"So many fly to Me when difficulties are insurmountable, never realizing that if they sought Me every day for companionship and guidance many of the difficulties would not exist." -- GOD
Leviticus 23:9-14
(9) And the LORD spoke to Moses, saying, (10) "Speak to the children of Israel, and say to them: "When you come into the land which I give to you, and reap its harvest, then you shall bring a sheaf of the firstfruits of your harvest to the priest. (11) He shall wave the sheaf before the LORD, to be accepted on your behalf; on the day after the Sabbath the priest shall wave it. (12) And you shall offer on that day, when you wave the sheaf, a male lamb of the first year, without blemish, as a burnt offering to the LORD. (13) Its grain offering shall be two-tenths of an ephah of fine flour mixed with oil, an offering made by fire to the LORD, for a sweet aroma; and its drink offering shall be of wine, one-fourth of a hin. (14) You shall eat neither bread nor parched grain nor fresh grain until the same day that you have brought an offering to your God; it shall be a statute forever throughout your generations in all your dwellings.
The wavesheaf offering is an easily overlooked offering. Only those aware of the counting required to observe Pentecost notice it because the count for Pentecost begins with the day of the wave-sheaf offering. Possibly many of us were once unaware of the wavesheaf offering because the church supplied us with a calendar showing the holy day dates for many years in advance. Since the date of Pentecost had already been determined for us, we were unaware that the count began with the day the ancient Israelites made the obscure wavesheaf offering.
Occurring on only one day each year, the day of the wavesheaf offering is not designated a holy day by God. But it is far from minor or obscure in its meaning to salvation. In fact, we could say that, without what it means to our salvation, there would be no salvation!
The wavesheaf consisted of an omer of barley, still on the stalk, cut at the beginning of the spring harvest. Since it came from the very beginning of the harvest of the firstfruits, it can be called the first of the firstfruits (Exodus 23:19). A comparison of Exodus 23:14-19; 34:22-26; Leviticus 23:10-11 and Nehemiah 12:44 confirms that each Israelite possessing a harvest was required to give an offering. A priest then lifted or "waved" each sheaf before God for acceptance. However, while the individual Israelite farmers did bring a firstfruits offering to the priests, the standard, recorded practice during the Second Temple period (the time of Christ) was to perform only one official waving of a sheaf by a priest in Jerusalem. This one sheaf and its waving represented all the others brought by individual farmers.
In its setting in the Old Testament, the wavesheaf offering represents a thankful acknowledgment to God as the Giver of the harvest, while dedicating or consecrating it to Him. Its waving set the stage for the rest of the harvest to proceed. In fact, the work of harvesting could not begin until the wavesheaf offering occurred.
Though Scripture specifies the day the wavesheaf was to be cut, it gives no specific time of day to cut it. Jewish history from the Second Temple period gives an interesting insight. The second-century Mishnah affirms that, when the Sadducees controlled the Temple, the sickle was put to the grain just as the sun was going down on the weekly Sabbath (Menahot 10:1-4, Jacob Neusner translation, pp. 753-754). The book, Biblical Calendars, states, "The Boethusians [Temple priests] reaped [the firstfruits sheaf] at the going out of the Sabbath" (p. 218. Additional information can be found in the section titled "Temple Service," p. 280, as well as in The Temple: Its Ministry and Services by Alfred Edersheim, 1994, pp. 203-205). The New Testament's silence on this Sadducean practice—along with its agreement with the ritual's fulfillment in Christ—must be construed as acceptance of its validity.
The priests began to make the first cutting right at the end of the Sabbath, continuing over into the first day of the week, when the bulk of the work would be done. The ritual, however, was not complete until the sheaf was offered (waved) before God the following morning, or more precisely, between 9:00 a.m. and noon. Some might object to the reaping of the sheaf in the closing minutes of the Sabbath because it is a day of rest when no work is to be done. After one understands the full reason for it, as well as Jesus' direct statement that a priest is blameless in the performance of his required duties (Matthew 12:5), any objections to the practice disappear.
The spiritual reason is supplied in the New Testament, when a major step in God's plan begins to unfold. The Old Testament situates the festivals of God within the agricultural harvests, but in the New Testament, these agricultural harvests become types of God's spiritual harvests of souls into His Kingdom. The New Testament uses this imagery extensively (e.g. John 4:35-36; Matthew 9:36-38).
Another clear reference to a spiritual harvest is the Parable of the Wheat and Tares:
The kingdom of heaven is like a man who sowed good seed in his field; but while men slept, his enemy came and sowed tares among the wheat. . . . [The owner said,] "Let both grow together until the harvest, and at the time of the harvest I will say to the reapers, 'First gather together the tares and bind them in bundles to burn them, but gather the wheat into my barn.'" (Matthew 13:24-25, 30)
In His explanation of this parable, Jesus says, "The enemy who sowed them is the devil, the harvest is the end of the age, and the reapers are the angels. . . . Then the righteous will shine forth as the sun in the kingdom of their Father. He who has ears to hear, let him hear!" (Matthew 13:39, 43). It is so plain! A harvest symbolizes a resurrection. More specifically and positively, a harvest is a type of a resurrection to eternal life—birth into the Kingdom of God!
The resurrected Jesus Christ fits into this picture as the archetypical Wavesheaf. He was crucified "in the middle of the week" (Daniel 9:27), a Wednesday, and put into the grave near sunset (John 19:31, 38-42). Mark confirms this: "Now when evening had come, because it was the Preparation Day, that is, the day before the Sabbath [an annual Sabbath, the first day of Unleavened Bread]" (Mark 15:42). The holy day fell on a Thursday, followed by a second preparation day, then the weekly Sabbath (Luke 23:54-56).
Jesus explains in Matthew 12:39-40 that the length of time He would be in the tomb is the sign of His Messiahship. Counting three days and three nights from Jesus' burial in the tomb on Wednesday evening near sunset brings us to Saturday evening near sunset. As the Sabbath was ending, the Father burst the bonds of Christ's death by the power of His Holy Spirit and resurrected Him as very God.
He was now prepared to be accepted before the Father. But John 20:1 and John 20:17 show that His ascension did not occur until sometime Sunday morning.
The Bible nowhere indicates that the priests understood the ritual they were performing on Saturday evening when Jesus Christ, the archetypical Wavesheaf, was "harvested" from the material world by being resurrected from the dead. On Sunday morning, as the firstborn of many brethren, He was lifted into and through the heavens to God's throne to be accepted by Him as the sacrifice for our sins and as our High Priest.
God's plan had just taken a momentous step toward its completion. The Redeemer of mankind had triumphed and been glorified. "For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life" (Romans 5:10). Now the payment for our sins had been secured and a sinless and dynamic High Priest installed as our Mediator before the Father. Our salvation had now been assured and death conquered, preparing the way for many, many more to follow.
On the surface, the wavesheaf offering may seem an insignificant event lost in the more visible activities of Passover and Unleavened Bread. Though it may be lost on this world's "Christianity," it memorializes the most significant spiritual event that has yet taken place on earth: the resurrection and ascension of our Savior Jesus Christ! Thank God that He has given us understanding of it! We can be even more thankful when we understand that it signifies the real beginning of the spiritual work of harvesting human souls, culminating with us being resurrected and changed to spirit as Jesus' brothers and sisters at His return!
Luke 19:10
“For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost.â€
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WORD FOR THE DAY:
axiomatic • ak-see-uh-MAT-ik • adjective
1 : taken for granted : self-evident 2 : based on or involving an axiom or system of axioms
Examples:
The axiomatic concept of supply and demand dictates that if there is a decrease in the amount of a commodity available and an increase in the public need for it, then the price of that commodity will go up.
"It has long been unspoken but axiomatic among those who live in the stratospheric world of the membership rolls of Augusta National Golf Club: people desperate to join never will, regardless of how hard they may try." -- From an article by Larry Dorman in the New York Times, April 9, 2011
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You might be a REDNECK if...
...your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.
"If we all did the things we are capable of doing, we would literally
astound ourselves."
- Thomas Edison
THINGS TO PONDER: Why are movie theatres always so cold?
"Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."
- Abraham Lincoln
THINGS TO PONDER: Why do phone companies give you a number to call if your phone doesn't work?
CONFUCIOUS QUOTE: The firm, the enduring, the simple, and the modest are near to virtue.
You might be a REDNECK if...
...you bring your dog to work with you.
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How to Make a Card Come Back to the Top of the Deck
How do you put a card on the top put it in the middle and make it come back to the top? Here is how to perform this simple but very effective magic trick.
Steps
1 Tell the participant you are going to use mind control to make a card magically rise to the top of a deck.
2. Perform a double lift. As you’re talking, perform a double lift — that is, pretend you are taking just the top card from the top of the deck, but actually pick up the first two cards. Do this without showing that you have two cards.
The critical part here is to remove the two cards so smoothly that the participant believes you are showing them only the top card.
3 Turn the cards over and ask the participant to memorize the card you are showing them — which they think is the top card. In actual fact, it will be the second card that they're seeing but they will think it's the first card.
4 Put the cards back. When they have assured you they have the card memorized, put the cards back on the top of the deck, and make a big show of removing the top card putting it into the middle of the deck. Now the once second card is on top.
Obviously, don’t let the person see the face of the card!
5 Say the magic words, snap or ask the participant to tap on the deck and visualize the card rising toward them.
6 Now flip over the top card, and enjoy their amazement that the card you supposedly shoved in the middle is suddenly back on top
Warnings
Make sure you practice before you do it in public or you will probably not succeed.
Things You'll Need
A deck of cards.
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Slow-Cooker Chicken Cacciatore
Busy day ahead? Why not put this dish together in the morning, and let it slow cook all day and you'll have a flavor-packed, family-favorite dinner that's ready when you are.
Serves: 6
Prep. time: 20 minutes
Cooking time: 7 to 8 hours
1 1/2 cups Swanson Chicken Stock
4 cloves garlic, minced
2 tsp. Italian seasoning, crushed
2 cans (14.5 oz.each) diced tomatoes with Italian herbs, drained
1 lb. mushrooms, cut in half (about 5 cups)
2 large onions, chopped (about 2 cups)
3 lbs. chicken parts, skin removed
1/4 cup cornstarch
1 pkg. (16 oz.) spaghetti, cooked and drained
Stir 1 cup stock, garlic, Italian seasoning, tomatoes, mushrooms and onions in a 6-quart slow cooker. Add the chicken and turn to coat.
Cover and cook on LOW for 7 to 8 hours or until the chicken is cooked through. Remove the chicken from the cooker and keep warm.
Stir the cornstarch and remaining stock in a small bowl until the mixture is smooth. Stir the cornstarch mixture in the cooker. Cover and cook on HIGH for 10 minutes or until the mixture boils and thickens. Serve with the chicken and spaghetti.
RECIPE TIPS
Time-Saving: This recipe may also be cooked on HIGH for 4 to 5 hours.
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Captain Billy's Breakfast
"This sausage-egg strata was first served to us by a Navy friend (presently a captain and still on active duty) at a Sunday brunch during an Army-Navy football weekend (Navy won). We have modified the recipe somewhat, substituting potatoes for bread and using low-fat sausage, and have been serving it at the Graycote since we took over in 1992." Graycote inn, Bar Harbor, Maine
Yield: Serves 6 to 8
5 to 6 medium-sized potatoes, peeled, boiled, and chopped
1 cup flavored croutons
1/4 cup dried chopped onion
2 cups grated hard cheese (or combination of cheddar, Monterey Jack, and provolone)
1 pound low-fat turkey sausage, fully cooked, either sliced or crumbled (any kind of sausage will do)
10 eggs, beaten
2 cups half-and-half or milk
Salt
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 cup crushed cornflakes cereal
Layer the potato, croutons, onion, half of the cheese, sausage, and remaining cheese in a 13x9-inch baking dish coated with no-stick cooking spray. Beat the eggs, half-and-half or milk, salt, and cayenne together and pour over the layered ingredients. Cover and refrigerate overnight. Remove the dish from the refrigerator 15 minutes before baking. Sprinkle cornflakes over the top and bake in a preheated 350 degree oven for 45 minutes or until set (may have to cover with aluminum foil last 15 to 20 minutes). Let stand 5 minutes before slicing.
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Individual Party Quiches
Yield: Makes 24-30.
