaze: (Optional)
1-1/2 cups sifted powdered sugar
2 tablespoons milk
1 teaspoon Spice Islands® Pure Vanilla Extract

Garnish: (Optional)
1/4 cup slivered almonds

Directions
Dissolve yeast in water in large mixer bowl. Heat sour cream, butter, sugar and salt until warm (100° to 110°F). Note: butter may not melt completely. Add warm mixture, eggs and 2 cups flour to the yeast mixture; stir until well combined. Stir in enough remaining flour to make a soft dough. Cover tightly with plastic wrap; chill overnight.
For filling, beat cream cheese, sugar, egg yolk and vanilla in a medium bowl. Stir in drained pineapple; set aside. Cover three large baking sheets with parchment paper. Divide dough into 3 equal portions. Roll out one dough portion to a 12 x 9-inch rectangle, on a floured surface (keep remaining dough chilled until ready to use).

Spread a scant 2/3 cup cream cheese mixture on rectangle to within 1/2 inch of edges. Roll up, starting with long side. Seal seam. Place, seam side down, on prepared baking sheet. Cut slits on top of roll that are 2 inches apart and half way through the loaf.

Repeat with remaining dough and filling. Cover; let rise in warm, draft-free place until nearly doubled (45 to 60 minutes). Bake in 350º oven for 15 to 18 minutes or until golden. Cool on wire racks.

For optional glaze, combine sifted powdered sugar, milk and vanilla in a medium bowl. Stir in additional milk, 1 teaspoon at a time, until drizzling consistency. While loaves are warm, drizzle with Vanilla Glaze; sprinkle with almonds.


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JOKES:

 Women Drivers

    This morning on the Interstate,    I looked over to my left and there was a
    >>
    >> Woman
    >>
    >> In a brand new
    >> Cadillac
    >>
    >> Doing 65 mph
   
    >> With her   Face up next to her
    >> Rear view mirror
    >>
    >> Putting on her eyeliner.
    >>
    >> I looked away
    >> For a couple seconds...
    >> to continue shaving
    >>
    >> And when I looked back she was
    >> Halfway over in my lane,
    >>
    >> Still working on that makeup.
    >>
    >> As a man,
    >> I don't scare easily.
    >>
    >> But she scared me so much;
    >> I dropped
    >>
    >> My electric shaver
    >>
    >> Which knocked
    >>
    >> The donut
    >> Out of my other hand.
    >>
    >> In all the confusion of trying
    >> To straighten out the car
    >>
    >> Using my knees against
    >> The steering wheel,
    >>
    >> It knocked
    >> My Cell Phone
    >> Away from my ear
    >>
     >> Which fell
    >>
    >> Into the coffee
    >>
    >> Between my legs!
    >>
    >> Splashed,
    >>
    >> And burned
    >>
    >> Big Jim and the Twins,
    >>
    >> Ruined the damn phone,
    >>
    >> Soaked my trousers,
    >>
    >> And disconnected an
    >> Important call.
    >>
    >> Damn women drivers
 
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THINGS TO PONDER:     How is it possible to have a civil war?

"Success is not the key to happiness.
Happiness is the key to success.
If you love what you are doing,
you will be successful."
- Albert Schweitzer


You might be a REDNECK if...
      ...you are still holding on to Confederate money because you think the South will rise again.

Confucious Quote:  The book salesman should be honored because he brings to our attention, as a rule, the very books we need most and neglect most.


**************************************************


Little Johnny came running into the house and asked,
"Mommy, can little girls have babies?"
"No", said his mom, "of course not."
Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his
friends, "It's okay, we can play that game again!"

************************************************

The Yuppette had risen to executive level in the company in no
time at all. Hearing rumors about her, the husband confronted
his wife and accused her of sleeping with all of the top level
managers.

"Now that's entirely false." she cried. "I took the easy route and
slept with anyone who mattered at least twice."

************************************************

A guy was attending a masquerade Halloween Ball, and
dancing with a girl who was wearing a map of Texas for a
costume.

Suddenly she slapped him hard and stalked off the dance floor.
"What the hell happened?" asked a friend who had witnessed
the entire event.

"I'm not really sure." the man replied, rubbing his red cheek.
"When she asked if I had ever been to Texas, I put my finger on
Amarillo to show her, and she let me have it."

*******************************************

At school Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are
hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to
blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth."
Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. He goes home, and as he
is greeted by his mother he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother
quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father."
Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and
greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him
$40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother."
Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees
the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the
whole truth."
The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then
come give your real father a big hug."

*******************************************

A man walks into a doctor's office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear.

"What's the matter with me?" he asks the doctor.

The doctor replies, "You're not eating properly."

Tags: Religion, Recipes, Tidbits, Jokes,

3 comments View Entry

REMINDER FROM GOD:

Our Daily Devotional:

The Line of Faith

Luke 9:1-2, NIV: "When Jesus had called the Twelve together, he gave them power and authority to drive out all demons and to cure diseases, and he sent them out to preach the kingdom of God and to heal the sick."

Where do we draw the line of faith? Does it stop short of that which can only be described as Supernatural? We speak of great commissions to preach and teach and often neglect commandments to heal. If the truth be known, we might realize that it is not our doctrine at all that prevents us from moving into works of faith, but it is the lack of faith to see God move beyond the ordinary--and a lack of appreciation when He moves within the ordinary. Nothing about God is ordinary. He has a great many things to accomplish through each of us. What He asks you to do may go beyond your limitations--but it will never exceed His abilities.
Surely the Lord GOD will do nothing, but he revealeth his secret unto his servants the prophets.
- Amos 3:7

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WORD FOR THE DAY:

 pelagic puh-LAJ-ik , adjective:
1. Of or pertaining to the open seas or oceans.
2. Living or growing at or near the surface of the ocean, far from land, as certain organisms.

I was reminded of certain kinds of pelagic birds that move at ease in the air or on the ocean, but have a hard time walking.
-- Ross MacDonald, The Blue Hammer

However, the real slaughter, the one that all the maritime nations of the world opposed and strove to abolish, was pelagic sealing, the kind that Schransky particularly enjoyed and from which he profited enormously.
-- James Michener, Alaska

Pelagic is derived from the Greek word pélag which meant "the sea."
 