Pastry for 2-crust pie
4 eggs
1 cup sour cream
1/2 cup milk
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon white pepper
3/4 cup grated Swiss cheese
Scallops, shrimp, carrots, leeks, and/or mushrooms, cooked and sliced
Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. Prepare pastry dough, roll out into 1 large rectangle, and cut to fit greased individual tartlet molds or small muffin tins, approximately 2 inches across. Line each mold with pastry and set on a baking sheet. Beat together eggs, sour cream, and milk; add salt and pepper. Stir in 1/2 cup cheese. Spoon mixture into molds, filling each one 3/4 full. Add 1 slice of seafood or vegetable to each mold, as desired. Sprinkle remaining 1/4 cup cheese over each and bake for 30 minutes. Cool slightly and serve. (These can be baked ahead, cooled, and refrigerated; to reheat, bake at 350 degrees F for 10 to 15 minutes.)
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Apple and Cranberry Puffed Pancake
Yield: Serves 2 to 4.
3 eggs, room temperature
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup milk
2 to 4 tablespoons butter
2 medium-size Granny Smith apples, sliced (or 1 Red Rome and 1 Granny Smith)
1/2 cup chopped fresh cranberries
1-1/4 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1 tablespoon granulated sugar
lemon juice (optional)
confectioners' sugar
In a medium-size bowl, thoroughly whisk the eggs. Slowly add the flour, whisking all the while to prevent lumps. Gradually add the milk and whisk to form a smooth batter. Set aside.
In a medium-size skillet, melt 2 tablespoons butter, then add the apples, cranberries, cinnamon, and granulated sugar. Cook over medium heat until the apples are fork tender, about 15 minutes.
In a 9-inch pie plate, melt the remaining 2 tablespoons butter, being careful not to bum it (or spray with a nonstick cooking spray). Fill the plate with the apple mixture and top with the batter. Bake in a preheated 450°F oven for 15 to 20 minutes or until puffed and golden.
Top the pancake with a sprinkling of lemon juice, if desired, and finish off with a liberal dusting of confectioners' sugar. Slice into portions and serve immediately.
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Cheese Strata
This old-fashioned layered dish was once popular for Christmas breakfast. Make it the night before to feed a crowd for holiday brunch. It's something even the little ones will love.
Yield: 12 to 14 servings
1 tablespoon softened butter
18 slices white bread (preferably left out for several hours), crusts removed
2-1/2 cups ricotta cheese
4 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese
2 cups diced ham
2 tablespoon fresh rosemary, finely chopped
3-1/2 cups milk
6 large eggs
8 ounces cheddar cheese, grated
Use the softened butter to generously grease a 9x13-inch glass or stainless-steel baking dish. Fit 6 slices of bread into the dish. (Don't worry if there are spaces; as the bread soaks, it will swell to fit.) In a large bowl combine the ricotta, Parmesan, ham, and rosemary. Spread half the ricotta mixture on top of the bread layer and smooth it with a spoon. Add a second layer of bread and cover this with the remaining ricotta mixture. Add a final layer of bread. In a bowl combine the milk and eggs, whisk until smooth, and pour on top of the strata. Cover with aluminum foil or plastic wrap, and refrigerate overnight.
Remove the chilled strata from the refrigerator at least 1/2 hour before baking and set out at room temperature. Heat the oven to 350 degrees F. Remove the wrapping from the strata and sprinkle on the grated cheddar cheese. Place the baking dish inside a larger roasting pan or dish, and carefully pour in warm water halfway up the sides of the strata pan. Bake until puffy and brown and a knife inserted in the center comes out clean, about 1 hour. Cool for 20 minutes, cut into squares, and serve.
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FOX HUNTING
I felt a real need to share this to you and ask you to do the same....
Please don't misread my intentions.... I am in NO way in agreement with any type of gun control, but after seeing this.... I am, unfortunately, in agreement that something needs to change...
If you agree with this, please send to the powers that be.. Hope we can stop it.
While I agree that hunting is an ethical God-given right, I think that we would have to agree on this...
Fox hunting in MONTANA should be banned!
Please help ban fox hunting in Montana
THIS MADNESS MUST STOP!!
Signed,
Peter Cottontail
Bugs Bunny
The Easter Bunny
Thumper
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GENIE
A Husband takes his wife to play her first game of golf. Of course, the wife promptly hacked her first shot right through the window of the biggest house adjacent to the course.
The husband cringed, 'I warned you to be careful! Now we'll have to go up there, find the owner, apologize and see how much your lousy drive is going to cost us.'
So the couple walked up to the house and knocked on the door. A warm voice said, 'Come on in.'
When they opened the door they saw the damage that was done: glass was all over the place, and a broken antique bottle was lying on its side near the pieces of window glass.
An old man in silk pajamas reclining on the couch asked, 'Are you the people that broke my window?'
'Uh...yeah! , sir. We're sure sorry about that,' the husband replied.
'Oh, no apology is necessary. Actually I want to thank you.. You see, I'm a genie, and I've been trapped in that bottle for a thousand years.
Now that you've released me, I'm allowed to grant three wishes. I'll give you each one wish, but if you don't mind, I'll keep the last one for my self.'
Wow, that's great!' the husband said. He pondered a moment and blurted out, 'I'd like a million dollars a year for the rest of my life.'
'No problem,' said the genie 'You've got it, it's the least I can do. And I'll guarantee you a long, healthy life!'
'And now you, young lady, what do you want?' the genie asked.
'I'd like to own a gorgeous home in every country in the world complete with servants,' she said.
'Consider it done,' the genie said. 'And your homes will always be safe from fire, burglary and natural disasters!'
'And now,' the couple asked in unison, 'what's your wish, genie?'
'Well, since I've been trapped in that bottle, and haven't been with a woman in more than a thousand years, my wish is to have sex with your wife.'
The husband looked at his wife and said, 'Gee, honey, you know we both now have a fortune, and all those houses. What do you think?'
She mulled it over for a few moments and said, 'You know, you're right. Considering our good fortune, I guess I wouldn't mind, but what about you, honey?'
You know I love you sweetheart,' said the husband. I'd do the same for you!'
So the genie and the woman went upstairs where they spent the rest of the afternoon enjoying each other.
The genie was insatiable.
After about three hours of non-stop sex, the genie rolled over and looked directly into her eyes and asked, How old are you and your husband?'
'Why, we're both 35,' she responded breathlessly.
'No Kidding,' he said.
'Thirty-five years old and you both still believe in genies?'
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The woman applying for a job in a Florida lemon
grove seemed to be far too qualified for the job.
The foreman frowned and said, "I have to ask you this:
"Have you had any actual experience in picking lemons?
"Well, as a matter of fact, I have!"
I've been divorced three times, owned 2 Chryslers,
and I voted for Obama."
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A woman decides to have a facelift for her 50th birthday.
She spends $15,000 and feels pretty good about the results.
On her way home, she stops at a news-agents to buy a newspaper.
Before leaving, she says to the sales assistant, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am??"
"About 32," is the reply.'
"No! I'm exactly 50," the woman says happily.
A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the very same question.
The girl replies, 'I'd guess about 29."
The woman replies with a big smile, "No, I'm 50."
Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a chemist on her way down the street.
She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the same burning question.
The sales assistant responds, "Oh, I'd say 30."
Again she proudly responds, "I'm 50, but thank you!"
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.
He replies, "Madam, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was.
It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra.
Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."
They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the best of her.
She finally blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead."
He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully.
He bounces and weighs each breast and he gently pinches each nipple.
He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other.
After a couple of minutes of this, she says, "Okay, okay....How old am I?"
He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, "Madam, you are 50."
Stunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible, how could you tell?"
The old man says, "Promise you won't get mad?"
"I promise I won't" she says.
"I was behind you at McDonald s."
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NEW BABY
With all the new technology regarding fertility recently, a 65-year-old
friend of mine was able to give birth. When she was discharged from
the hospital and went home, I went to visit.
'May I see the new baby?' I asked.
'Not yet,' She said 'I'll make coffee and we can visit for a while first.'
Thirty minutes had passed, and I asked, 'May I see the new baby now?'
'No, not yet,' She said.
After another few minutes had elapsed,
I asked again, 'May I see the baby now?'
'No, not yet,' replied my friend.
Growing very impatient, I asked, 'Well, when can I see the baby?'
'WHEN HE CRIES!' she told me.
'WHEN HE CRIES?' I demanded. 'Why do I have to wait until he CRIES?'
'BECAUSE I FORGOT WHERE I PUT HIM,O.K.?!!
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A very black little girl made her way into the presence of the lady of the house, and with much embarrassment, but very clearly, explained who she was, and what her mission:
"Please, mum, I'se Ophelia. I'se de washerwoman's little girl, an' mama, she sent me to say, would you please to len' her a dime. She got to pay some bills."
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A very black little girl made her way into the presence of the lady of the house, and with much embarrassment, but very clearly, explained who she was, and what her mission:
"Please, mum, I'se Ophelia. I'se de washerwoman's little girl, an' mama, she sent me to say, would you please to len' her a dime. She got to pay some bills."
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"I had a message from the Black Hand," said the resident of Graftburg. "They told me to leave $2,000 in a vacant house in a certain street."
"Did you tell the police?"
"Right away."
"What did they do?"
"They said that while I was about it I might leave them a couple of thousand in the same place."
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On opening his new store, a man received a bouquet of flowers. He became dismayed on reading the enclosed card, that it expressed "Deepest Sympathy".
While puzzling over the message, his telephone rang. It was the florist, apologizing for having sent the wrong card. "Oh, it's alright." said the storekeeper. "I'm a businessman and I understand how these things can happen."
"But," added the florist, "I accidentally sent your card to a funeral party." "Well, what did it say?" ask the storekeeper. "'Congratulations on your new location'." was the reply.
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A man comes home and hears hard breathing female noises from inside the aprtment, walks inside to find his wife on the floor of the living room naked.
Wife yells, "help, help, I am having a heart attack", the husband runs in the other room to call the doctor when one of his kids run up to him and says "daddy, daddy, there is a naked man in the closet", husband opens the closet door and sees his friend Bob.
He yells at Bob, "Bob, god damn it, my wife is having a heart attack and here you are trying to scare the kids"!!!
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Service in the restaurant was abysmally slow. My husband was starting to flip out, so I tried to distract him with small talk.
"You know," I said, "our friend Christi should be having her baby anytime now."
"Really?" my husband snapped. "She wasn't even pregnant when we walked in here."
White tea is a mild, sweet and fresh tea, that comes from a very healthy and rarer variety of the same plant as green tea (Camellia sinensis). It is produced mainly in the Fujian province of China and only consists of the most tender leaf buds that are covered in silvery, down-covered hairs.[1] These leaves can only be picked during 3 days of every year in early spring.
Containing up to three times as many antioxidants as green tea, this least-processed tea is the healthiest tea of all teas.[2] It has a mild and sweet flavor that is velvet-like in smoothness, and has none of the grass-like flavors some green teas can produce. Follow the steps below to make sure your white tea retains all its fine qualities while brewing.
Steps
Purchase your white tea. White tea is far more expensive than any other tea, so it's not likely you'll be consuming it daily but the price is worth it for weekend treats or other special occasions. Considering that you're spending a lot though, it's important to ensure that you're getting the best quality possible.
White tea has two versions: a traditional budset white tea (Fujian Silver Needle, Anhui, etc.) and a modern new style leaf white tea. They are not interchangeable and appear very different.[3]
White tea comes in several varieties, and they can differ significantly in price. Silver tip, jasmine silver tips, pai mu tan (white peony) and silver needle are the best varieties,[4] and they are often also the most popular. You may even need to place an order with your local tea store to ensure that you get a supply each spring.
If you're new to white tea, a good way to start is to buy a sampler kit from an online vendor. That way, you can try small amounts of several varieties to find your favorites.
White tea can be bought as loose leaves or as teabags. However, if the container is opaque and if there is a lack of labeling, be careful as you might get leaf when all you wanted was buds, etc.
Be sure to shop around to get the best deal possible. Since white tea is still relatively scarce, shopping online may be your best option.
Be absolutely certain your white tea purchase is fresh. Ask the vendor to ensure that you're buying the most recent harvest, from the most recent northern hemisphere spring.
Make sure that the tea you buy is packed in as airtight a container as possible. Keep it dry, cool and dark to prevent oxidation. White tea doesn't keep for years like black tea does; it must be consumed within six months of purchase.
Select the water. Choose good quality water. If you live in an area with hard water, filter it before you use it to brew. Hard water may ruin white tea, which has very delicate flavors.
Heat water to boiling, then let it cool for five to eight minutes. Alternatively, only boil the water to "first boil". This is when the water begins to boil but has not yet begin to simmer. The temperature at this stage will be 160ºF (71ºC). Bitter brews come from too high a temperature of water on green tea; prefer a longer steeping time at a cooler temperature instead.
Test the water temperature. Before adding the boiled water to the white tea, it should be no more than 158ºF to 167ºF (70ºC to 75ºC) or 160-170ºF (71-77ºC) at the most.[5][6]
If the water is too hot, the tea will be scalded, causing it to become bitter and astringent.