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 Insect Bites and Stings: Tips and Remedies

Tick Bites

    Ticks are the leading carriers of diseases to humans in the U.S., and second only to mosquitoes worldwide. Similarly to mosquitoes, toxins in the tick's saliva cause the disease.
    Hard ticks have a tough back plate and tend to feed for hours to days. With hard ticks, disease transmission usually occurs near the end of a meal.
    Soft ticks have a more rounded body and lack the back plate. They usually feed for less than an hour and disease transmission can occur in less than a minute.
    Lyme disease is caused by hard ticks including deer ticks. Sitting on a log in the woods, leaning up against a tree or gathering wood are risky activities when trying to avoid ticks.
    Tick bites are generally painless and may go completely unnoticed. You may notice a red, circular bump and some itching and burning once the tick is removed.
    To remove a tick, use tweezers to flip the tick over on its back
    Grasp the tick firmly with the tweezers as close to the skin as possible. Try to grasp the tick close to its head; avoid squeezing the tick's abdomen.
    Pull gently until the tick comes free. Do not twist and turn the tick, as the head or mouth parts may break off and stay in the skin, increasing the chances for infection.
    Do not use petroleum jelly or a match to remove the tick.
    Crushing the tick may transmit diseases. Rinse it down a sink or flush it down a toilet.
    Clean the bite area with soap and water or a mild disinfectant and observe the area for several days.
    Illnesses transmitted by the tick often begin only days or weeks after the tick is gone. If symptoms occur, tell the physician if you have been outdoors. Symptoms may include fever, numbness, rash, confusion, weakness, pain and swelling in the joints, shortness of breath, nausea, and/or vomiting. Blood tests are needed to diagnose any illness.
    To avoid ticks, stay away from outdoor areas where ticks thrive during the months of April through September.
    Tuck pants into boots or socks. Wear light colored clothes so ticks can be easily spotted and brushed off. Apply insect repellent. Promptly check yourself, others, and pets if exposed to tick areas.

Bee Stings

    If you have a history of severe reactions to insect stings, call emergency medical services.
    If the stinger is still present, remove it immediately. Gently scrape the skin with a credit card, your thumbnail, or a blunt knife.
    Don't pinch the stringer with your fingers or tweezers because this could squeeze more venom into the skin.
    Apply ice or cold packs to constrict the capillaries and reduce swelling.
    Clean the area with soap and water and apply a hydrocortisone cream or a mixture of baking soda and water.
    If no other treatment is available, just scoop up a handful of mud and hold it on the sting until the mud dries or apply a slice of onion to the spot and hold it for a minute or so.

Mosquito Bites

    Male mosquitoes feed only on nectar, whereas female mosquitoes nourish their developing eggs with protein rich blood.
    Mosquitoes prefer to bite ankles and wrists, where blood vessels are nearer to the skin's surface.
    Mosquitoes spit an anticoagulant under our skin, leaving us with whatever disease they're carrying (encephalitis, malaria, West Nile virus, yellow fever).
    Lemon Eucalyptus oil can be used to repel mosquitoes.
    Cool the area of the bite to constrict the capillaries near the skin's surface and reduce swelling. Try a cool compress.
    Remember not to scratch the bite; this will only make it worse.
    To eliminate the itch, rub on meat tenderizer or lemon juice.
    White vinegar is another remedy for relieving the itch of insect bites. Apply it in full strength. Don't use vinegar if the area is raw.

*********************************************
RECIPE:

Mediterranean Steak Sandwiches

Great supper for a meal in a hurry, especially if you have already marinated or even cooked the steak.

Serves: 4
Prep Time: 10 minutes
Cook Time: 16 to 21 minutes
 
2 teaspoons olive oil, plus more for drizzling
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1 teaspoon dried oregano
1/4 teaspoon pepper
One 1-pound boneless beef top sirloin
4 pita breads, warmed
1/4 cup crumbled feta cheese


Preheat the broiler or light a charcoal or gas grill so that the coals are medium hot to hot.

Whisk together the olive oil, garlic, oregano and pepper and press the mixture evenly into both sides of the steak. (If you prefer, you can do this step up to 8 hours before cooking. Cover and refrigerate the steak, if you do.)

Put the steak on a rack in the broiler pan or on the grilling rack so that the beef is 3 to 4 inches from the heat. Broil or grill for 15 to 18 minutes, depending on how thick it is, for medium-rare to medium. Turn once during cooking.

Carve the steak into thin slices; season with 1/2 teaspoon salt. Arrange equal amount of beef on top of each pita; top with the cheese.

Drizzle the sandwiches with a little more olive oil, if desired.

Note: You can broil or grill the steak ahead of time and make these sandwiches with cold or room temperature meat. Refrigerate the steak, without slicing it, until ready to use.

For an interesting variation top with Tomato Relish:

Combine the following:
1 cup chopped seeded tomato
1 can (2 1/4 oz.) sliced ripe olives, drained
1/3 cup chopped onion
2 tbsp. prepared Italian Dressing

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Chocolate and Buttercream Swiss Roll

3 large eggs
 Â¼ cup unsweetened cocoa powder, plus extra for dusting
6 tbsp granulated sugar
 5 tbsp butter, at room temperature
½ cup all-purpose flour
1 cup confectioners' (powdered) sugar, sifted, plus extra for dusting (optional)

1  Preheat the oven to 400 F (200 C). Place a large bowl over a pan of hot water, add the eggs and sugar, and beat with an electric mixer for 5-10 minutes, until the mixture is thick and creamy. Sift in the flour and cocoa powder and fold in with a spoon.
2  Line an 8 x 12in (20 x 30cm) jellyroll pan with parchment paper, then pour the mixture into the pan and level the top. Bake for 10 minutes, until the cake is springy to the touch. Remove from the oven, cover with a damp tea towel, and leave to cool.
3  Turn the cake out onto a sheet of parchment paper dusted with cocoa powder. Put the butter in a mixing bowl and beat with an electric mixer until creamy. Whisk in the confectioners' sugar a little at a time, then spread the mixture over the cake. Using the parchment paper to help you, roll the cake into a long cylinder, starting from one of the short sides. Dust with more cocoa powder, if desired, and serve.

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Creamy Crockpot Potatoes

2 pounds small red potatoes,quartered
2 8 ounce packages cream cheese,softened
1 can cream of potato soup,undiluted
1 envelope buttermilk ranch salad dressing mix

Place potatoes in bottom of crockpot.
Beat cream cheese,soup and salad dressing mix.
Stir into potatoes.
Cover and cook on low for 8 hours

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Fried Cornbread (Southern Style)

 Prep Time:
Cook Time: 20 mins 5 mins 15 mins


A SOUTHERN bread for sure! Goes well with any boiled leafy greens, cabbage, lima beans, black-eyed peas, fried fish or pork chops.
 Servings: 5-6 Units:

 1 cup self-rising cornmeal mix
2/3 cup water
1 cup vegetable oil (for frying)

Directions:

1 Mix first two ingredients to make a batter --- add more or less water depending on how thick or thin you want your cornbread patties. The best way would be to mix in small amounts of water at a time to get the consistency you want.

 2 In a skillet or frying pan bring oil up to medium heat and test 1/2 teaspoon drop of batter, You do not want it to fry too fast. I normally cook mine on #6 and then furn down to #5 on my stove. Drop by tablespoons full and pat out with back of spoon to make a pattie. Turn over when bottom is light brown.

3 Serve and enjoy this tasty bread!

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Triple-Chocolate Cheesecake

An American-born beauty, the cheesecake gets upgraded with a triple dose of chocolate. It's in the crust, in the filling, and over the top in the form of our rich Chocolate Ganache. To help prevent cracks, turn off the oven and let the cheesecake sit inside for an hour. To cut the cleanest slices, use a knife dipped in warm water.


Yields: 1 (9-inch) cheesecake

Total Time: 2 hr 30 min
Prep Time: 30 min
Oven Temp: 325

Ingredients
   
Cheesecake:

    1 package(s) (9-ounce) chocolate wafer cookies
    6 tablespoon(s) unsalted butter, melted
    4 bar(s) (8 ounces each) cream cheese, room temperature
    1 1/2 cup(s) sugar
    1/2 teaspoon(s) salt
    4 large eggs
    1 cup(s) sour cream
    8 ounce(s) semisweet chocolate, melted
    Chocolate Ganache, for topping

Directions

    Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Assemble a 9-inch springform pan with the raised side of the bottom facing down.
    In a food processor, pulse cookies until finely ground. Add butter, and pulse to moisten. Transfer to prepared pan, and press crumbs firmly and evenly into the bottom. Place pan on a rimmed baking sheet; bake 10 minutes, and set aside.
    Wipe out bowl and blade of food processor. Add cream cheese, sugar, and salt; blend until smooth. With motor running, add eggs, then sour cream, and finally chocolate; blend filling until smooth, scraping down sides of bowl as needed.
    Pour filling onto crust, and bake just until set, 1 hour. Turn oven off, and let cheesecake sit 1 hour in oven, without opening (this helps prevent cracking).
    Run a thin knife around the edge of the pan (this helps prevent cracking, too); leave in pan, and cool completely on wire rack. Cover loosely and refrigerate, at least 6 hours or up to overnight.
    Prepare Chocolate Ganache: In a small saucepan, bring cream to a boil. Remove from heat, and add chocolate. Stir until melted, then set aside until thickened, 2 to 5 minutes.
    Unmold cheesecake. Spread ganache in center of cheesecake; let set before serving.

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Crispy Johnny Cakes

1 cup cornmeal
1/2 cup flour
1 Tablespoon sugar
1 teaspoonn salt
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 egg, beaten
1 cup milk

Mix and cook on a griddle as you would pancakes. Serve with maple syrup.

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JOKES:

Two cab drivers met.
"Hey," asked one, "what's the idea of painting one side of your cab red
and the other side blue?"
"Well," the other responded, "when I get into an accident, you should see
how all the witnesses contradict each other."

**********************************************

Lunching with English friends at the time of her husbands reverement,
Madame de Gaulle was asked what she was looking forward to in the
years ahead.
"A penis." she replied without hesitation. The embarrassed silence that
followed was broken by the former President.
"My dear, I don't think that the English pronounce the word like that,
it is 'appiness'"

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A young Jewish man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love
and going to get married. He says,  "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going
to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I'm
going to marry."
The mother agrees. The next day, he brings three beautiful women
into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for
a while.
He then says,"Okay, Ma. Guess which one I'm going to marry."
She immediately replies, "The red-head in the middle."
"That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?"
"I don't like her."

**********************************************

Twelve men were arrested near Szczecin in northern Poland as they were
digging up a road because they had heard a rumor that it was built with a
large stockpile of police-confiscated hashish. The hashish had been sold
to a chemical plant to be incinerated into ash for road construction.

**********************************************

Paul Carthy, 25, pleaded guilty in Exeter, England, in September to theft
subsequent to his original charge of shoplifting from a liquor store. In
the second theft, he had stolen the magnetic letters off the name board
that was held up to his face when his mug shot was taken.

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How to Make a Vase out of a Plastic Bottle

Make a Vase out of a Plastic Bottle

While this creation looks like a delicate glass or crystal vase, it is unbreakable and can still be recycled later if desired!

Steps

    1    Mark and cut the smooth middle portion of the bottle to give an even edge approx 7.
    Mark and cut the smooth middle portion of the bottle to give an even edge approx 7.
    Mark and cut the smooth middle portion of the bottle to give an even edge approx 7.5 to     8cm (3") above where you want the fluted rim to be.

   2    Measure and make straight, evenly spaced cuts all the way around the bottle.
    Measure and make straight, evenly spaced cuts all the way around the bottle.
    Measure and make straight, evenly spaced cuts all the way around the bottle. Cut the     segments in half and then cut each of those in half to make even, thin strips.

    3    Carefully press and fold all the strips outward to make a level edge all the way     around.
    Carefully press and fold all the strips outward to make a level edge all the way around.
    Carefully press and fold all the strips outward to make a level edge all the way around.

    4    Press the bottle upside down on a flat surface to ensure an even edge.
    Press the bottle upside down on a flat surface to ensure an even edge.
    Press the bottle upside down on a flat surface to ensure an even edge.
 
  5    Weave the tip of a strip over the next one and under the next two.
    Weave the tip of a strip over the next one and under the next two.
    Weave the tip of a strip over the next one and under the next two. Fold and crease it so     that the tip is at the place shown here by the arrow.

    6    Fold and crease the next one the same way, but weave this one over two and under     one.
    Fold and crease the next one the same way, but weave this one over two and under one.
    Fold and crease the next one the same way, but weave this one over two and under one.
 
  7    Fold the third strip and weave the same as the first one.
    Fold the third strip and weave the same as the first one.
    Fold the third strip and weave the same as the first one.
  
 8    Continue around in this pattern until the last three and tuck each one under the next until      woven in completely.
    Continue around in this pattern until the last three and tuck each one under the next until     woven in completely.
    Continue around in this pattern until the last three and tuck each one under the next until     woven in completely.


Tips

    Be sure to maintain the regularity of the creases.
    Because the plastic will be very lightweight, add marbles, beach glass, or decorative     stones in the vase to provide a weighted base.
    When you add the marbles and stones and allow the light to shine through your vase, it     will produce beautiful, stained glass-like colors.
    keep the masurement same

Things You'll Need

    Cylindrical plastic bottle, preferably one with a fluted shape at the base.
    An example: The size of this 500ml bottle
    The outside diameter 21cm, The length of strip 4.5cm
    Craft, gardening, or kitchen scissors.
    Beach glass, marbles, or decorative stones.

Tags: Religion, Recipes, Tidbits, Jokes,

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REMINDER FROM GOD:

Feeling Lost or Far From God

"From one man he made every nation of men … God did this so that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each one of us. 'For in him we live and move and have our being.'"1

A Daily Encounter reader writes, "I am feeling lost before God and fear that I will never get to heaven and am on my way to hell. Please can you help me?"