Select your method for brewing the white tea. Use a tea infuser basket, a tea ball, or a teapot.
Add two teaspoons of white tea leaves per cup.[7] Place the tea leaves into the infuser basket, tea ball, or teapot.
Steep. White tea leaves can withstand longer infusion times than other tea types before pouring. It is usual to steep for 7 to 10 minutes.[8] However, you may wish to experiment with a short steep initially (1 to 3 minutes) and then to graduate to longer steeping times, to find the steeping length you prefer.
Use the same leaves for steeping several cups of white tea, with steeping times increasing as needed. Some sources recommend a 90 second to 2 minute steeping if you intend on steeping the leaves several times.[9]
Serve. White tea should be served as it is, unadulterated. Don't pour milk or sugar in the white tea. The already subtle flavor of the tea will be drowned out, and the antioxidants will not be as effective.
Video
Tips
'Wake up' your tea leaves first by pouring hot water from your kettle over them and after a few seconds pour the water out.
Only use fresh water for tea, not water that has been sitting in the kettle for days. Fresh water makes the tea taste better.
It is best to use fresh, loose leaf white tea. Loose leaf tea make for a better tea experience than using teabags, and the fresher the tea is, the better it will taste. However, teabags are fine for work or if you really can't be bothered fiddling with loose tea leaves. It is better to drink it from a teabag than not at all!
Drink white tea from a clear cup, the better to enjoy its delicate appearance.
White tea has been shown to block DNA mutations which trigger tumor formation.[10]
Traditional budset white tea is so expensive because it is made exclusively from a select picking of plump spring buds, of which 10,000 handpicked ones result in 2.2 pounds (1 kilo) of the tea.[11]
Warnings
Do not pour boiling water onto white loose leaf tea. Doing so will scald and damage the leaves. White tea leaves are among the most delicate types of tea.
Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Brew White Tea. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.
The garbage men were just about to leave the street when a girl came running out of the house carrying some cardboard boxes.
'Am I too late for the garbage ?' she called.
'No,' replied one of the men, 'jump right in !'
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A woman has to do twice as much as a man to be considered half as good.
Fortunately, it isn't difficult!
Men are like a deck of cards
you need a heart to love them
a diamond to marry them
a club to beat them
a spade to bury the bastards1
Suzy Lee fell in love.
She planned to marry Joe. She was so happy 'bout it all,she told her pappy so. pappy told her, "Suzy gal, you'll have to find another. I'd just as soon you maw don't know, but Joe is you half-brother." so Suzy forgot about her Joe and planned to marry Will. But after telling Pappy this, he said, "There's trouble still." "you can't marry Will, my gal, and please don't tell yo mother, but Will is yo half-brother." But Mama knew and Mama said, "Chile, do what makes you happy. marry
Will or marry Joe, you ain't no kin to Pappy!"
DUMB AND DUMBER
A mother and father take their 6 year old son to a nude beach. As the boy walked along the beach, he noticed that some of the ladies had boobs bigger than his mother's and asked her why. She told her son, "the bigger they are the dumber the person is." The boy, pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocean but returns to tell his mother that many of the men have larger members than hid dad. his mother replied, "the bigger they are the dumber the person is." Again satisfied with his answer, the boy returns to the ocean to play. Shortly after, the boy returned again. He promptly told his mother, "Daddy is talking to the dumbest girl on the beach and the longer he talks, the dumber he gets!"
"Do not fear. I am a wall of protection around you." -- GOD
Philippians 3:12-14
(12) Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. (13) Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, (14) I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.
The word picture in Philippians 3:12-14 is of men straining to win a foot race. The Christian life is especially like the longer races where the runner must sustain a winning frame of mind over a longer period of time. We cannot run our race like the hare of the "Tortoise and the Hare" fable, in which the hare took a nap during the race.
Paul illustrates that after having received God's grace, our responsibility is to return full effort to God in striving to perfection in moral, ethical, and spiritual areas. He did not see the struggle against sin, fear, and doubt as being accomplished by God alone. The apostle is here urging his erring brothers to follow his example in persistently concentrating on our common goal.
Life for us now consists of discarding wrong attitudes and habits accumulated in the past. In modern, psychological terms, we must lose our baggage. For us, the past is dead, buried in the waters of baptism. With that behind us, we must diligently make unwavering progress in putting out the leaven of sin, growing in God's love, producing the fruit of God's Spirit, moving toward the Kingdom of God, and putting on Christ's perfection, His image in us.
Philippians 2:5-8
“In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death— even death on a cross!â€
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WORD FOR THE DAY:
catastrophe • kuh-TASS-truh-fee • noun
1 a : a violent and sudden change in a feature of the earth b : a violent usually destructive natural event (as a supernova) 2 : utter failure : fiasco
Examples:
The party was a catastrophe; the band didn't show up, the food was awful, and a sudden rain shower sent the guests running for cover.
"The democratization of economics owes much to the financial crisis that first hit in 2007. That ongoing catastrophe, which few economists predicted, tarnished the profession's reputation, prompting some to look elsewhere for answers." -- From an article by Stephen Mihm in The New York Times Magazine, December 19, 2010
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When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it's not, mmmmmmm, boy. –Jack Handey
"Chastity: the most unnaturl of the sexual perversions." - Aldous Huxley
Wilson Mizner "Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something."
Will Rogers "I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago."
W. C. Fields "The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep."
The heart hath its own memory, like the mind,
And in it are enshrined The precious keepsakes, into which is wrought The giver's loving thought.
—Longfellow.
THINGS TO PONDER: Why is toilet paper scented?
CONFUCIOUS QUOTE: The strength of a nation derives from the integrity of the home.
You might be a REDNECK if...
...you own a Waffle House credit card.
"Many of life's failures are people who
did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up." - Thomas Edison
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ALL ABOUT THE AMAZING APPLE
Apples
Botanical name: Malus domestica
Plant type: Fruit
USDA Hardiness Zones: 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8
Sun exposure: Full Sun
Soil type: Loamy
Soil pH: Neutral?
Bloom time: Summer, Fall
Ever wish you could have an apple orchard in your backyard? You can—in the space of a single tree—if you plant a hedge of dwarf apple trees or an apple espalier.
To get started, let's talk about selection criteria first:
Look for disease-resistant trees that give you the ability to grow organic fruit or to use fewer chemicals. Maintenance is easier, too.
Plant dwarf or semidwarf apple trees for ease of care and harvest. Dwarf trees won't take over the yard!
Buy dormant, bare-root, 1-year-old trees, is possible. Dwarfs and semidwarfs will bear in 3 to 4 years, yielding 1 to 2 bushels per year. Standard-size trees will bear in 5 to 8 years, yielding 4 to 5 bushels of apples per year.
Apples do not fertilize themselves; ideally, plant at least one other variety that blooms at the same time.
Choose the right rootstock (foundation). For dwarf trees, make sure that the rootstock is specified. A Bud 9 is a common, hardy tree that's easy to train for USDA Climate Zones 3 to 5. The M9 is probably the most widely planted rootstock, though it would die in frigid winters.
Planting
Spring planting is recommended in central and northern areas. Where fall and winter weather is generally mild and moist, fall planting is successful.
Climate Considerations
Not every apple grows everywhere. Each variety has a specific number of days needed for fruit maturity.
Tree tags don't always tell you where the variety grows best, but many catalogs do. Also, check with your county extension agent for a specific recommendation for your area.
As a general rule, if a tree is termed hardy, it grows best in Zones 3 to 5. If termed long-season, apple quality will be best in Zones 5 to 8. Check your zone here.
Each variety has a number of chill hours needed to set fruit (i.e., the amount of time temperatures are between 32 and 45 degrees F). The farther north you go, the more chill hours an apple variety needs to avoid late spring freeze problems. Check tree tags for chill hour information or ask the seller.
Site and Soil
Choose a sunny site. For best fruiting, an apple tree needs "full sunlight," which means six or more hours of direct summer sun daily. The best exposure for apples is a north- or east-facing slope.
Pay attention to the soil. Apple trees need well-drained soil, not too wet. Soil needs to be moderately rich and retain moisture as well as air; mulch with straw, hay, or some other organic material to keep soil moist and provide nutrients as they decompose.
Dwarf apple trees are notoriously prone to uprooting under the weight of a heavy crop, so you should provide a support system for your hedge. You can grow your trees against a fence, or you can provide free-standing support in the form of a trellis.
Cross-Pollinating
Cross-pollination occurs between varieties, so you need at least two different varieties, not just two different trees.
If you lack space for more than one apple tree (or do not want more than one), the pollen came come from somewhere else. You could graft a single branch of another variety onto your tree, rely on a nearby neighbor's tree or crab apple tree, or snip of a flowering branch from another variety at bloom time and set it into a bucket of water at the base of your tree.
For best results, include a 'Grimes Golden', 'Golden Delicious', 'Red Delicious', or 'Winter Banana' in your planting. These varieties are known pollinators.
Nursery catalogs will provide pollination charts.
Care
Minimize Pruning of a Young Tree
Pruning slows a young tree's overall growth and can delay fruiting, so don't be in a hurry to prune, other than removing misplaced, broken, or dead branches. There are several techniques to direct growth without heavy pruning. For example:
Rub off misplaced buds before they grow into misplaced branches.
Bend a stem down almost horizontally for a few weeks to slow growth and promote branches and fruiting. Tie down with strings to stakes in the ground or to lower branches.
Prune a Mature Tree Annually
Once an apple tree has filled in and is bearing fruit, it requires regular, moderate pruning.
Prune your mature tree when it is dormant. Completely cut away overly vigorous, upright stems (most common high up in the tree).
Remove weak twigs (which often hang from the undersides of limbs.
Shorten stems that become too droopy, especially those low in the tree.
After about ten years, fruiting spurs (stubby branches that elongate only about a half-inch per year) become overcrowded and decrepit. Cut away some of them and shorten others.
When a whole limb of fruiting spurs declines with age, cut it back to make room for a younger replacement.
Thin Ruthlessly
Thin or remove excess fruit. This seems hard but this practice evens out production, prevents a heavy crop from breaking limbs, and ensures better-tasting, larger fruit crop.
Soon after fruit-set, remove the smallest fruits or damaged ones,leaving four inches between those that remain.
Pests
Apples are prone to pests. Here are some pointers:
Keep deer at bay with repellents or fencing; deter mice and rabbits with wire-mesh cylinders around the base of the tree.
Sprays may be needed for insects, although one of the worst culprits, the apple maggot, can be trapped simply enough by hanging one or two round, softball-size balls, painted red and coated with sticky "Tangle-Trap," from a branch in June through the summer. Reapply the sticky goo a time or two, as necessary.
Fend off diseases by raking apple leaves, burying them beneath mulch, or grinding them with a lawn mower at season's end.
Pruning reduces disease by letting in more light and air.
Harvest/Storage
Harvest Patiently. After all this pruning and caring, be sure to harvest your apples at their peak of perfection.
Pluck your apples when their background color is no longer green.
Different apple varieties mature at different times, so the harvest season can stretch from August to October.
At this point, the stem should part readily from the branch when the fruit is cupped in the palm of your hand and given a slight twist around, then up.
If the apple is overripe and soft, use for cooking!
Apples keep well for about six months at temperatures between 32 and 45 degrees F.
"Baked apples have an excellent effect upon the whole physical system, feeding the brain as well as adding to the flesh, and keeping the blood pure; also preventing constipation and correcting a tendency to acidity, which produces rheumatism and neuralgia." –A Tip from The 1898 Old Farmer's Almanac
Recommended Varieties
Beyond climate considerations, how will you use your apples? Do you love to bake apple pies? Or, perhaps you just want apples that taste far better than what you could buy in a grocery store.
A young dwarf tree produces about 1 1/2 bushels of fruit—and even less when the tree is part of an apple hedge. So, if you're interested in baking lots of 'Cox's Orange Pippin' apple pies, you'll need to plant several trees of that variety to get enough fruit.
If you have no particular culinary goal, try planting one each of different varieties that ripen over the entire harvest season. Then you can enjoy regular apple tastings and still have enough fruit on hand for a "mess" of cooked apples.
Plant disease-resistant apple varieties such as 'Liberty', 'Jonafree', 'Macfree', and 'Williams Pride'.
Seek out the advice of local orchardists about the varieties that will do well in your area. Do the bulk of your planning from an easy chair, with a half-dozen nursery catalogs in your lap!
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California Turkey Burger
This turkey burger is fast, easy to make, and delicious!
Serves: 4
Prep. time: 10 minutes
Cooking time: 15 minutes
1 pound ground turkey or beef
3 tablespoons FRENCH'S CLASSIC YELLOW Mustard
1/2 cup cilantro, parsley, or basil
1/3 cup unseasoned dry bread crumbs
1 egg, beaten
Combine turkey, mustard, cilantro, bread crumbs and egg. Firmly shape into 4 patties.