Dear Janet (name changed), feeling lost in relationship to God and feeling far from him is something many people experience, so you are not alone in your struggle. This can be caused by various things such as the following:

First, it can be because we are depending on our feelings rather than trusting in what God's Word says. So be sure to read the article, "How to Be Sure You're a Real Christian at http://tinyurl.com/8glq9. If you prayed the prayer to receive Jesus as your Savior and truly meant it, God has forgiven all your sins and has guaranteed that you have the gift of eternal life in Heaven with God forever. You need to believe God's Word and what he says regardless of your feelings. We are saved by faith in God and not by our feelings.

Second, feeling lost or far from God can be caused by guilt … that is, if we are acting in ways that we know are sinful and wrong. This causes a barrier to come between us and God. If this is the case, you need to confess your sins to God, ask for his forgiveness, and change your ways.

Third, another major reason for feeling lost and/or feeling far from God is because of impaired relationships which can go back all the way from yesterday to early childhood. If you have any unresolved issues with any significant person in your life, ask God to help you to resolve this if at all possible. If this isn't possible, you need to resolve any repressed negative feelings in you (such as hurt and/or anger) regarding this relationship so you can freely forgive the person (or persons) whom you feel have hurt you. These supercharged negative feelings not only build a barrier between ourselves and loved ones, but also between ourselves and God. For further help be sure to read the article, "Forgiveness: The Power to Heal" at http://tinyurl.com/dvwh5. You may also need the help of a well trained counselor to help you resolve repressed negative emotions.

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, thank you that you are close to me regardless of how I feel. Please reveal to me the cause (or causes) of my feelings when I am feeling lost or when it seems that you are far away. With your help I choose to trust in you no matter what, and please help my feelings to catch up with my choice. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."

1. Acts 17:26-28 (NIV).

**********************************************

WORD FOR THE DAY:

     aught
    audio pronunciation
    AWT

    DEFINITION

pronoun
1
: anything
2
: all, everything

    EXAMPLES

"Xury said it was a lion, and it might be so for aught I know." - From Daniel Defoe's 1719 novel Robinson Crusoe

"He dropped, dead, into the shallow water, but I was too late for aught but revenge." - From Judson Roberts' 2011 novel Viking Warrior

    DID YOU KNOW?

"If you know aught which does behove my knowledge / Thereof to be inform'd, imprison't not / In ignorant concealment," Polixenes begs Camillo in Shakespeare's The Winter's Tale, employing the "anything" sense of "aught." Shakespeare didn't coin the pronoun "aught," which has been a part of the English language since before the 12th century, but he did put it to frequent use. Writers today may be less likely to use "aught" than were their literary predecessors, but the pronoun does continue to turn up occasionally. "Aught" can also be a noun meaning "zero," and the phrase "the aughts" has been bandied about as a proposed label for the decade that began in the year 2000.

**********************************************

Are You Chasing Happiness Or Is Happiness Chasing You?
 

Ever since Happiness heard your name It has been running through the streets trying to find you. ~ Hafiz of Persia

So many of us were raised to believe that HAPPINESS is something we find somewhere outside ourselves and it’s something we find by doing more and having more, but is that really the case?

We are human beings not human doings and we discover HAPPINESS not by chasing after all kind of material things, not that there is something wrong with having them, BUT by being still, by enjoying who we are, where we are and by enjoying what we already have right NOW in this moment. If you aren’t happy  and content with your life right now, chances are that you won’t be happy and content when you will get all the things you are now chasing after. It’s how we humans are wired,  constantly looking for more, for something else, for something better and in this search of ours we forget to be present, we forget to enjoy life, we forget to be HAPPY, we forget to LIVE!

Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections. ~ Unknown

If we keep on pretending that HAPPINESS is somewhere out there and if we keep on living our lives on auto pilot, HAPPINESS will be something we will rarely or never come into contact with, because you see, just like John Lennon said it, Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.

And in the closing I would like to share with you this really beautiful story I found a few years ago. Not sure who the author is but if you do feel free to share it with us all.

There was an old wise cat and a small kitten in an alleyway. The old cat saw the kitten chasing its tail and asked:

“Why are you chasing your tail?”

To it the kitten replied:

“I’ve been attending cat philosophy school and I have learned that the most important thing for a cat is happiness, and that happiness is my tail. Therefore, I am chasing it: and when I catch it, I shall have happiness forever.”

Laughing, the wise old cat replied:

“My son, I wasn’t lucky enough to go to school, but as I’ve gone through life, I too have realised that the most important thing for a cat is happiness, and indeed that it is located in my tail.  The differece I’ve found though is that whenever I chase after it, it keeps running away from me, but when I go about my business and live my life, it just seems to follow after me wherever I go.”


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RECIPE:

Marinated Asian Pork Tenderloin

This quick-to-prepare entree bursts with flavor. Throw together the marinade before work, so it’s ready to cook at night. —April Lane, Greeneville, Tennessee

This recipe is:
Healthy
Quick
Diabetic Friendly

    Prep: 10 min. + marinating Bake: 20 min.
    Yield: 6 Servings


Ingredients

    1/3 cup packed brown sugar
    1/3 cup reduced-sodium soy sauce
    2 tablespoons lemon juice
    2 tablespoons sesame oil
    2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce
    4 garlic cloves, minced
    1 tablespoon ground mustard
    1 teaspoon pepper
    2 pork tenderloins (3/4 pound each)

Directions

    In a small bowl, combine the first eight ingredients. Pour 1/2 cup marinade into a large resealable plastic bag. Add the pork; seal bag and turn to coat. Refrigerate for 8 hours or overnight. Cover and refrigerate remaining marinade.
    Drain and discard marinade. Place pork on a rack in a shallow roasting pan. Bake at 450° for 20-25 minutes or until a meat thermometer reads 160°, basting occasionally with reserved marinade. Let stand for 5 minutes before slicing. Yield: 6 servings.

Nutritional Facts 3 ounces cooked pork equals 218 calories, 8 g fat (2 g saturated fat), 63 mg cholesterol, 510 mg sodium, 12 g carbohydrate, trace fiber, 24 g protein. Diabetic Exchanges: 3 lean

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Simple Lemon Ice Cream

Just five ingredients (and no ice cream maker!) are all you need to make this refreshing ice cream. We enjoy generous scoops of it in summer. —Janet Eisner, Portland, Oregon

This recipe is:
Quick

    Prep: 15 min. + freezing
    Yield: 8 Servings

Ingredients

    1 cup milk
    1 cup sugar
    1/3 cup lemon juice
    1 cup heavy whipping cream
    1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

Directions

    In a small saucepan, heat milk to 175°; stir in sugar until dissolved. Cool completely. Stir in lemon juice.
    In a large bowl, beat cream until stiff; fold in vanilla and cooled milk mixture. Pour into a 9-in. square dish. Freeze for 4 hours or until firm, stirring at least once. Remove from the freezer 10 minutes before serving. Yield: 1 quart.