Grill burgers over medium-high heat for 15 minutes or until no longer pink in center. Garnish as desired. Serve on buns with additional mustard.
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Apple Cake
Very light and not overly sweet. The poppy seeds add delicious texture. This is a good choice for a morning coffee cake, but we also liked it as a dessert, served with whipped cream or vanilla ice cream.
Yield: 12 to 15 servings
4 eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 cup (2 sticks) butter, melted
1-1/2 cups white sugar
2 cups all-purpose white flour
4 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
4 teaspoons poppy seeds
6 to 8 apples, peeled, cored, and sliced (Golden Delicious, Rome, Northern Spy, etc.)
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Grease a 9-inch by 13-inch baking pan.
Beat together the eggs, vanilla, butter, and sugar. Sift together the flour, baking powder, salt, and cinnamon. Add to the egg mixture along with the poppy seeds and blend well. Gently fold in the apples. Pour into the prepared pan.
Bake for 45 to 50 minutes or until a tester inserted near the center comes out clean. Let cool in the pan. Serve warm or completely cooled.
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Apple Pie with Cider Pecan Crust
Yield: 6 servings
Crust:
2 cups unbleached flour
2/3 cup shortening
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup finely crushed pecans
1/2 cup cold cider
Preheat oven to 425 degrees F. Prepare crust by cutting shortening into flour and salt until particles are the size of giant peas. Mix in pecans; sprinkle dough with cider and mix gently until dough holds together. Divide dough into 2 balls and roll out.
Filling:
7 firm, juicy, tart apples
1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup raisins
1/2 cup diced candied fruit
1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice
1 tablespoon cold butter
Topping:
1 egg yolk
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1 tablespoon sugar
Pare, core, and slice apples, and toss them with spices, sugar, raisins, candied fruit, and lemon juice. Put filling into bottom crust and dot with butter. Cover with top crust and make slits in it. Brush top crust with egg yolk and dust with cinnamon and sugar. Bake for 50 to 60 minutes.
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Apple Quiche
Fabulous! What a wonderful change of pace for brunch or lunch! Use an apple that will hold its shape when baked -- Granny Smith, Golden Delicious, Rome, or Northern Spy will all work. Avoid McIntosh and Red Delicious.
Yield: 6 servings
5 to 6 large apples, peeled and sliced
1 unbaked 9-inch pie shell
1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese
2 eggs, beaten
1 cup evaporated milk
1/2 teaspoon salt
dash of nutmeg
dash of cinnamon
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
Place the apples in the pie shell. Sprinkle the cheese over the apples. In a small bowl, mix together the eggs, milk, salt, nutmeg, and cinnamon. Pour over the apples. Bake for 60 to 70 minutes. Let stand for 10 minutes before serving warm, or serve chilled.
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Steak Burritos
4 servings
Active Time: 30 minutes
Total Time: 30 minutes
INGREDIENTS
1/2 cup prepared fresh salsa
1/2 cup water
1/4 cup instant brown rice
1 15-ounce can black beans, preferably low-sodium, rinsed
12 ounces strip steak, trimmed and thinly sliced crosswise
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
1 tablespoon canola oil
4 8-inch tortillas, preferably whole-wheat
1/2 cup shredded sharp Cheddar cheese
1/4 cup prepared guacamole
2 tablespoons coarsely chopped fresh cilantro
PREPARATION
Combine salsa and water in a small saucepan; bring to a boil. Stir in rice, reduce heat to a simmer, cover and cook for 5 minutes. Stir in beans, return to a simmer and cook, uncovered, stirring occasionally, until the rice is tender and most of the liquid is absorbed, about 5 minutes more.
Meanwhile, sprinkle steak with pepper. Heat oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add steak and cook, stirring occasionally, until browned and cooked through, 3 to 5 minutes.
To assemble, divide the steak among the tortillas and top with equal amounts of cheese, guacamole, cilantro and the rice mixture. Roll each tortilla up into a burrito.
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Five-Ingredient Rhubarb Squares
PREP TIME: 15 Min
TOTAL TIME 1 Hr 25 Min
SERVINGS 16
INGREDIENTS
1 box Betty Crocker SuperMoist yellow cake mix
1 cup cold butter or margarine, cut into small pieces
1 3/4 cups sugar
3 eggs
4 cups sliced fresh rhubarb
Whipped cream, if desired
1 Heat oven to 350°F (325°F for dark or nonstick pan). Reserve 2 tablespoons of the cake mix. In large bowl, cut butter into remaining cake mix, using pastry blender (or pulling 2 table knives through ingredients in opposite directions), until crumbly. In bottom of ungreased 13x9-inch pan, pat 2 1/4 cups of the mixture (if mixture is sticky, lightly flour hands). Reserve remaining crumbly mixture for topping. Bake 15 minutes. Remove from oven.
2 In large bowl, beat reserved 2 tablespoons cake mix, the sugar and eggs with electric mixer on medium speed until creamy. Stir in rhubarb. Pour over partially baked crust. Sprinkle remaining crumbly mixture over top.
3 Bake 45 to 55 minutes longer or until golden brown and center is set. Cool slightly before serving. Serve warm or cold with whipped cream. Store covered in refrigerator.
Expert Tips
If fresh rhubarb isn't available, use 4 cups frozen (slightly thawed) rhubarb (from two 16-oz bags).
If you have a food processor, you can use it to cut the butter into the cake mix, using on-and-off pulses, until crumbly.
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Planet Hollywood Thai Shrimp Pasta & Sauce
1/2 cup Thai Sauce (see recipe below)
1 teaspoon butter
1 teaspoon chopped garlic
16 jumbo shrimp, peeled and deveined (16 to 20 or 26 to 30 count)
1 cup julienne-cut vegetables (celery, carrots, bell pepper and/or
onion)
1 tablespoon freshly chopped cilantro, divided
1 tablespoon chopped peanuts, divided
10 ounces uncooked linguine, cooked
2 tablespoons chopped green onion (to garnish)
Prepare Thai Sauce (recipe below) and set aside. Place butter and
garlic in clean, heated saute pan. Cook 1 minute. Add shrimp, cook
3 minutes, turning occasionally to cook evenly. Add additional
butter if pan becomes too dry.
Add cut vegetables, half of the cilantro and half of the peanuts.
Add 1/2 cup Thai Sauce (or more to taste) and mix.
Add shrimp/vegetable mixture to pasta, tossing well to coat. Remove
shrimp from mixture.
Divide pasta with vegetables and sauce between 2 serving bowls.
Place reserved shrimp, tails up, around rims of bowls, facing
toward middle. Garnish center of each bowl with the onions,
remaining peanuts and cilantro.
Makes 2 servings.
NOTE: Additional Thai sauce can be added to this dish or remaining
sauce can be refrigerated 4 to 5 days and used in another dish.
Thai Sauce:
2 tablespoons ketchup
3/4 teaspoon rice vinegar
1 1/2 teaspoon sesame oil
1/2 teaspoon hot and spicy oil (chili oil can be substituted)
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 teaspoon onion powder
1 1/2 teaspoon hoisin sauce
1/2 teaspoon fresh chopped garlic
1/2 teaspoon freshly chopped ginger root
1/8 cup lemon juice
1/2 teaspoon Chinese mustard powder
2 tablespoons soy sauce
1 1/2 teaspoon water
1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper
1/4 cup sweet chili sauce
1/2 teaspoon peanut butter
Place all ingredients except crushed red pepper in blender and
blend well.
Place in storage container. Mix in crushed pepper. Use 1/2 cup or
more to make Thai Shrimp Pasta, and refrigerate remaining sauce.
Sauce keeps 4 to 5 days.
Note: Hoisin sauce and sweet chili sauce are available at Asian
specialty stores.
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The stranger advanced toward the door. Mrs. O'Toole stood in the doorway with a rough stick in her left hand and a frown on her brow.
"Good morning," said the stranger politely. "I'm looking for Mr. O'Toole."
"So'm I," said Mrs. O'Toole, shifting her club over to her other hand.
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Said a great Congregational preacher
To a hen, "You're a beautiful creature."
And the hen, just for that,
Laid an egg in his hat,
And thus did the Hen reward Beecher.
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Pat had gone back home to Ireland and was telling about New York.
"Have they such tall buildings in America as they say, Pat?" asked the parish priest.
"Tall buildings ye ask, sur?" replied Pat. "Faith, sur, the last one I worked on we had to lay on our stomachs to let the moon pass."
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TEACHER—"Good little boys do not skate on Sunday, Corky. Don't you think that is very nice of them?"
CORKY—"Sure t'ing!"
TEACHER—"And why is it nice of them, Corky?"
CORKY—"Aw, it leaves more room on de ice! See?"
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A merchant captain and several of his officers were returning to the ship after an evening of partying ashore.
As they climbed the gangway, the captain threw up all over himself. Pointing to an apprentice seaman above, him he shouted, "Give that man five days in the brig for vomiting!"
The following morning the captain was checking the log and saw that the young seaman had been sentenced to ten days and asked the chief mate why.
"Well Sir, when we got you undressed we found that he'd also took a dump in your pants."
Remember, knowledge is everything, so pass it on...and go move your toothbrush!!!
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I stopped smoking reefer because I started thinking, if great men throughout history had smoked reefer, no tellin' what would have happened. Like if somebody like Martin Luther King Jr. had smoked reefer, he would have been giving speeches like, 'I had a dream, but the hell if I could remember what it was about. It was either about freedom or Fritos.'
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DID YOU KNOW?
Did you know that drinking two glasses of Gatorade can relieve headache pain almost immediately-without the unpleasant side effects caused by traditional pain relievers?
Did you know that Colgate Toothpaste makes an excellent salve for burns?
Before you head to the drugstore for a high-priced inhaler filled with mysterious chemicals, try chewing on a couple of curiously strong Al toids peppermints. They'll clear up your stuffed nose.
Achy muscles from about of the flu? Mix 1 tablespoon horseradish in 1 cup of olive oil. Let the mixture sit for 30 minutes, then apply it as a massage oil for instant relief for aching muscles.
Sore throat? Just mix 1/4 cup of vinegar with 1/4 cup of honey and take 1
tablespoon six times a day. The vinegar kills the bacteria.
Cure urinary tract infections with Al ka-Seltzer. Just dissolve two tablets in a glass of water
and drink it at the onset of the symptoms. Al ka-Seltzer begins eliminating urinary tract infections almost instantly-even though the product was never advertised for this use.
Honey remedy for skin blemishes. Cover the blemish with a dab of honey and place a Band-Aid over it. Honey kills the bacteria, keeps the skin sterile, and speeds healing. Works overnight.
Listerine therapy for toenail fungus: Get rid of unsightly toenail fungus by soaking your toes in Listerine Mouthwash. The powerful antiseptic leaves your toenails looking healthy again.
Easy eyeglass protection. To prevent the screws in eyeglasses from loosening, apply a small drop of Maybelline Crystal Clear Nail Polish to the threads of the screws before tightening them.
Cleaning liquid that doubles as bug killer. If menacing bees, wasps, hornets, or yellow jackets get in your home and you can't find the insecticide, try a spray of Formula 409. Insects drop to the ground instantly.
Smart splinter remover: Just pour a drop of Elmer's Glue all over the splinter, let dry, and peel the dried glue off the skin. The splinter sticks to the dried glue.
Hunt's Tomato Paste boil cure. Cover the boil with Hunt's Tomato Paste as a compress. The acids from the tomatoes soothe the pain and bring the boil to a head.
Balm for broken blisters. To disinfect a broken blister, dab on a few drops of Listerine, a powerful antiseptic.
Vinegar to heal bruises. Soak a cotton ball in white vinegar and apply it to the bruise for
1 hour. The vinegar reduces the blueness and speeds up the healing process.
Quaker Oats for fast pain relief. It's not for breakfast anymore! Mix 2 cups of Quaker Oats and 1 cup of water in a bowl and warm in the microwave for 1 minute, cool slightly, and apply the mixture to your hands for soothing relief from arthritis pain.
If you send this to one person who doesn't know about this, then it was worth it.
"Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being, And in the hidden part You will make me know wisdom."1
It has been wisely said that 80% of life's satisfaction comes from healthy, loving and satisfying relationships. No matter how successful one becomes in the eyes of the secular world, without loving relationships, life can become extremely empty and lonely. Like, who wants to be the richest man in the cemetery when life on earth is over?
The reality is that mankind was created for meaningful and loving relationships—without which one can limp along in the shadows of life instead of fully loving and fully living.
As noted before, God himself is in relationship; that is, via the Holy Trinity—God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. Furthermore, one of the very first things Jesus did at the beginning of his earthly ministry was to "choose the twelve that they might be with him."2 If Jesus needed to be in relationship with people, how much more do we need to be?
One of the major keys for effective relationships is effective communications at the feeling level. We can converse intellectually at the rational level, but without sharing at the feeling level there cannot be any closeness or emotional intimacy. Couples who don't know how to communicate effectively basically live together alone apart.
Tragically, at least in the Western world, we know how to put a man on the moon and talk to him while he is there, but so many married couples don't know how to talk (communicate) effectively with their partner which involves open, honest, and trustworthy sharing at the feeling level.
Best-selling author, Dr. John Powell, believes that "most of us feel that others will not tolerate emotional honesty in communication. We would rather defend our dishonesty on the grounds that it might hurt others, and, having rationalized our phoniness into nobility, we settle for superficial relationships. Consequently, we ourselves do not grow, nor do we help anyone else to grow. Meanwhile, we have to live with repressed emotions—a dangerous and self-destructive path to follow. Any relationship which is to have the nature of true personal encounter must be based on honest, open, gut-level communication. The alternative is to remain in my prison, to endure inch-by-inch death as a person."3
Just one tip here . . . don't ever tell anyone that they shouldn't feel the way that they feel. We feel what we feel because we are what we are. Feelings in and of themselves are neither right nor wrong. We just need to understand them. Plus, we need to learn how to accept other people's feelings without being judgmental or trying to "fix" them. Watching a TV interview last night with a young girl who was upset and began to cry, the interviewer (a grown man) simply told her not to cry. This made her feel worse and communicated to her that it isn't acceptable to cry when you are hurt or sad. Tears are a God-given gift and are needed to drain the pain of hurt feelings. That is; genuine tears, not crocodile tears that are designed to manipulate or to conceal anger.
For further help in knowing how to communicate openly and honestly, please read the article, "Dare to Be Honest" online at: http://tinyurl.com/dare-to-be-honest.
Dear God, "Thank you that you created mankind for relationships. Please help me learn how to be a more effective communicator so that this will help me to have greatly enriched relationships. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus' name, amen."
Jeremiah 14:1-16
(1) The word of the LORD that came to Jeremiah concerning the droughts.
(2) " Judah mourns,
And her gates languish;
They mourn for the land,
And the cry of Jerusalem has gone up.
(3) Their nobles have sent their lads for water;
They went to the cisterns and found no water.
They returned with their vessels empty;
They were ashamed and confounded
And covered their heads.
(4) Because the ground is parched,
For there was no rain in the land,
The plowmen were ashamed;
They covered their heads.
(5) Yes, the deer also gave birth in the field,
But left because there was no grass.
(6) And the wild donkeys stood in the desolate heights;
They sniffed at the wind like jackals;
Their eyes failed because there was no grass."
(7) O LORD, though our iniquities testify against us,
Do it for Your name's sake;
For our backslidings are many,
We have sinned against You.
(8) O the Hope of Israel, his Savior in time of trouble,
Why should You be like a stranger in the land,
And like a traveler who turns aside to tarry for a night?
(9) Why should You be like a man astonished,
Like a mighty one who cannot save?
Yet You, O LORD, are in our midst,
And we are called by Your name;
Do not leave us! (10) Thus says the LORD to this people:
" Thus they have loved to wander;
They have not restrained their feet.
Therefore the LORD does not accept them;
He will remember their iniquity now,
And punish their sins." (11) Then the LORD said to me, "Do not pray for this people, for their good. (12) When they fast, I will not hear their cry; and when they offer burnt offering and grain offering, I will not accept them. But I will consume them by the sword, by the famine, and by the pestilence." (13) Then I said, "Ah, Lord GOD! Behold, the prophets say to them, 'You shall not see the sword, nor shall you have famine, but I will give you assured peace in this place.'" (14) And the LORD said to me, "The prophets prophesy lies in My name. I have not sent them, commanded them, nor spoken to them; they prophesy to you a false vision, divination, a worthless thing, and the deceit of their heart. (15) Therefore thus says the LORD concerning the prophets who prophesy in My name, whom I did not send, and who say, 'Sword and famine shall not be in this land'—'By sword and famine those prophets shall be consumed! (16) And the people to whom they prophesy shall be cast out in the streets of Jerusalem because of the famine and the sword; they will have no one to bury them—them nor their wives, their sons nor their daughters—for I will pour their wickedness on them.'
Notice what is happening. The land is suffering from a drought. Did the people connect drought with obedience to the message of a false minister? Probably not.
The spirit that was speaking to them was not divine, but it was supernatural. The people submitted to it because they did not put the prophet to the test to see whether or not his teaching was in harmony with what had already been revealed through God's messenger, Moses.
God blames the plight of the nation on the false prophets to whom the people listened. What did the prophets do? They lulled the people into complacency, which led them to believe that all was well when it was not. They preached to them smooth things because the people had itching ears. They liked the things that were taught to them, but it was not the Word of God. God says the preached lies in His name. If one listens to them, then it is the same thing as the blind leading the blind and both falling in the ditch.
The land was in drought. How many carnal people would connect a drought with obedience to a false minister? Not very many because they would be thinking carnally and say, "It's just part of the cycle of things. It happens every so many years." They are not thinking that there might be a spiritual cause for it: that God is concerned about the well being of His people, and that He had brought the drought to make them think about why it is happening. The cause for concern is spiritual in nature.
Would any U.S. President or presidential candidate make an appeal to American citizens that the cause of our problems are spiritual in nature? If a national figure said before a group of people that the reason we are having troubles in the United States is that we need to repent and get back to our God, they would be laughed into shame and contempt. The reason we are seeing the immorality in the United States is the effect of listening to false ministers!
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WORD FOR THE DAY:
ensconce • in-SKAHNSS • verb
1 : to place or hide securely : conceal
2 : to establish or settle firmly, comfortably, or snugly
Examples: Rather than ensconce the discouraging news in falsely hopeful language, the doctor imparted the diagnosis in a clear, straightforward manner. "From Wednesday morning through Sunday night, nine men and one woman along with assorted helpers and facilitators will be sequestered on the 15th floor of The Westin hotel in Indianapolis. Ensconced in a luxury bunker, they won't come out for good until they've decided the 68 NCAA men's tournament teams, seeded them and placed them in the brackets." -- From an article by Rusty Miller for the Associated Press, March 7, 2011
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Cream butter, white and brown sugars in mixer bowl until light and fluffy. Add flour, cinnamon and salt; mix well. Reserve 1 cup of mixture for topping.
Combine sour cream, eggs and soda in small bowl. Add to creamed mixture; mix well.
Sprinkle greased 8-inch square pan with pecans. Spoon batter over top. Sprinkle with reserved topping. Bake at 350 degrees for 35 minutes. Makes 9 to 12 servings.
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Apple Orchard Easy Cookies
1 stick margarine
2 cups sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons flour
1 cup apples, unpeeled, grated
3 cups oatmeal
1 cup walnuts, chopped
1 teaspoon vanilla
Sugar and cinnamon mixture, for rolling
Melt margarine. Stir in sugar, salt, flour and apples. Bring to a boil and boil 1 minute. Remove from heat. Add oats, nuts and vanilla. Stir, then cool. Roll spoonsful of dough in cinnamon and sugar, then drop onto waxed paper. Cover, refrigerate and serve; no baking required.
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Easy Hoagie Bake
2 (8 ounce) packages refrigerated crescent rolls
1/4 pound salami
1/4 pound cooked ham
1/4 pound pepperoni sausage
8 slices Provolone cheese
1 egg, beaten
2 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Cover bottom of a 9x13 inch baking dish with 1 package crescent
rolls. Layer salami, ham and pepperoni. Cover meat with a layer of
Provolone cheese and. Spread 1/2 of the beaten egg over the cheese. Top with second package of crescent rolls. Brush with
remaining beaten egg and sprinkle with Parmesan cheese.
Bake uncovered in the preheated oven for 25 minutes. Cover with
3/4 - of a 16 oz. package spaghetti or fusilli cooked and drained
Grated Parmesan cheese
Heat the oil in a 10-inch skillet over medium heat. Add the onion, green pepper, garlic powder and red pepper, if desired, and cook until tender, stirring often.
Stir the pasta sauce in the skillet. Heat to a boil. Add the shrimp. Reduce the heat to low. Cover and cook for 5 minutes or until the shrimp turn pink, stirring occasionally. Serve over the spaghetti. Sprinkle with the cheese.
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Sugar Free Orange Fluff
1 small pkg of sugar free orange jello
1 small pkg of instant vanilla pudding
1 can of mandarin oranges (drained)
1 small sugar free cool whip (8 oz)
Dissolve jello in 1 cup hot water. Add 1 cup of ice cubes. Let sit for 5 minutes. Remove unmelted ice cubes. With mixer add vanilla pudding package and mix well. Fold in oranges with spoon and then cool whip. Set in fridge for at least an hour.
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Luscious Key Lime Dessert
Create a cool and creamy dessert for a crowd that can be made the day ahead. The easy cookie crust gets a jump start from a mix.
2 containers (8 oz each) frozen whipped topping, thawed
2 containers (6 oz each) Yoplait Original 99% Fat Free Key lime pie yogurt
Few drops green food color, if desired
1 tablespoon grated lime peel
1/2 cup fresh berries (blueberries, raspberries, strawberries)
1 Heat oven to 350°F. Spray bottom and sides of 13x9-inch pan with cooking spray.
2 Place cookie mix in large bowl. With pastry blender or fork, cut in butter until mixture is crumbly and coarse. Lightly press crumbs in bottom of pan. Bake 10 to 12 minutes or until golden brown. Cool.
3 In large bowl, beat condensed milk and lime juice with electric mixer on medium speed until smooth and thickened. Remove 1 cup of the whipped topping; set aside. Fold remaining whipped topping, yogurt and food color into milk mixture. Spoon into cooled crust. Cover and refrigerate about 1 hour or until set.
4 To serve, cut into 5 rows by 4 rows. Garnish each serving with a dollop of remaining whipped topping, lime peel and fresh berries. Cover and refrigerate any remaining dessert.
Expert Tips
If Key limes aren’t available in your grocery store, look for bottled Key lime juice near the other bottled juices.
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Just ONE example of why English is SO difficult to learn . . . . .
Think about it.
UP
Read until the end.....you'll laugh....
This two-letter word in English has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that word
is 'UP.' It is listed in the dictionary as an , , , or .
It's easy to understand UP, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we
wake UP?
At a meeting, why does a topic come UP? Why do we speak UP, and why are the
officers UP for election and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report? We call UP our friends, brighten UP a room, polish UP the
silver, warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen. We lock UP the house and fix UP the old car.
At other times this little word has real special
meaning. People stir UP trouble, line UP for
tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses. To be dressed is one thing but to be dressed UP is special.And this UP is confusing: A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP.We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP !
To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP,look UP the word UP in the dictionary.. In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4 of the page andcan add UP to about thirty definitions If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used. It will take UP a lot of yourtime, but if you don't give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more. When it threatens to rain, we say it is
clouding UP . When the sun comes out we say it is clearing UP. When it rains, it soaks UP the
earth. When it does not rain for awhile, things dryUP. One could go on & on, but I'll wrap
it UP, for now ........my time is UP !
Oh....one more thing: What is the first thing you do in the morning & the last thing you do at night?
U P !
(you pee !)
Did that one crack you UP?
Don't screw UP. Send this on to everyone you
look UP in your address book..or not...it's UP to you.
Now I'll shut UP
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Best Smart Ass Answers of 2010!!
SMART ASS ANSWER #6
It was mealtime during an airline flight.
'Would you like dinner?', the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.
'What are my choices?' John asked.
'Yes or no,' she replied.
SMART ASS ANSWER #5
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat, she said, 'Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub.'
SMART ASS ANSWER #4
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, 'Do these turkeys get any bigger?'
The stock boy replied, 'No ma'am, they're dead...'
SMART ASS ANSWER #3
The police officer got out of his car as the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. 'I've been waiting for you all day,' the officer said.
The kid replied, Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.'
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
SMART ASS ANSWER #2
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway and noticed a sign that read: Low Bridge Ahead. Before he knows it, the bridge is right in front of him and his truck gets wedged under it. Cars are backed up for miles.
Finally a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, 'Got stuck, huh?'
The truck driver says, 'No, I was delivering this bridge and I ran out of gas.'
SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2009!!
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. 'Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness,
or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!'
A smart-ass student in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, 'What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?' The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student, shook her head and sweetly said, 'Well,
I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand.'
A BONUS EXTRA
A woman is standing nude looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly... I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect!'