Nutritional Facts 1 serving (1/2 cup) equals 221 calories, 12 g fat (7 g saturated fat), 45 mg cholesterol, 27 mg sodium, 28 g carbohydrate, trace fiber, 2 g protein.

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Refreshing Orange Ice

This sherbet has been part of my family's Thanksgiving tradition for three generations. We eat it along with the rest of the meal...the tangy, creamy flavor complements the turkey and all the trimmings.—Carol Lydon, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

This recipe is:
Quick

    Prep: 10 min. + chilling
    Yield: 10-12 Servings


Ingredients

    3 cups water, divided
    1 cup sugar
    1 can (12 ounces) frozen orange juice concentrate, thawed
    2 tablespoons lemon juice
    1/2 cup half-and-half cream

Directions

    In a saucepan, bring 1 cup water and sugar to a boil, stirring frequently. Boil for 1 minute or until sugar is dissolved. Remove from the heat; stir in orange juice concentrate, lemon juice and remaining water. Transfer to a freezer-proof bowl. Cover and freeze until firm.
    Remove from the freezer. Beat until blended. Beat in cream. Cover and return to freezer. Remove from the freezer 20 minutes before serving. Yield: 10-12 servings.

Nutritional Facts 1/2 cup equals 124 calories, 1 g fat (1 g saturated fat), 5 mg cholesterol, 6 mg sodium, 28 g carbohydrate, trace fiber, 1 g protein.

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No-Bake Scotcheroos

Need sticky, chewy and chocolatey all in one bite? These no-bake bar cookies have it all! Makes 30 bars.

Serves: makes about 30 bars
Prep Time: 5 minutes
Cook Time: 5 minutes
 
Non-stick cooking spray
1 1/2 cups creamy peanut butter
1 cup granulated sugar
1 cup light corn syrup
6 cups toasted rice cereal
1 2/3 cups (11-oz. pkg.) NESTLÉ TOLL HOUSE Butterscotch Flavored Morsels
1 cup (6 oz.) NESTLÉ ® TOLL HOUSE ® Semi-Sweet Chocolate Morsels


COAT 13 x 9-inch baking pan with cooking spray.
COMBINE peanut butter, sugar and corn syrup in large saucepan. Cook over medium-low heat, stirring frequently, until melted. Remove from heat. Add cereal; stir until thoroughly coated. Press onto bottom of prepared baking pan.

MICROWAVE butterscotch morsels and semi-sweet chocolate morsels in large, uncovered, microwave-safe bowl on HIGH (100%) power for 1 minute; stir. Morsels may retain some of their original shape. If necessary microwave at additional 10- to 20-second intervals, stirring until smooth. Spread over cereal mixture.

REFRIGERATE for 15 to 20 minutes or until topping is firm. Cut into bars.

LITTLE KITCHEN HELPER HINTS
Older children can melt the chocolate and butterscotch in the microwave with adult supervision. Show them how the chocolate holds its shape until it`s stirred and explain that it easily burns. That`s why you`re cooking in short bursts. Make sure the kids use mitts to touch the bowl.


Kids can measure in the cereal and spread the melted butterscotch topping.

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Mexican Rice

A 'side of Mexico' sure to enhance any Mexican meal.


Serves: 8
Prep Time: 5 minutes
Cook Time: 35 minutes

     
2 tablespoons butter or margarine
1 cup long grain white rice
1/2 cup onion, chopped
2 cloves garlic, finely chopped
1 16-oz. Jar ORTEGA® Thick & Chunky Salsa, medium
1 1/4 cups water
1 large carrot, peeled and shredded
1/2 cup frozen peas, thawed (optional)


DIRECTIONS:

MELT butter in large saucepan over medium heat. Add rice, onion and garlic; cook, stirring occasionally, for 3 to 4 minutes or until rice is golden. Stir in salsa, water, carrot and peas. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low; cook, covered, for 25 to 30 minutes or until liquid is absorbed and rice is tender.

Notes: For a quick-cook Mexican Rice, use 4 cups instant rice instead of 1 cup long-grain white rice, and 2 1/2 cups water instead of 1 1/4 cups water. After salsa mixture comes to a boil, cook for length of time recommended on instant rice package.

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Teriyaki Pineapple & Pork Chops

Pork chops are wonderful on the grill. Adding the pineapple and teriyaki makes it even better! It reminds me of Hawaii!—Alaina Showalter, Clover, South Carolina

This recipe is:
Quick

    Prep: 15 min. + marinating Grill: 10 min.
    Yield: 4 Servings


Ingredients

    1 cup unsweetened pineapple juice
    4 bone-in pork loin chops (8 ounces each)
    1 tablespoon minced fresh rosemary or 1 teaspoon dried rosemary, crushed
    1 teaspoon garlic powder
    1/2 teaspoon salt
    1/4 teaspoon pepper
    1 fresh pineapple
    1/2 cup teriyaki sauce
    1 package (9 ounces) fresh baby spinach

Directions

    Place pineapple juice in a large resealable plastic bag; add pork chops. Seal bag and turn to coat; refrigerate for up to 2 hours.
    Drain and discard marinade. Combine the rosemary, garlic powder, salt and pepper; sprinkle over chops.
    Peel and core pineapple; cut into eight spears. Grill chops and pineapple, covered, over medium heat for 4-5 minutes on each side or until a thermometer reads 145° and pineapple is tender, basting occasionally with teriyaki sauce. Let meat stand for 5 minutes before serving.
    Arrange spinach on a serving platter; serve with pineapple and chops. Yield: 4 servings.

Nutritional Facts 1 pork chop with 1-1/2 cups spinach and 2 pineapple spears equals 433 calories, 19 g fat (7 g saturated fat), 111 mg cholesterol, 1,644 mg sodium, 24 g carbohydrate, 3 g fiber, 41 g protein.


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JOKES:

THE CORN STORY:
 
There was a farmer who grew superior quality and award-winning CORN. Each year he entered his CORN in the state fair where it won honour and prizes.
 
Once a newspaper reporter interviewed him and learnt something interesting about how he grew it. The reporter discovered that the farmer shared his seed corn with his neighbours.
 
"How can you afford to share your best seed corn with your neighbours when they are entering corn in competition with yours each year?" the reporter asked.
 
"Why sir, "said the farmer, "didn't you know? The wind picks up pollen from the ripening corn and swirls it from field to field. If my neighbours grow inferior, sub-standard and poor quality corn, cross-pollination will steadily degrade the quality of my corn. If I am to grow good corn, I must help my neighbours grow good corn."
 
The farmer gave a superb insight into the connectedness of life. His corn cannot improve unless his neighbour's corn also improves. So it is in the other dimensions! Those who choose to be at harmony must help their neighbours and colleagues to be at peace. Those who choose to live well must help others to live well.