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FOR THOSE WHO THOUGHT THEY KNEW EVERYTHING . . HERE IS A REFRESHER COURSE:
The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for Blood plasma.
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No piece of paper can be folded in half
more than seven (7) times. Oh go ahead...I'll wait...
"Rise above your fears into My Joy. It will heal your sores and wounds." -- GOD
What Happens When We Die?
God's Word, the Bible, says, "We do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord's own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words."1
A Daily Encounter subscriber enquires: "The Bible states that when Christ comes back that he will raise the dead in Christ. Does this mean Christ will raise the Christians or the non-Christians? Before my mother died she said to me, 'Honey I will soon be happy when I am with your baby brother.' My brother died when he was four months old and my mother lived with the guilt that she may have rolled over on him. That was years ago when sudden infant death was not known about. So is my Mom now with Christ?"
Hello Jeanie (name changed). When Jesus came to earth 2,000 years ago his coming covered a period of 33 years. He has promised that he will come again and this time it will cover a period of some seven years. First it is with what the theologians call the Rapture.
This refers to all the Christians who have died (and their souls have gone on to Heaven to be with the Lord) when their bodies will be raised and the Christians who are still living will be caught up together with them in the air to go to heaven to be with Jesus. This is the beginning of the Second coming of Jesus. Back here on earth, however, will be the beginning of the seven-year great tribulation and the entrance of the Antichrist. At the end of this seven-year period we will return with Christ to the earth to rule and reign with him for the next thousand years. After this God is going to create a new heaven and a new earth and all the true followers of Jesus will be together with the Lord for all eternity.
Those who have died and are not Christians; that is, those who have never received Jesus as their Savior will be raised at the end of the thousand years and then, before the Great White Judgment Throne of God, will be judged for their sins and will have to pay the just penalty themselves because they refused or failed to ask for and receive God's forgiveness. They will then be cast into Hell (whatever and wherever that may happen to be) and be there forever without any hope.2
Suggested prayer: "Dear God, thank you for your promise that if I am a true follower of Jesus, you will take me to be with you in Heaven when I die, and that when you come again, my body will be raised and so shall I ever be with the Lord. And thank you for dying in my place to pay the penalty for all my sins, and forgiving me, so that I know I will never be sent to Hell—the place that is prepared for the Devil and his demons. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully in Jesus' name, amen."
Colossians 1:27-28
“To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory. He is the one we proclaim, admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that we may present everyone fully mature in Christ.â€
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WORD FOR THE DAY:
vitrine • vuh-TREEN • noun
: a glass showcase or cabinet especially for displaying fine wares or specimens
Examples:
The tiny antiquarian bookshop has some books that are available for browsing, but the rarer and more valuable volumes are housed in the tall vitrines that line the walls.
"A weathered wooden child's chair is stacked atop its twin, with two bright pink plastic bowls stacked on the top seat. In an adjacent vitrine sits a miniature version of this assemblage, the tiny pieces placed in the center of a bright orange square of velvet." -- From an art exhibit review by Jessica Baran in the Riverfront Times (St. Louis, MO), February 24, 2011
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CONFUCIOUS QUOTE: The book salesman should be honored because he brings to our attention, as a rule, the very books we need most and neglect most.
THINGS TO PONDER: What was the best thing before sliced bread?
You might be a REDNECK if...
...your bumper sticker says, "My other car is a combine."
"When life's problems seem overwhelming, look around and see
what other people are coping with. You may consider yourself fortunate."
- Ann Landers
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How to Elevate Your Self Esteem
For many years now, "self-esteem" has been synonymous with "positive self image," but that's not really what self-esteem is. Positive self-image is important - it's caring about yourself and seeing yourself as a unique and special individual simply because of who you are as a human being.
Self-esteem is a positive sense of one's own worth that is based on actually doing worthy things - it's that feeling you get when you've accomplished something, and it's a great feeling. Here's how to build it and help others lift theirs in the process.
Steps
1 Do things and live life so that you impress yourself. There's only one way to elevate your self-esteem - earn your own respect. Many times we try to impress others but that's a fool's game. The person you really need to impress is you. Always seek to improve yourself against your own achievements, your own milestones, not anyone else's.
Stop trying to win other's respect. Live your life with integrity and self-determination based on what impresses you, and respect will follow.
While other people's opinions and ideas have their place in your life, don't set your life according to them. Listen and take on board what works for you but only internalize that which you believe improves you or works for because you have made a choice for yourself.
2 Set goals and work toward them. They don't have to be pie-in-the-sky, they can just be gradual improvements. For example: you have a B- overall grade point average. Resolve to raise your GPA at least a half grade each semester until you are a B+, then you will renegotiate. Begin to study harder, join a study group or choose a study partner. As you begin to gain mastery of your schoolwork and see your GPA rise to a B and finally to a B+, you will have a solid sense of accomplishment - and your self-esteem will rise.
3 Gain accomplishments and achievements. Study hard. Take that B+ and turn it into Honors by keeping it there for one to three years. Or play hard at a sport. Even if you are only average, the more you practice, the better you will get, and that's an achievement of its own. Choose something to excel at, choose a goal, and work hard toward it until you achieve - even working toward bettering yourself for the sake of doing it is a worthy pursuit.
4Value noble pursuits. Academics and sports are time-honored traditional pursuits which can bring out the best in a person by testing intellectual and physical limits, and fostering individual and team efforts.
5 Help someone. Volunteer at a retirement home or a homeless shelter. Get involved with your church in a ministry to the sick or the poor. Donate your time and service to a humane animal shelter. Be a Big Brother or Big Sister. Nothing is more rewarding than offering your time and talent to elevate someone else's situation. And getting outside your own head and your normal circle of influence can be eye opening and humbling.
6 Practice humility. No one was ever a greater public servant than Mother Teresa, she helped the poor, the sick and the dying, and never turned anyone away. Yet Mother Teresa was a strong, noble soul who knew that if she did not help these people, perhaps no one would. That's real self-esteem: "I am only one person, but I can help these people." That's knowing and believing in the power of One Person to make a real difference.
7 Pass your skills and talents on to someone. Teaching someone your specialty will show you how much you really do know and have to offer. As you help a novice learn the skills you have honed, you will feel their admiration and respect for your prowess. In turn, you will be helping another develop those same skills, so that they may be passed on again.
8Allow children to build self-esteem honestly. Just because they're kids doesn't mean they're stupid - do you really think they don't know you let them win? Self-esteem isn't built by being handed a win. It's built by actually winning. Play a game with with your kid until he or she masters it - it can be anything: Dominoes, Scrabble, Pokemon, a video game, Hearts - and whatever you do, do not play down to him or her. When you win, celebrate. Don't belittle him or call him a loser, just say, "Yay, I win!" And then say, "Let's see, did you make any mistakes? Maybe you didn't - maybe it was just a bad draw. Let's look at your game and see where it could improve." Help him, show him how to improve, and play again. Eventually, he or she will beat you. When she/he does, tell him or her to stand up on the table and do a victory dance. Look at her or his face. See how your child feels when he/she knows he/she earned this win, fair and square, and on his or her own? It's a huge difference, because it tells the child they have the power to win, if he/she sticks with something and tries hard. It can set the tone for the way she or he goes at things the rest of her or his life. Don't "let" them win. By doing so you rob him of the chance to earn a win honestly.
Tips
Nobody can give you self-esteem. You have to earn it yourself.
Choosing non-competitive activities is perfectly acceptable, but competing, even if you don't win, is exciting and does help you sharpen your skills - thereby building your estimation of yourself.
By the same token, remember that competition in sports and similar activities is healthy, whereas competition in which you compare yourself negatively with others and try to be "better" than them is not. You can never know what life is really like for other people; much of it can be show, so setting your standards by other people's clothes, belongings, and rank at the office will simply demoralize you and lower your self-esteem.
Believe that you can make a difference, one person or task at a time. Over time, as your efforts bear fruit, you will feel your inner sense of satisfaction at your accomplishments.
Have a sense of humor - especially about yourself. Don't take yourself too seriously, keep things in perspective.
Warnings
Avoid the temptation to turn self-esteem into conceit and arrogance. People with good self-esteem are very attractive. Arrogant louts aren't.
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Ham and Swiss Cheese Potato Bake
Make a quick, kid-pleasing meal with ingredients you have on hand!
Serves: 6
Prep. time: 10 minutes
Cooking time: 65 minutes
1 package Betty Crocker julienne potatoes
2 1/2 cups boiling water
2/3 cup milk
1 1/2 cups cubed fully cooked ham
1 cup shredded Swiss cheese, (4 ounces)
1/2 cup Progresso plain dry bread crumbs
1. Heat oven to 400°F. Stir together Potatoes, Sauce Mix and boiling water in ungreased 2-quart casserole. Stir in milk, ham and cheese.
2. Bake uncovered 50 minutes; sprinkle with bread crumbs. Bake 10 to 14 minutes longer or until top is golden brown.
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Kentucky Butter Cake
This Kentucky butter cake recipe features a moist, old-fashion Bundt cake soaked with a beautiful buttery glaze. Special thanks to Rebecca from the blog Ezra Pound Cake, for sharing this great butter cake recipe.
Makes One (10-inch) Kentucky Butter Cake
Prep Time: 20 minutes
Cook Time: 60 minutes
Total Time: 80 minutes
Ingredients:
1 cup (2 sticks) butter
2 cups sugar
4 eggs
3 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup buttermilk
2 teaspoons vanilla or rum extract
.
Glaze:
3/4 cup sugar
1/3 cup butter
3 tablespoons water
2 teaspoons vanilla or rum extract
Preparation:
Preheat oven to 325 degrees F.
Grease a 10-inch Bundt pan with a nonstick spray and dust lightly with flour; set aside. In a medium bowl, combine the flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Set aside.
In the bowl of a standing mixer fitted with the paddle, beat the butter and sugar for 3 minutes at medium speed. Lower mixer speed and add eggs, one at a time. Continue to beat for 1 minute.
Alternate adding the flour mixture and buttermilk, ending with the flour. Add vanilla or rum extract. Beat on medium-high speed for 20 seconds. Pour batter into prepared pan, and bake for about 60 minutes, or until a wooden toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean.
To make the glaze: In a small saucepan, combine sugar, butter, water and vanilla or rum extract. Do not boil. When the cake comes out of the oven, prick it with a wooden skewer or fork. Pour the glaze slowly over the cake. Let the cake cool completely before removing it from the pan.
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Garden-Style Red Rice
Fire-roasted tomatoes lend robust flavor to rice, while frozen mixed vegetables add extra nutrition.
PREP TIME 10 Min
TOTAL TIME 40 Min
SERVINGS 8
INGREDIENTS
1 can (14.5 oz) fire-roasted crushed tomatoes, undrained
4 cups chicken broth
1 teaspoon tomato bouillon granules with chicken flavor
1 bag (12 oz) Green Giant Valley Fresh Steamers frozen mixed vegetables
1 In blender, place tomatoes, 1 cup of the broth, the bouillon and garlic. Cover; blend on low speed 20 to 30 seconds or until smooth.
2 In 4-quart Dutch oven, heat oil over medium-high heat. Cook onion in oil until tender, stirring constantly. Stir in rice; cook 1 to 2 minutes, stirring constantly, just until rice begins to turn golden.
3 Carefully stir in tomato mixture. Cook about 1 minute or until mixture starts to bubble. Stir in remaining broth, parsley sprigs, chiles and salt. Return mixture to boiling.
4 Cover and cook over low heat 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. Stir in frozen vegetables; cook 8 to 10 minutes, stirring frequently, until vegetables are tender and liquid is absorbed. Remove parsley sprigs.
Expert Tips
Look for chopped garlic in jars in the produce department. Follow the directions on the jar for the correct amount to use.
Serve this flavorful rice in yellow, red or green bell peppers that are cut in half lengthwise and seeded.
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Chili Cornbread Casserole
Active Time: 1 Hour
Total Time: 1 Hour 30 Minutes
Yield: 8 servings
Here’s a fun way to serve chili and cornbread together. Don’t let the ingredient list intimidate you—this casserole is easy to make and a real crowd pleaser.
Make Ahead Tip: Prepare chili (Step 1); cover and refrigerate for up to 3 days or freeze for up to 3 months; defrost chili (if frozen) and continue with the recipe, baking the casserole for 50 minutes. Or prepare and bake the casserole as directed; let cool for 1 hour; cover and refrigerate for up to 3 days; let stand at room temperature for 30 minutes, then reheat at 350°F for 50 minutes.