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Modern Technology
 
I was visiting my son and daughter-in-law last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper.
 
'This is the 21st century, old man,' he said.
'We don't waste money on newspapers. Here, you can borrow my iPad.'
 
I can tell you, that bloody fly never knew what hit it...

**********************************************

 John Wilson
What's the Problem?
 
 
The wife left a note on the fridge.........
 
"It's not working!! I can't take it anymore; I've gone to stay at my mothers!"
 
I opened the fridge, the light came on and the beer was still cold.........
 
What the hell is she talking about?!!

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Garfield on the oil crisis


A lot of folks can't understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in Canada .

Well, there's a very simple answer,
Nobody bothered to check the oil.

We just didn't know we were getting low.

The reason for this is purely geographical.

Our Oil is located in:

ALBERTA
SASKATCHEWAN
BRITISH COLUMBIA
MANITOBA
COASTAL NEW BRUNSWICK
COASTAL NEWFOUNDLAND

Our DIPSTICKS are located in OTTAWA 

Any Questions ???
NO ?... Didn't think so.

**********************************************

THING TO PONDER:  How does the snow plow driver get to work?


"When life's problems seem overwhelming, look around and see
what other people are coping with. You may consider yourself fortunate."
- Ann Landers

You might be a REDNECK if...
     ...the beer can collection in the town museum is the big tourist attraction.


**********************************************

Scientists Decode the First Message From an Alien Civilization...

Simply send 6 x 10 to the 50 atoms of Hydrogen to the
Star System at the top of the list, cross off that star
system, then put your Star System at the bottom of the
list and send it to 100 other Star Systems.  Within
one-tenth of a Galactic Rotation you will receive
enough hydrogen to power your civilization until
entropy reaches its maximum!  IT REALLY WORKS!

Tags: Religion, Recipes, Tidbits, Jokes,

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REMINDER FROM GOD:

A God Thing

"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."1

According to Jim Green, Executive Director of The JESUS Film Project, "A Jesus film team was driving to a film showing site in a Muslim nation, a remote region that has hardly been touched by the Good News. It was a restricted area, with many hazards for those who would dare to openly share their faith. As the team drove along, they prayed that God would go before them and open doors of opportunity and give them safety.

"Just before they arrived at the village, a policeman flagged down their car. It seemed that an Islamic teacher needed a ride. The officer made the introductions and asked if they could help. Feeling it was an acceptable and necessary risk, they agreed and offered a ride, and continued towards town.

"You can imagine the anxiety the team must have felt when this highly respected teacher asked, 'Tell me, are you the ones planning to tell people about God?'

"Entrusting themselves to the Lord, they responded, 'Yes, we are.' Apprehension turned to astonishment as they listened to what this teacher said next. Bouncing along the dusty road, the teacher told the team how he had experienced a unique dream.

"'I was told to come to this spot in the road, at this time, and that I would encounter someone who would tell me about God. It must be you.'

"They gave him some literature that JESUS film teams carry in the local language, and invited him to come the showing of JESUS that night. He not only came but also helped distribute literature to the people!"2

It is my personal conviction that if an individual sincerely seeks God and his truth, God will reveal himself to him/her in whatever way or through whomever he chooses.

Suggested prayer: "Dear God, thank you that whenever I or anyone sincerely seeks you with all their heart, they will find you. Gratefully, in Jesus' name, amen."


1. Jeremiah 29:13 (NIV).

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WORD FOR THE DAY:

     weald
    audio pronunciation
    WEELD

    DEFINITION

noun
1
: a heavily wooded area : forest
2
: a wild or uncultivated usually upland region

    EXAMPLES

"Challenger's house was on the very edge of the hill, and from its southern face, in which was the study window, one looked across the vast stretch of the weald to where the gentle curves of the South Downs formed an undulating horizon." — From Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's 1913 novella The Poison Belt

"Graham is a watercolour artist painting mainly landscapes around his home in the Weald of Kent." — From an announcement in the Kentish Express, June 28, 2012

    DID YOU KNOW?

If "weald" were a tree, it would have many annual rings. It has been in use as a general word for "forest" since the days of Old English, and it has also long been used, in its capitalized form, as a geographic name for a once-heavily forested region of southeast England. "Weald" is also often capitalized today when used to refer to wooded areas like the Weald of Kent and the Weald of Sussex in England. In time, the word branched out to designate any wild and uncultivated upland regions. A related word is "wold," meaning "an upland plain or stretch of rolling land."

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15 Life Changing Lessons to Learn from Wayne Dyer
 
Some of the most powerful and life changing lessons I have learned so far came from this great man, Wayne Dyer and today I would like to share with you some of these lessons. The lessons are in no particular order as all of them are equally important.

1.COOPERATION IS HEALTHIER THAN COMPETITION
Work on improving your own person and be so busy with doing so that you don’t have time to compare and compete with others. We are all in this together and this sense of separation will only weaken us all creating more pain and suffering.
If you’re always in a hurry, always trying to get ahead of the other guy, or someone else’s performance is what motivates you, then that person is in control of you. ~ Wayne Dyer

2. IF YOU LOVE PEOPLE YOU DON’T TRY TO CHANGE THEM
When you love somebody you love them for what they are not for what you want them to be, without imposing your will and without constantly trying to change them.
Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you. ~ Wayne Dyer

3. IGNORANCE IS NOT BLISS
Allow yourself to expand your mind a little more day by day, give up labels and you will be happier. If you constantly say NO to “strange” ideas, things, events, people, how can you expect to progress through life? Try new things, if it makes your life better stick to it and if it doesn’t let it go, It’s that simple.
The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about. ~ Wayne Dyer

4. YOU ARE NOT A VICTIM OF THE WORLD
When you affirm thing like, You make me mad, this situation is upsetting me, I can’t believe you are treating me this way, etc., you start playing the victim game. Take responsibility for your own thoughts, your own feelings and actions and by doing so you will no longer give your power away to forces outside yourself. When something negative wil come your way you will pause and instead of reacting you will RESPOND, to everything and everyone. You will no longer be a victim but rather a person who is aware of his/her inner strength and power.
How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours. ~ Wayne Dyer

5. YOU FIND YOURSELF IN SOLITUDE
If you deeply and profoundly love and accept yourself, you will enjoy the time you spend alone as much as you do when you are surrounded by the people you love dearly.
You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with. ~ Wayne Dyer

6. REJECTION MAKES YOU STRONGER
If you listen to your own heart and intuition you will always know where to go and what to do and no matter how many doors will be closed in your face you will not give up. Allow rejection to make you stronger not bitter.
Be grateful to all those people who told you no. It’s because of them that you managed to do it all yourself. ~Wayne Dyer