INGREDIENTS
For Chili:
1 tablespoon canola oil
1 large onion, chopped
1 green bell pepper, chopped
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 pound 95%-lean ground beef
2 15-ounce cans kidney beans, rinsed
1 28-ounce can crushed tomatoes, undrained
3 tablespoons chili powder
1 tablespoon ground cumin
1 teaspoon sweet paprika
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper (optional)
For Cornbread:
1 1/4 cups cornmeal
3/4 cup whole-wheat flour
2 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 large egg, lightly beaten
1 1/4 cups low-fat milk
2 tablespoons canola oil
1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro
1 1/2 cups shredded extra-sharp cheddar cheese
DIRECTIONS
To prepare chili: Heat oil in a Dutch oven over medium heat. Add onion and cook until beginning to soften, about 4 minutes. Add bell pepper and garlic and cook for 1 minute. Add beef and cook, breaking it up with a wooden spoon, until browned, 4 to 5 minutes. Stir in beans, tomatoes and their juice, chili powder, cumin, paprika and cayenne (if using). Bring to a boil; reduce heat to maintain a simmer, cover and cook until slightly thickened, about 20 minutes.
Preheat oven to 350°F. Coat a 9-by-13-inch (or similar 3-quart) baking dish with cooking spray.
To prepare cornbread: Whisk cornmeal, flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda and salt in a large bowl. Whisk egg, milk and oil in a medium bowl. Add the wet ingredients to the dry ingredients along with cilantro and stir until just combined. Transfer the chili to the prepared baking dish and sprinkle with cheese. Spread the cornbread batter evenly over the chili.
Bake the casserole until the top springs back when touched lightly, 20 to 25 minutes. Let stand for 10 minutes before serving.
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Broccoli, Beef & Potato Hotdish
Active Time: 45 Minutes
Total Time: 1 Hour 40 Minutes
Yield: 8 servings
This easy casserole, full of ground beef, roasted broccoli and topped with hash browns, was inspired by the classic Minnesota Tater Tot hotdish. Roasting the broccoli before adding it to the casserole gives the whole dish a much more complex and exciting flavor, but it’s by no means necessary. If you want to keep it simple, skip roasting the broccoli (Step 2) and use 6 cups frozen broccoli, thawed, in its place (omit 1 tablespoon oil, as well).
Make Ahead Tip: Prepare through Step 6; cover and refrigerate for up to 1 day or freeze for up to 1 month (defrost in the refrigerator for 2 days before baking). Let stand at room temperature for 30 minutes before baking (Step 7).
4 cups frozen hash-brown or precooked shredded potatoes (see Note)
1 large egg, lightly beaten
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
Canola or olive oil cooking spray
1/4 teaspoon Hungarian paprika, preferably hot
Note: Precooked shredded potatoes can be found in the dairy section of most supermarkets or near other fresh prepared vegetables in the refrigerated produce section. To make your own, halve 1 pound unpeeled baking potatoes; cook in lightly salted boiling water until slightly tender but still firm in the center, 7 to 10 minutes. Let cool on a clean cutting board. Shred using the large holes of a box grater.
DIRECTIONS
Preheat oven to 450°F.
Toss broccoli with 1 tablespoon oil in a large bowl. Spread out on a baking sheet and roast, stirring once halfway though, until just soft and browned in spots, about 15 minutes.
Meanwhile, heat the remaining 1 tablespoon oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Add beef and onion and cook, breaking up the beef with a wooden spoon, until the beef is browned and the onion is softened, 10 to 12 minutes. Stir in Worcestershire, garlic powder and 1/4 teaspoon salt. Set aside.
Whisk milk and cornstarch in a large saucepan. Bring to a boil over medium-high heat, whisking often, until bubbling and thickened enough to coat the back of a spoon, 6 to 8 minutes total. Remove from the heat and stir in Cheddar, 3/4 teaspoon salt and turmeric until the cheese is melted.
Spread the beef mixture in a 9-by-13-inch (or similar 3-quart) baking dish. Top with the broccoli and pour the cheese sauce evenly over the top.
Combine potatoes, egg, pepper and the remaining 1/4 teaspoon salt in a medium bowl. Sprinkle evenly over the casserole. Coat the top with cooking spray.
Bake the casserole until it is bubbling and the potatoes are beginning to brown, about 40 minutes. Sprinkle with paprika. Let stand for 10 minutes before serving.
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Washington Apple Cocktail drink
Ingredients to use:
2ozApple Schnapps
2ozCranberry juice
2ozRye/Whiskey
Directions:Mix together with crushed ice in a glass and garnish with mint leaves
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Bread Winner...
I was speaking to an emergency room physician this morning. He told me that a woman in her 20s came to the ER with her 8th pregnancy. She stated, "my momma told me that I am the breadwinner for the family."
He asked her to explain. She said that she can make babies and babies get money for the family. It goes like this: The grandma calls the Department of Child and Family Services and states that the unemployed daughter is not capable of caring for these children. DCFS agrees and states that the child or children will need to go to foster care.
The grandma then volunteers to be the foster parent, and thus receives a check for $1500 per child per month in Illinois .
Total yearly income:
$144,000 tax-free, not to mention free healthcare (Medicaid) plus a monthly card entitling her to free groceries, etc, and a voucher for 250 free cell phone minutes per month. This does not even include WIC and other welfare programs.. Indeed, grandma was correct in that her fertile daughter is the "breadwinner" for the family.
This is how the ruling class spends our tax dollars.
Sebastian J. Ciancio, M.D. Urologist, Danville Polyclinic, LTD
Is this a GREAT COUNTRY or what...
Don't forget to pay your taxes!!!
There are a lot of "Breadwinners" depending on you & me.
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Custom at Duquesne University dictated that if a professor was ten minutes late, class was canceled. One professor arrived early for a 9 a.m. lecture. He placed his hat on his desk, and went to the faculty room. Before he knew it, it was 9:10. By the time he got back to his classroom, it was empty. The next day, he let his students have it. "When my hat is here," he fumed, "I'm here!"
The following day, the professor arrived at 9 a.m. He was met by the sight of 28 hats on 28 desks -- and no students.
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A young woman once entered our bank and wanted to cash a check. "Do you have any identification?" I asked.
"Yes," she said. "I have a strawberry mark over my left knee."
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The best illustration of the value of brief speech reckoned in dollars was given by Mark Twain. His story was that when he had listened for five minutes to the preacher telling of the heathen, he wept, and was going to contribute fifty dollars, after ten minutes more of the sermon, he reduced the amount of his prospective contribution to twenty-five dollars, after half an hour more of eloquence, he cut the sum to five dollars. At the end of an hour of oratory when the plate was passed, he stole two dollars.
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During the worst of the spy-scare period in London a man was brought into the police station, who declared indignantly that he was a well-known American citizen. But his captor denounced him as a German, and offered as proof the hotel register, which he had brought along. He pointed to the signature of the accused. It read:
"V. Gates."
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A colored parson, calling upon one of his flock, found the object of his visit out in the back yard working among his hen-coops. He noticed with surprise that there were no chickens.
"Why, Brudder Brown," he asked, "whar'r all yo' chickens?"
"Huh," grunted Brother Brown without looking up, "some fool niggah lef de do' open an' dey all went home."
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A wife after the divorce, said to her husband: "I am willing to let you have the baby half the time."
"Good!" said he, rubbing his hands. "Splendid!"
"Yes," she resumed, "you may have him nights."
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An accountant visited the Natural History museum.
While standing near the dinosaur he said to his neighbor: "This dinosaur is two billion years and ten months old".
"Where did you get this exact information?" "I was here ten months ago, and the guide told me that the dinosaur is two billion years old."
Asshole was waiting for me with his vampire-like teeth exposed as his thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl.
I couldn't help being a half an hour late - it took me that long to tie my shoes.
He took me to work out with dumbbells. When he was not looking, I ran and hid in the restroom.
He sent some skinny little bitch to find me.
Then, as punishment, he put me on the rowing machine -- which I sank.
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FRIDAY:
I hate that bastard Christo more than any human being has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world.
Stupid, skinny, anaemic, anorexic little aerobic instructor. If there was a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat him with it.
Christo wanted me to work on my triceps. I don't have any triceps!
And if you don't want dents in the floor, don't hand me the damn barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich.
The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher.
Why couldn't it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?
__________________________
SATURDAY:
Satan left a message on my answering machine in his grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today.
Just hearing his voice made me want to smash the machine with my planner; however, I lacked the strength to even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the Weather Channel.
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SUNDAY:
I'm having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over.
I will also pray that next year my husband will choose a gift for me that is fun -- like a root canal or a hysterectomy.
I still say if God had wanted me to bend over, he would have sprinkled the floor with diamonds!!!
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Deer Loses Head-Butt Battle with Wisconsin Lawn Ornament
Courtesy the La Crosse Tribune
- A seven-point buck lost a fight with a 640-pound concrete elk lawn ornament in the backyard of Mark and Carol Brye's home in Viroqua , Wis. last week.
- The buck was apparently sparring with the lawn ornament. Mark Brye, 58, couldn't help but laugh about the unusual incident, the La Crosse Tribune reports.
- "Our son and daughter gave it to us for Christmas four years ago because we like to hunt elk," Brye told the Tribune. "The elk is a nice thing to see every morning. It looks pretty cool, especially on a foggy morning."
- Brye said he knew exactly what happened when he saw the elk tipped over on its side, but wasn't expecting to find the bucks carcass lying about 20 yards away.
- The deer shattered its skull. Brye claimed the deer using a deer tag issued by a Vernon County conservation warden. The warden's tag note read: "lawn ornament fight & lost."
- He took the deer to a butcher and now has a freezer full of venison.
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New Wine for Seniors
California vintners in the Napa Valley area, which primarily produce Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir and Pinot Grigio wines, have developed a new hybrid grape that acts as an anti-diuretic.
It is expected to reduce the number of trips older people have to make to the bathroom during the night.
"Share your troubles, failures, heartaches with Me. I will share My Patience and My Strength with you." -- GOD
Our Daily Devotional:
Not My Will
Luke 9:23-24, NIV: "Then he said to them all: 'If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.'"
If I were to deny to myself, what would that look like? Jesus denied Himself, and it meant a life of slavery to God the Father. He counted His rights to anything from this life as forfeit: "Not my will, but Thy will..." Am I willing to recognize that I must deny myself what I want out of life in order that God's purpose be fulfilled in me? Am I willing to take up my cross daily and follow Him? Jesus took up His cross as one condemned to die. Do I live as though I am on death row--condemned to die? If so, my considerations are to putting my house in order, seeking God, and loving others while there is time. I do not plug away making for myself a life in this world, for the next world weighs heavy on my mind. "...anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me" (Mt. 10:38). The natural reaction is to begin to question, "But, doesn't God want me to have..." this or that? God wants our full and complete surrender to Jesus. In turn, He is able to give you what He wants you to have--and that is far greater than anything we would seek for ourselves.
But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.
- Isaiah 53:5
1 Peter 1:18-19
“For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect.
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WORD FOR THE DAY:
aspersion • uh-SPER-zhun • noun
1 : a sprinkling with water especially in religious ceremonies 2 a : a false or misleading charge meant to harm someone's reputation b : the act of making such a charge : defamation
Examples:
Melissa believed that Roger had unjustly cast aspersions on the quality of her research.
"There's always, for whoever is president, the opponents, the people on the other side who cast aspersions that they may not even believe themselves…." -- Laura Bush in an interview on Fox News Network, May 16, 2010
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You might be a REDNECK if...
...you've ever used a toilet seat as a picture frame.
THINGS TO PONDER: Why do old men wear their pants higher than young men do?
CONFUCIOUS QUOTE: Success depends upon previous preparation, and without such preparation there is sure to be failure.
"I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to
accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble."
- Helen Keller
"Everybody knows if you are too careful you are so occupied in being careful that you are sure to stumble over something. "
- Gertrude Stein
Steven Wright
"I invented the cordless extension cord."
Spike Milligan
"All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy."
Samuel Johnson
"Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives."
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Ham & Cheese Breakfast Casserole
6 servings
Active Time: 30 minutes
Total Time: 1 3/4 hours
INGREDIENTS
4 large eggs
4 large egg whites
1 cup nonfat milk
2 tablespoons Dijon mustard
1 teaspoon minced fresh rosemary
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
5 cups chopped spinach, wilted (see Tip)
4 cups whole-grain bread, crusts removed if desired, cut into 1-inch cubes (about 1/2 pound, 4-6 slices)
1 cup diced ham steak, (5 ounces)
1/2 cup chopped jarred roasted red peppers
3/4 cup shredded Gruyère, or Swiss cheese
PREPARATION
Preheat oven to 375°F. Coat a 7-by-11-inch glass baking dish or a 2-quart casserole with cooking spray.