7. SELF WORTH CANNOT BE VERIFIED BY OTHERS
If you constantly seek outside yourself for approval and validation you will never be happy. We are all different and we all perceive things in different ways and your reputation is not something you can really control, your reputation is not really in your hands, so stop trying to please everyone around you and start pleasing your own SELF. You are the person who matters the most and if you yourself are not happy with who you are, nobody will be happy with YOU!
Self-worth cannot be verified by others. You are worthy because you say it is so. If you depend on others for your value it is other-worth. ~ Wayne Dyer

8. YOU DON’T ATTRACT WHAT YOU WANT IN YOUR LIFE, YOU ATTRACT WHAT YOU ARE
People often think if they focus long enough on something they want, with the Law of Attraction and everything they will get whatever they want in life, but that’s not how things work. If you purify your mind and your hearth, you will attract many beautiful things in life and abundance will not be something you will have to chase for it will start to chase you. But if your mind and heart is full of negativity, expect negativity in all forms to constantly show in your life.
”If you’re obsessed with defeating the other guy and winning at all costs, then you’re guranteed to attract the vibrational equivalent of this thinking into your life- even if you do yoga and stand on your head chanting mantras everyday.” Wayne Dyer

9. THERE ARE NO LIMITS TO WHAT YOU CAN ACHIEVE – YOU ARE A NO LIMIT PERSON
There are no limits to what you can achieve, only those you choose to impose on yourself.
When you argue for your limitations, all you get are your limitations. ~ Wayne Dyer

10. HEAVEN ON EARTH’ IS A CHOICE YOU MUST MAKE, NOT A PLACE YOU MUST FIND
Loving people live in a loving world. Hostile people live in a hostile world. Same world. ~ Wayne Dyer
Focus on the BAD and that’s all you will see and attract into your life; focus on the GOOD and that’s all you will see and attract into your life.
 It is a truly scientific phenomenon that when you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. ~ Wayne Dyer

11. NO NEED TO STRESS OVER EVERYTHING
Believe it or not, there is an invisible force who created the whole world, the whole Universe and this force becomes available to us the moment we stop trying to do it all by ourselves, the moment we decide to allow events to take their natural course and just go with the FLOW.
Good morning, this is God. I will be handling all of your problems today. I will not need your help. So have a miraculous day. ~ Wayne Dyer

12. ALL THAT YOU NEED IS ALREADY WITHIN YOU
In this moment you have it all, right NOW and right here, there is nothing lacking. Take time to be quiet at least 5 minutes per day and in time you will discover that you do have access to HAPPINESS, PEACE, ABUNDANCE and all that is good at all times.
You have everything you need for complete peace and total happiness right now. ~ Wayne Dyer

13. THERE IS NO END TO PERSONAL GROWTH
Growth doesn’t end when you finish school. The moment you’ve stopped growing you can say that you’ve stopped living.
Individuals who use self-labels are stating, “I’m a finished product in this area, and I’m never going to be any different.” If you’re a finished product all tied up and put away, you’ve stopped growing. ~ Wayne Dyer

14. BE REALISTIC – EXPECT MIRACLES
There is a great power in the Universe and this power is available to you the moment you align with who you really are deep down inside, and from that moment on miracles become part of your every day life.
Once you believe in yourself and see your soul as divine and precious, you’ll automatically be converted to a being who can create miracles. ~ Wayne Dyer

15. FOLLOW YOUR HEART AND YOU WILL BE SUCCESSFUL
This is such a powerful truth that only a few of us get to live and discover it. When you get your life on purpose, when you focus on giving the best of you to the world, abundance will flow freely into your life and you will discover happiness you never thought could be yours.

Doing what you love is the cornerstone of having abundance in your life. ~ Wayne Dyer


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RECIPE:


Espresso Caramel Squares with White & Dark Chocolate Swirl

2 cups all-purpose flour 1 tablespoon instant espresso or coffee granules
1/2 cup sugar 3 tablespoons light corn syrup
Pinch of table salt 1 1/2 cups high-quality bittersweet chocolate chips
2 1/2 sticks cold unsalted butter, cut into pieces 3 tablespoons white chocolate chips
1 (14-ounce) can sweetened condensed milk

1Prepare a 9 × 13-inch baking pan by greasing it with cooking spray and then lining the bottom with parchment paper.
2To make the crust, combine the flour, sugar (1/4 cup), and salt in the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment. With the machine running on low speed, gradually add the pieces of butter (12 tablespoons). Raise the speed to medium-low and mix for 3 minutes, until of the butter has been incorporated.
3Turn the dough out into the prepared pan, and evenly press it over the bottom. Prick the dough all over with the tines of a fork. Refrigerate the dough for 20 minutes.
4Preheat the oven to 350°F.
5Bake, rotating the pan halfway through, for 11 minutes, until it is golden around the edges. Let cool.
6To make the caramel, combine the sweetened condensed milk, sugar (1/4 cup), coffee granules, butter (8 tablespoons), and corn syrup in a medium heavy-bottomed saucepan set over low heat. Stir constantly until butter begins to melt. Increase temperature to medium-low, and continue to stir until the mixture begins to boil. Cook for 8 to 10 minutes, until the caramel is thick enough that when you drag the spoon through the middle, the indentation remains for 2 seconds. Be very careful at this point because the caramel is very hot.
7Pour the caramel over the crust and spread it out in an even layer, working quickly, as the caramel will firm up as it cools. Let the caramel cool completely.
8Loosen the edges of the crust with a metal spatula. Invert the pan over a large baking sheet, releasing the bars onto the baking sheet. Remove the parchment, and invert the bars again onto a cutting board.
9To make the chocolate layer, put the bittersweet chocolate in a micro- wave safe bowl. Heat it on high power in 1-minute intervals, stirring between heatings to prevent the chocolate from burning, until it has melted. Spread the chocolate evenly over the caramel.
10In a second microwave-safe bowl, melt the white chocolate in the same way. Using a pastry bag (or a plastic sandwich bag with a small hole cut into one corner), pipe stripes of white chocolate over the dark chocolate.
11Let the chocolate layer cool for 20 minutes. When the chocolate is almost set but not quite hard, use a small, thin paring knife to cut 2-inch squares. The caramel can be messy, so be sure to clean the knife after each cut.

After cutting these into squares, you'll be left with the not-so-attractive edges. We cut them into bits, freeze them, and then toss them on top of ice cream.

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A Good Easy Garlic Chicken
Sprinkle chicken breasts with garlic powder, onion powder and seasoning salt - then sautee and enjoy.
Couldn't be easier! Great recipe for quick and easy meal, even for the pickiest eater!

Servings: 4

Ingredients

3 tablespoons butter
4 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves
2 teaspoons garlic powder
1 teaspoon seasoning salt
1 teaspoon onion powder

Directions

1. Melt butter in a large skillet over medium high heat. Add chicken and sprinkle with garlic powder, seasoning salt and onion powder. Saute about 10 to 15 minutes on each side, or until chicken is cooked through and juices run clear.