Whisk eggs, egg whites and milk in a medium bowl. Add mustard, rosemary and pepper; whisk to combine. Toss spinach, bread, ham and roasted red peppers in a large bowl. Add the egg mixture and toss well to coat. Transfer to the prepared baking dish and push down to compact. Cover with foil.
Bake until the custard has set, 40 to 45 minutes. Uncover, sprinkle with cheese and continue baking until the pudding is puffed and golden on top, 15 to 20 minutes more. Transfer to a wire rack and cool for 15 to 20 minutes before serving.
TIPS & NOTES
Make Ahead Tip: Prepare casserole through Step 2; refrigerate overnight. Let stand at room temperature while the oven preheats. Bake as directed in Step 3.
Tip: To wilt spinach, rinse thoroughly with cool water. Transfer to a large microwave-safe bowl. Cover with plastic wrap and punch several holes in it. Microwave on High until wilted, 2 to 3 minutes. Squeeze out excess moisture before adding the spinach to the recipe.
NUTRITION
Per serving: 286 calories; 10 g fat ( 4 g sat , 3 g mono ); 167 mg cholesterol; 23 g carbohydrates; 23 g protein; 4 g fiber; 813 mg sodium; 509 mg potassium.
Nutrition Bonus: Vitamin A (70% daily value), Folate (37% dv), Calcium (30% dv), Vitamin C (20% dv).
1 (10 3/4-oz.) can condensed cream of chicken soup
1 cup Green Giant Frozen Sweet Peas, thawed
1/2 cup sour cream with chives
4 cups prepared mashed potatoes
Cooked real bacon pieces, if desired
1 In 3 1/2 or 4-quart slow cooker, combine chicken, carrots, onion, bell pepper, paprika, seasoned salt and soup; mix well.
2 Cover; cook on Low setting for 6 to 8 hours.
3 About 10 minutes before serving, stir thawed peas and sour cream into chicken mixture. Cover; cook an additional 10 minutes or until thoroughly heated. Serve chicken mixture with mashed potatoes; sprinkle with bacon.
Expert Tips
Paprika is made from ground dried red peppers. Hungary and Spain make the finest paprika. Supermarkets carry mild paprikas, while ethnic markets carry more pungent varieties.
Cut the fat by about 5 grams per serving by substituting reduced-fat cream of chicken soup and nonfat sour cream for the regular versions.
A simple tossed green salad and pecan shortbread cookies complete the meal.
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Baked Honey-Glazed Ham
Yields: 6 servings
Prep time: 20 min
Cook time: 2 hr
Ingredients:
1 (6- to 8-pound) Smoked ham
2 tablespoons prepared mustard
1 cup firmly-packed brown sugar
1/2 cup honey
Whole cloves
Unsweetened slices fresh or canned pineapple rings
Maraschino Cherries
1 cup slightly sweet white wine
1 cup ginger ale or 7 Up
Preparation:
Preheat oven to 250 degrees F. or if pressed or time, 300 degrees F. Remove the rind from the ham and most of the fat, leaving an even layer about 1/8-inch thick. Place the ham in a roasting pan lined with heavy-duty aluminum foil (this will eliminate a nasty clean-up later). Score the fat on the ham (making a diamond pattern).
In a small bowl, combine prepared mustard, brown sugar, and honey. Rub the ham all over with the mustard-honey sauce, pressing sauce into the cut marks. Stick a whole clove in the center of each diamond. Using toothpicks, secure slices of pineapple to the ham. Then in the center of each pineapple ring, secure maraschino cherries with toothpicks.
NOTE: If preparing half a ham, cover the cut end with heavy-duty aluminum foil, secured with toothpicks, to keep the meat from drying out.
Bake the ham, fat side up, from 2 to 4 hours (depending on the size and weight of your ham) or until internal temperature reads 140 °F. on a meat thermometer. Baste every 30 minutes with equal parts wine and ginger ale, or ginger ale only. Later in the cooking, baste with pan juices. When done, remove from oven and transfer to a carving board. Let the ham stand for 30 minutes before carving.
This is the type of cooking and meat thermometer that I prefer and use in my cooking. I get many readers asking what cooking/meat thermometer that I prefer and use in my cooking and baking. I, personally, use the Thermapen Thermometer shown in the photo on the right. Originally designed for professional users, the Super-Fast Thermapen Thermometer is used by chefs all over the world. To learn more about this excellent thermometer and to also purchase one (if you desire), just click on the underlined: Thermapen Thermometer.
When slicing, cut away the rind and any excess fat. Then cut into slices, as thin as possible.
Add accumulated carving juices to the remaining sauce and serve separately. Arrange the meat on a warmed serving platter.
Makes 6 servings.
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Provencal Orange and Honey Salad
3 oranges
2 tablespoons honey*
1 lemon, zested and juiced
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil or to taste
Fresh basil or mint leaves, cut in chiffonade (thin strips)**
* Use a light-tasting liquid honey, such as clover or orange blossom
** Vary the herb garnish according to how you plan to serve the salad. Basil is best when it is a first course or salad, while mint suits as an intermezzo or dessert.
Using a sharp knife, cut the top and bottom off the oranges to expose the flesh. Stand the orange upright, cut away the peel, following the contours of the orange and removing all white pith along with the peel. Trim off any bits of white left on the orange.
When all the oranges are peeled, slice them crosswise into 1/4-inch-thick rounds. Put the orange rounds and any collected juices in a shallow bowl or deep-dish pie plate.
Pour the honey over the sliced oranges and gently toss with a rubber spatula to coat. Set aside in a cool spot (or the refrigerator if you like) for 1 hour.
To serve: Grate a heaping teaspoon of lemon zest from the lemon and set aside. Squeeze the lemon. Drizzle with the olive oil. Scatter over the lemon zest and herbs, and serve.
For individually plated salads: Pour about 1 1/2 teaspoons of lemon juice on each plate. Drizzle with the olive oil. Scatter over the lemon zest and herbs, and serve.
For a platter presentation: Pour 2 tablespoons of juice onto the platter. Spoon the orange slices and the accumulated orange juice onto the plates or platter. Drizzle with the olive oil. Scatter over the lemon zest and herbs, and serve.
Variation: Layer the orange slices with slices of ripe tomato and sprinkle the whole dish with Fleur de sel or sea salt.
Makes 4 to 6 servings.
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Slow Cooker Mushroom Swiss Steak and Gravy
With just 20 minutes in the morning, you can assemble Swiss steak ingredients and have it going in the slow cooker.
Prep time: 20 Min
TOTAL TIME 8 Hr 20 Min
SERVINGS 6
INGREDIENTS
1 large onion, chopped (1 cup)
2 medium carrots, sliced (1 cup)
1 can (4 oz) Green Giant mushroom pieces and stems, drained
1 can (18 oz) Progresso Vegetable Classics creamy mushroom soup
1 can (8 oz) tomato sauce
1In 3- to 4-quart slow cooker, layer onion, carrots, mushrooms and beef. Sprinkle pepper over beef. In medium bowl, mix soup and tomato sauce; pour over beef.
2Cover; cook on Low heat setting 8 to 10 hours.
3Place beef on serving platter. With slotted spoon, remove vegetables from cooker and spoon over beef. Stir gravy in cooker with wire whisk to blend. Serve gravy with beef.
Expert Tips
There is plenty of yummy gravy to serve over mashed potatoes or hot noodles. Coleslaw completes the meal.
To save time, measure out 1 cup of purchased frozen chopped onion the night before, and place in the refrigerator to thaw.
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Slow Cooker Chicken Marsala
PREP TIME 10 Min
TOTAL TIME 5 Hr 25 Min
SERVINGS 8
INGREDIENTS
2 cloves garlic, finely chopped
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
8 boneless skinless chicken breasts
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon pepper
2 jars (6 oz each) Green Giant® sliced mushrooms, drained
1 cup sweet Marsala wine or Progresso® chicken broth (from 32-oz carton)
1/2 cup water
1/4 cup cornstarch
3 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley
1Spray 4- to 5-quart slow cooker with cooking spray. In cooker, place garlic and oil. Sprinkle chicken with salt and pepper; place in cooker over garlic. Place mushrooms over chicken; pour wine over all.
2Cover; cook on Low heat setting 5 to 6 hours.
3Remove chicken from cooker; place on plate and cover to keep warm. In small bowl, mix water and cornstarch until smooth; stir into liquid in cooker. Increase heat setting to High; cover and cook about 10 minutes or until sauce is slightly thickened.
4Return chicken to cooker. Cover; cook on High heat setting 5 minutes longer or until chicken is hot.
5To serve, spoon mushroom mixture over chicken breasts; sprinkle with parsley.
Expert Tips
Serve on a bed of white rice with a green salad.
Make sure to use sweet Marsala wine. Dry Marsala makes this dish taste too acidic.
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Raspberry-Lemonade Cake
Betty Crocker created the poke cake, a cake that's poked after baking so the topping forms pockets of wonderfulness. Try this delicious citrus-berry combo.
1 Heat oven to 350°F (325°F for dark or nonstick pan). Spray bottom only of 13x9-inch pan with baking spray with flour. In small bowl, mix hot water and gelatin until gelatin is completely dissolved; cool slightly.
2 In large bowl, beat cake mix, 1/4 cup of the gelatin mixture, 1/4 cup of the lemonade concentrate, the water, oil, and egg whites with electric mixer on low speed 30 seconds. Beat on medium speed 2 minutes. Pour into pan. Reserve remaining gelatin mixture and lemonade concentrate.
3 Bake 30 to 35 minutes or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Poke warm cake every inch with fork tines. Remove 1 tablespoon of the reserved gelatin mixture to microwavable custard cup or small bowl. In another small bowl, mix remaining gelatin mixture and remaining 1/4 cup lemonade concentrate; pour slowly over cake. Cool completely, about 1 hour.
4 In medium bowl, fold together frosting and whipped topping; frost cake. Microwave 1 tablespoon gelatin mixture uncovered on High 10 seconds to liquefy. Using 1/4 teaspoon measuring spoon, place small drops of gelatin mixture over frosting; with spoon or toothpick, swirl gelatin into frosting. Garnish each piece with raspberries and lemon peel strips. Store covered in refrigerator.
Expert Tips
For a shower dessert, garnish each piece with a small paper beverage umbrella.
If you plan to tote this cake, be sure to use an insulated cooler to keep it cold.
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QUESTION: Why does the town idiot take his bedroom door off the hinges and put it to the sid every night when he goes to sleep?
ANSWER: Because he's afraid someone would look through the keyhole.
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As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.
Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on 280 Interstate.
Please be careful!" "Hell," said Herman, "It's not just one car.
It's hundreds of them!"
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Three men stood before a judge on a charge of drunk and disorderly conduct in a public park.
Judge: What were you doing?
1st man: Oh, just throwing peanuts in the pond.
Judge: And what were you doing?
2nd man: I was throwing peanuts in the pond, too."
Judge: Sounds harmless.
And you, were you throwing peanuts in the pond as well?
3rd man: No, sir.
I AM Peanuts!
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Longtime friends were celebrating their 50th anniversary. One of their sons gave a loving toast, finishing with, "and thank you for having such a beautiful marriage."
"Thank you for making it necessary," the father joked.
In the silence that followed, his wife whispered, "Not him. He's the second son."
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As a customer service representative for a book publisher, I frequently received inquiries about the books put out by the company. I'd use my computer to search for the title, which was displayed on the screen with a list of related material for suggested reading. A customer once phoned and asked whether we published A Raisin in the Sun. When my computer concluded its search, I started to chuckle. Under "other suggested reading" was listed The Grapes of Wrath.
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Salesman: "Another advantage of this machine, madam, is that it is fool-proof."
Sweet Thing (placidly): "No doubt, to the ordinary kind. But you don't know my husband."
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A WOMAN'S WEEK AT THE GYM
This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine.
Dear Diary,
For my birthday this year, my husband (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me.
Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.
I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Christo, who identified himself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear.
My husband seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started. The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.
ChalTag2010
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MONDAY:
Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Christo waiting for me.
He is something of a Greek god - with blond hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!!
Christo gave me a tour and showed me the machines. I enjoyed watching the skilful way in which he conducted his aerobics class after my workout today.
Very inspiring!
Christo was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time he was around. This is going to be a FANTASTIC week!!
_____________________________
TUESDAY:
I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door.
Christo made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air then he put weights on it!
My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. His rewarding smile made it all worthwhile.
I feel GREAT!! It's a whole new life for me.
_______________________________
WEDNESDAY:
The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it.
I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn't try to steer or stop.
I parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot.
Christo was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members.
His voice is a little too perky for that early in the morning and when he scolds, he gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying.
My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Christo put me on the stair monster.
Why the hell would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators?
Christo told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. He said some other shit too.