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Melt In Your Mouth Blueberry Cake

Ingredients

1/2 cup butter
1/2 cup white sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 egg yolks
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/3 cup milk
2 egg whites
1/4 cup white sugar
1 1/2 cups fresh blueberries
1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon white sugar
Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease and flour an 8 inch square pan.
Cream butter or margarine and 1/2 cup sugar until fluffy. Add salt and vanilla. Separate eggs and reserve the whites. Add egg yolks to the sugar mixture; beat until creamy.
Combine 1 1/2 cups flour and baking powder; add alternately with milk to egg yolk mixture. Coat berries with 1 tablespoon flour and add to batter.
In a separate bowl, beat whites until soft peaks form. Add 1/4 cup of sugar, 1 tablespoon at a time, and beat until stiff peaks form. Fold egg whites into batter. Pour into prepared pan. Sprinkle top with remaining 1 tablespoon sugar.
Bake for 50 minutes, or until cake tests done.

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Bacon Ranch Potato Salad

ingredients

2 pounds red potatoes, cut into bite-size pieces
1 (16 ounce) container sour cream
1 (1 ounce) package ranch dressing mix
1 1/4 cups cooked bacon, crumbled
1 1/2 cups shredded Cheddar cheese
2 bunches green onions, thinly sliced
Directions

Place the potatoes into a large pot and cover with salted water. Bring to a boil over high heat, then reduce heat to medium-low, cover, and simmer until tender, about 20 minutes. Drain, then run under cold water until cool.
Combine the sour cream and ranch dressing mix in a small bowl until well-blended. Transfer the potatoes, bacon, Cheddar cheese, and green onions to a large bowl. Stir in the sour cream mixture until well-coated. Cover and refrigerate for about 2 hours before serving.

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Watermelon Fire and Ice Salsa

Ingredients

3 cups chopped watermelon
1/2 cup chopped green bell pepper
2 tablespoons lime juice
2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro
1 tablespoon chopped green onions
1 tablespoon chopped jalapeno pepper
1/2 teaspoon garlic salt
Directions

In a large bowl, combine the watermelon, green bell pepper, lime juice, cilantro, green onions, jalapeno and garlic salt. Mix well and serve.

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 Guacamole

The only guac recipe you'll ever need. Four ingredients, 10 minutes and the party’s most popular dip is done. Don’t forget the lime—its zing makes the difference.

time
prep:  10 min
total:  10 min
servings
total:
10 servings, 2 Tbsp. dip and 16 pieces each

    What You Need
    2     fully ripe avocados
    1/2    cup  MIRACLE WHIP Dressing
    2    Tbsp.  lime juice
    1    clove  garlic, minced
     WHEAT THINS Original Snacks
   

Make It

    MASH avocados with fork in small bowl.
    ADD all remaining ingredients except WHEAT THINS; mix well.
    SERVE with WHEAT THINS.
 

  Kraft Kitchens Tips
   
Serving Suggestion
    Serve with tortilla chips or cut-up vegetable dippers in addition to/instead of the crackers.
 
  Special Extra
    Top with chopped fresh tomatoes before serving.

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JOKES:

You might be a REDNECK if...
    ...that billboard that says, "SAY NO TO CRACK" reminds you to pull up your jeans.

"You must take personal responsibility.  You cannot change the circumstances,
the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself"
- Jim Rohn

THINGS TO PONDER:  What does the Q in Q-tip stand for?

CONFUCIUS QUOTE:   If we don't know life, how can we know death?


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I'VE LEARNED.........Temptation always promises more than it produces.

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SU WONG MARRIES LEE WONG.
The next year, the Wongs have a new baby.
The nurse brings over a lovely, healthy, bouncy,
But definitely a Caucasian, WHITE baby boy.

'Congratulations,' says the nurse to the new parents.
Well Mr. Wong, what will you and Mrs. Wong name the baby?'
The puzzled father looks at his new baby boy and says,
'Well, two Wong's don't make a white, so I think we will name him...
Are you ready for this?
Picture:  winking baby
Sum Ting Wong

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(PROOF-READING IS A DYING ART, WOULDN'T YOU SAY?)            
Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
Some shooter here!

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I just couldn't help but sending this along. Too funny.  
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
      No, really? Ya think?
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Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
       Now that's taking things a bit far!
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Miners Refuse to Work after Death
 No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's!

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ARCHAEOLOGICAL DISCOVERY
After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, New York scientists found
traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the conclusion, that
their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago.

Not to be outdone by the New Yorkers, in the weeks that followed, a
California archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly after, a
story in the LA Times read: 'California archaeologists, finding traces of a
200 year old copper wire, have concluded that their ancestors already had an
advanced high-tech communications network a hundred years earlier than the
New Yorkers.’
One week later, The Pioneer Press, a local newspaper in Minnesota, reported
the following: "After digging as deep as 30 feet in his pasture near
Embarrass, Minnesota, Ole Olson, a self-taught archaeologist reported that
he found absolutely nothing. Ole has therefore concluded that 300 years ago,
Minnesota had already gone wireless."

Atta boy Ole! You go guy! Way to show 'em dat we're not so backward as dey
tink! Who said Minnesotans are hicks? UFFDA!!!

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THOUGHT FOR THE DAY………..  To love your child for his perfection is nothing.
To love him for his failures is to love him well.  It is that love which
will form the later man- the man whom failure cannot defeat.  Louis Binstock

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You might be a REDNECK if... 
    ...you think fast food is hitting a possum at 65 mph. 

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He said - Since I first laid eyes on  you, I've wanted to make love
to you really badly.

She said - Well, you  succeeded.

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What do you call an  intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?

A rumor

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A stranger was  seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the the
stranger turned to  the Little Johnny and said, "Let's talk. I've heard
that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your
fellow passenger."
Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said
to the stranger "What would you like to  discuss?"
"Oh, I don't know," said the stranger. "How about nuclear power?"
"OK," said Little Johnny. "That could be an interesting topic.  But let
me ask you a question first.  "A horse, a cow, and a deer all  eat
grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow
turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why
do you suppose that is?"
"Jeez," said the stranger. "I have no idea."
"Well, then," said Little Johnny, "How is it that you feel qualified to
discuss nuclear power when you don't know sh*t?"

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Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to the
other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go
home after we've been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I
get to the driveway. I shut off the engine and coast into the garage. I
take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the stairs, I
get undressed in the bathroom. I ease into bed and my wife STILL wakes
up and yells at me for staying out so late!"

His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you're obviously taking the
wrong approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up
the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, rub my hands
on my wife's butt and say, 'Hey honey, wanna fool around?' ....and she's
always sound asleep."

Tags: Religion, Recipes, Tidbits, Jokes,

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